This question is for "jack mormons", you know who you are. What happens when non members become "friends" ?

Question

My husband and I used to have friends who were LDS. When other LDS members found out ," The Magic of the Church" squelched it. What happened. We aren't LDS.

Answer 1

I'm not a "jack mormon" just a normal active one, but I don't really understand what happened here - I've got lots of Non-LDS friends, granted there are some activities they do that I just won't join them in (drinking, hanging out at bars etc) but they're still my friends.

Answer 2

I"m not a jack mormon either, but to my knowledge nothing happens. Or at least it shouldn't come from the church if it does. If something happens it should be that individuals just don't have anything or enough in common.
I think it's very odd that it happened. I'm sorry it happened, but we are counseled by our church leaders (from Bishop all the way to Prophet) to be nice and friendly to non-members. That by befriending our non-member neighbors, coworkers, etc, we can show them that we Mormons aren't any more weird or crazy than anyone else (as a whole).
Some people, unfortunately, drop friends when they realize that friend has no interest in the church. I find this very disturbing, and a giant pot mark on how non-members see us. I'm really sorry it happened.

To vinslave, it should never have happened. Especially if you were a member. That's what Visiting Teaching and Home Teaching is about really. It's like you have or should have built in friends that come to see you and check on you, even when you go inactive.

For those who don't know, a Jack Mormon is a term that is sometimes used to describe Mormons who are Mormon in name only, they don't adhere to the standards of the church. So even though the church is against drinking alcohol, they may drink alcohol, or smoke, or something like that. Personally I don't like the term, as we all struggle with various things, theirs just happens to be more public.

Answer 3

The LDS church does not care who their members friends are. It sounds more like your 'friends' had some issues of their own that probably made them be such jerks. Yes, I have seen some members of the LDS church decide they don't want to be friends with non-members because they get the crazy idea that it doesn't look right and appearance is more important then friendship. And I have also had the sad misfortune to know one person who would only be friends with a non-LDS person to see if they could get them to convert. But it is not what the church would ever want of it's members. It is not right and I think you may be better off with them as ex-friends if they don't have any more care about your feelings then that. Any LDS person who would drop a friendship because of either of these 2 reasons are self-centered people and would be this way no matter what religion they were. Please don't judge most of us LDS by their actions because most of us don't need our friends to be mirror images of ourselves, we want them be care about us like we care about them.

Answer 4

Same thing happened to me with my sister...we were very, very close and then all of a sudden she didn't want to hang out with me and when she did, she had to have another LDS with her. 20 yrs later and I've never been alone with her! All the mormons in here will deny it of course. They always say it doesn't happen but I hear stories from so many people. Very sad and then they lie and say it doesn't happen!

Answer 5

I don't know when the talk was, but Pres. Gordon B. Hinckley did tell us from the pulpit that we are NOT to stop being friends with non-members, just because they won't join the church. And it's for this very reason. It makes non-members hate not only us, but our church as well.
It's good to have friends who are not members, especially if they are of other Christian denominations, because we can learn about each other's beliefs and learn to appreciate them.

If I had to stop having anything to do with non-members, that would have meant throwing away my family (parents, sibs, etc.) and what good would THAT have done? I know that they will never join the LDS church, not in this lifetime, but they (at least, my parents) now have a greater appreciation and understanding of my beliefs. They even came to my daughter's baptism, and when we opened our temple, they came to the open house.

Your friends were not friends. They were, well, idiots. Don't judge all Mormons because of them.

This is what M. Russell Ballard, one of the Quorum of the Twelve, said in a conference talk:

"Occasionally I hear of members offending those of other faiths by overlooking them and leaving them out. This can occur especially in communities where our members are the majority. I have heard about narrow-minded parents who tell children that they cannot play with a particular child in the neighborhood simply because his or her family does not belong to our Church. This kind of behavior is not in keeping with the teachings of the Lord Jesus Christ. I cannot comprehend why any member of our Church would allow these kinds of things to happen. I have been a member of this Church my entire life. I have been a full-time missionary, twice a bishop, a mission president, a Seventy, and now an Apostle. I have never taught—nor have I ever heard taught—a doctrine of exclusion. I have never heard the members of this Church urged to be anything but loving, kind, tolerant, and benevolent to our friends and neighbors of other faiths.

The Lord expects a great deal from us. Parents, please teach your children and practice yourselves the principle of inclusion of others and not exclusion because of religious, political, or cultural differences.

While it is true we declare to the world that the fulness of the gospel of Jesus Christ has been restored to the earth through the Prophet Joseph Smith and we urge our members to share their faith and testimonies with others, it has never been the policy of the Church that those who choose not to listen or to accept our message should be shunned or ignored. Indeed, the opposite is true. President Gordon B. Hinckley has repeatedly reminded us of this special obligation that we have as followers of the Lord Jesus Christ. I quote just one:

“Each of us is an individual. Each of us is different. There must be respect for those differences. …

“… We must work harder to build mutual respect, an attitude of forbearance, with tolerance one for another regardless of the doctrines and philosophies which we may espouse. Concerning these you and I may disagree. But we can do so with respect and civility” (Teachings of Gordon B. Hinckley [1997], 661, 665).

Answer 6

As with any religion or set of beliefs, it sadly happens sometimes. And that is very, very sad because we believe in being friends with people of all faiths (or non-faiths) for the simple reason of friendship and not just to convert someone to our religion. I have tons of friends who aren't LDS, and it is not for the sake of conversion or anything but the sake of friendship.

Answer 7

You're not the only one to have suffered at the hands of this variety of discrimination. As soon as my interest in the LDS world waned, I was ignored and not considered a friend... too funny imo.

_()_

Answer 8

The Atheist mafia allegedly morphed into the AE and Atheati, nevertheless those group dont, and by no ability have existed. What are you even speaking approximately? atheist? i dont understand that word, why would i be a member of a set of them? What are you asserting? are you asserting something? Vinni those days have been given extra investment, in case you have been questioning...

Answer 9

I know many Mormons that have many non member friends. What difference does it make if your friends are active, jack or non memebers, everyone can be friends.

Answer 10

I am not a Mormon, but have many friends and family that are. They do not act any diffrently about friendship than anyone else I know.