2007-03-20 07:18:01 · 22 answers · asked by Tracie E 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Sister or not she is a potential guest. All you need to do is call and ask if she will be able to attend because you need to know for a head-count for the caterer and leave it at that. Dont start family wars you dont need to.
Remember the best rule of thumb with people that bother you.... "Kill" them with kindness, this means try to genuinely be nice to her, dont by sappy or sarcastic. Your fiance' will appreciate that you are being nice dispite your dislike for her.
2007-03-20 07:28:28 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Oh the joys of a wedding. I would talk about this matter with your future husband. Let him know she hasn't contacted you about weather she is coming or not. Letting him know that you would want her there to see her brother get married and sharing your special day. Makes you the better person. Let him deal with it. That way if later she starts anything your covered. And move on to planning the sitting arrangement at your reception. Thats fun can't sit this person at the same table as this person. Only kidding. Good luck on your wedding and I hope its wonderful.
2007-03-20 07:35:24 · answer #2 · answered by dee g 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Give her until a day or two after the "please respond by" date, then call her and say, "We haven't received your response and we need to give the caterer a head count. Will you be joining us?" Despite any answer (yes OR no) from her, a simple response of "Thank you" and a good-bye of some sort. Then hang up the phone. End of story on that one.
Any other issues, have your husband deal with them. This one is cut-and-dry, you've been the bigger person already, continue that where you must, avoid it where you can.
On another note, have you talked to your future husband about this? You marry him, you marry his family. Best to hash it our before hand than deal with it for years to come. My fiance's brother and I had it out one night in their parents' house. I was not going to take the crap he was dishing out, and my fiance stood by my side. Stood with me, didn't need to open his mouth. Standing there proved he was on MY side. His parents were upset with me, that I had dared do such a thing, but in the end it worked out great. His brother and I get along better than ever (to the point where we hang out without my fiance or anyone), and his parents came to understand that HE was wrong, not me, and it needed to be done to straighten everything out.
2007-03-20 07:38:06 · answer #3 · answered by Just tryin' to help 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You can do either of four things - call her outright when the day of the responses being due is here and ask if she is coming, ask their mother if his sister intends to come, saying she hasn't had the courtesy to respond and you need to do the table assignments, 3rd assume she's not coming and plan away or 4th assume she is coming, incurring a possibly unneeded expense at the reception. Since it is his sister your husband should have a good idea of what's going on, ask his opinon. Good luck and God Bless
2007-03-20 07:33:57 · answer #4 · answered by tersey562 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Deal with it now. It's not going to get any better. My brother in law, who was our best man, signed our marriage license, and who hasn't had that much contact with us in the four years we were married...certainly nothing negative..just up and "uninvited" us to the family Christmas this past year. His sister just flat out refused to stand up.
Now, why did his brother go through the motions of signing the license if if was this animate about not liking me and never accepting me into the family? We're ready to adopt, and his wife will look at his sister with the baby and say real cutesy "Ask Auntie for a cousin." Family is the only thing we fight about. I can't stand it.
2007-03-20 07:46:11 · answer #5 · answered by Gabby_Gabby_Purrsalot 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
once you're specific your fiance would not concepts with the exception of her, then i might say you have the perfect excuse: basically the satisfied couple and their mom and father. With this small a collection, even one guy or woman can exchange the dynamics, and there's a few thing specific in basically having the mum and father. So I see no longer something incorrect with this. that's no longer an exclusion of her...that's an inclusion of basically the mum and father.
2016-10-02 11:12:05 · answer #6 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe she's had lots to do. Maybe she's already told her brother that she will be coming and doesn't think she needs to respond twice. Stop looking for trouble - it's no wonder the two of you don't get along if you're such a stress-head. Get your fiance to ring his sister and ask her, or invite them round for a meal and casually ask her then - kill two birds with one stone, make a bit of an effort with her and find out about the wedding.
2007-03-20 07:35:27 · answer #7 · answered by Alex 5 · 0⤊ 3⤋
Two tears, you sent her an invite so the ball is in her court.
I don't like my brother's wife either, she didn't invite any of my brother's family to their wedding. So she will always be an outsider as our family is concerned. We acknowledge her but she's just a person that lives with my brother until they divorce which is imminent.
2007-03-20 07:31:01 · answer #8 · answered by Yvonne 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Why wasn't she asked to be in the wedding? Perhaps this "oversite" has hurt her feelings and she thinks you don't like her. Even if you don't get along, you can offer her an "olive branch" by asking her to be an important part of your special day. Remember, its just one day, but a lifetime of getting along!
2007-03-20 08:30:17 · answer #9 · answered by JennyP 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I had the same problem... Sucks, doesnt it? My sister in law claimed that she didnt want to take time off work to come to our wedding (she said it was a waste of vacation time). She ended up coming and being miserable the whole time.
But anyways, I'd talk to your husband. Hopefully she'll come around and not be so miserable.
2007-03-20 07:27:51 · answer #10 · answered by Emily 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋