Friends coming and going, calling as late as 3 am. She has been told not to have her boyfriend sleep over, but defies all house rules. Last weekend she bought so many bottles of booze and got wasted. I heard rumors that she also has been taking acid, estacey, and some cocaine. My question is, to all you parents of teens, would you trust this young girl with your house and all your posessions? Please no smart answers from the teenagers, cause I want parents of teens' opinions. Any suggestions? This is a tough decision, cause we love her, but we are worried about getting ripped off for our possessions.Should we tell her to move out, or take a chance on her. It might be like closing the door after the horse is gone, if we take a chance. She has a job, so its not like she is a dead beat. I just don't no which way to turn. I am just so worried and upset over this. I must leave town for 3 months. Please what would you do if you were me.. Thankyou..
2007-03-20 06:36:04 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
If you read your question I think you will find that you already have your answer. If she defies all house rules when you are there, imagine what she'll do when you aren't. I think it's time for a little tough love. At nineteen, if she can't obey the rules of your house, she needs to find her own. And if she has an addiction problem, she will never seek help until she hits bottom. I definitely would not leave her alone in my house for 3 mos.
2007-03-20 06:59:01 · answer #1 · answered by Sharon M 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't think leaving her in charge for three months would be a good idea. I'm pushing 30 but I moved out of my folks' at 17, partly because my Dad was too strict and I did not share his views on many things. Living on her own will help her mature. You say she's 19 but the way you describe her antics, she sounds 15. Overdue for some growing up, I'd say. Be there for her and help her out, but definitely tell her to hit the road.
2007-03-20 07:08:02 · answer #2 · answered by Jon H 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I personaly think that if you are living with your parents house then you obey thier rules. I know she is your daughter but it's called tough love. You say she has a job, then tell her to move out and do what she pleases at her own place, not under your roof. I honestly would not trust her, if there isn't anything else you can do, then hide all your possesions lock the room to your bedroom etc. Good Luck with this one. God Bless
2007-03-20 06:44:26 · answer #3 · answered by Shorty06 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Move her out right away. Pack her things and give her 3 days to find a place. Then, change all your locks, codes, etc. and line up someone reliable for the time you'll be gone. After your return you can see if her lifestyle improved and give her another chance to be part of your household. It sounds harsh, but I've watched kids turn their lives around when they HAVE to.
2007-03-20 07:06:25 · answer #4 · answered by franklyn 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The answer is No.
But you you sound concerned for the girl - you need help her out and helping yourself are two different things. Yes have all read mythological stories which teach us to help people out, even at personal expense. But then , we have read even more news stories where people were really duped by girls and boys like these.
Hence my recommendation would be this -
a. Do not let her stay in your house any more.
b. Contact a NGO which deals with drug abuse and rehab ( I know Sahara in Delhi http://www.saharahouse.org) and leave the rest to them.
There is so much you can do. Remember - its good to be the one who throws the rope down the cliff to save someone - but being the rope is never easy.
2007-03-20 06:52:53 · answer #5 · answered by con_cer_earned 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
definatly find someone else. If you are having uneasy feelings and you are still here. Just imagine how you will feel for 3 months and you are not around. Their are good teenagers out their. Go to a church and ask if someone would know of someone needing a job. An easy job at that. Good luck.
2007-03-20 07:39:53 · answer #6 · answered by hascht2 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As a parent, I'd tell her I worked for my house and I'll be damned if I let her or anyone else tear it up and don't be getting any funny ideas about staying in my house especially when I'm not there.
2007-03-20 07:19:52 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She has already demonstrated that she is not worthy of trust. You let her run wild for three months and you won't have a house to come back to.
Right now, as difficult as it is, kicking her out is the best thing for both of you.
2007-03-20 06:41:10 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
i would have her moved out long before now. and no she should not be trusted. she already defies you with her boyfriend and the drinking and the drugs. for peace of mind, she needs to leave before you go out of town for 3 months. good luck.
2007-03-20 06:48:47 · answer #9 · answered by lynnie 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Do not allow this person to stay in your house while you are gone. In fact change the locks before you go.
2007-03-20 07:11:33 · answer #10 · answered by Poppet 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋