My friend gave me a bag of clothes that she said were too small for her. I took them. Over the trime, I wore some and gave some away. Three years later, she says that she only lent me the clothes and wants them back. I am offended by this turn of events and by her representing the passing on of second hand clothes which I did not ask for or need as a loan.
I have returned all of the clothes. But I should raise the issue with her or just leave it alone?
2007-03-20 07:03:55 · 18 answers · asked by Emmeline M 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
Make a mental note to yourself that you will not take anything material from this person again. Lesson learned, now let it go.
Holding on to it will only slow you down.
2007-03-20 07:14:51 · answer #1 · answered by Gloria 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
What did you say to her when you returned the clothing? I probably would have told her as I handed her back the bag that I hope she would not be offended that after the length of time in which you had possession of the clothes, that you accepted them thinking they were yours. Maybe you could have told her that in your experience, no one 'ever' asked for their clothes back. (How was anyone to know she would be in the process of loosing weight?) On the other hand, just 'because", I might have told her in this way: "Girl, after three years, I KNOW you didn't expect me to still have all those things!" I'm sorry, I have passed some of them on - just as you did. " Girl, after three years, she must really be something kinda of 'off' to think that you'd still have every piece, or even feel the need to return them. I wonder what she would have said if you didn't have anything to give back!
2007-03-20 07:11:10 · answer #2 · answered by THE SINGER 7 · 5⤊ 0⤋
Tell her it's been 3 years and you have worn the clothes so often they are old, worn out and you don't even have some of them any more. Tell her you miss understood that the clothes were meant to be "borrowed". But, 3 years is a long time and there is nothing she can do about it now. She's being unreasonable. Why would she even want clothes that are 3 years old and probably out of style.
2007-03-20 07:33:24 · answer #3 · answered by Answer Girl 2007 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would raise it with her without a doubt. That is so wrong of her. She's an indian giver!!!!! 3 years is a really really long time to give someone something, then turn around and say no, I didn't give them to you, I LENT them to you, so I want them back.
You shouldn't be friends with someone like that. That's pretty thoughtless and puts you in a weird spot. Half the clothes I had 3 years ago are done for now! What is she expecting you to hold them for her and keep them perfect?? She should've done that herself then. Why don't you tell her since it wasn't a gift, you have to charge her storage fees and see how she likes it? lol!
2007-03-20 07:15:31 · answer #4 · answered by nymom 5 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I'd raise the issue a little bit, then just leave it alone. If she brings it up again, just say you gave me the clothes, and I did return them. Hopefully , you won't let something so small ruin a friendship.
2007-03-20 07:31:23 · answer #5 · answered by brooklyn152 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know what I would do put on a smiley face, go on a shopping spree, and have fun with a good friend, and show the new you.
Usually, when people lose weight they go buy new clothes, not wanting old clothes or baggage or a negative reminder of what they once were. Dump her as you did the old baggage.
2007-03-20 09:18:25 · answer #6 · answered by Born Valentine's Day 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This "friend" must have lost her mind with the weight. I guess if she wants to wear clothing that is not only OLD, but been worn by more than one person again, then its up to her. You were kind in returning the items..... I would have poured bleach on most of it before giving it back, just for making you go through the bother, but thats just my passive agressive side coming out....
2007-03-20 07:35:45 · answer #7 · answered by Sionainn 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
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2016-10-01 05:43:15 · answer #8 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
After three years I'd say those clothes were rightfully yours. A lot can happen in that amount of time. But since you already gave them back there's not much you can do about it now. I wouldn't be accepting anything else she "lends" you from now on.
2007-03-20 07:08:49 · answer #9 · answered by *Cara* 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Well, if she didn't specify she was just lending them to you when she handed them over, then it's her own fault. You can't give someone something then want it back in 3 years!(Unless you said I am LENDING this to you for now) I wouldn't have returned the clothes if I were you. Too bad for her.
2007-03-20 07:11:53 · answer #10 · answered by happyfacemommy 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋