How can I be assertive without threatening people?

Question

I have been an administrative assistant for about a year now and am getting increasingly irritated with people because they seem to think I am here to spoonfeed them. A salesrep goes on a trip, I e-mail them their itinerary, and then they call me from the airport asking what terminal and flight.This happens frequently with the shop too. I print, for example, stickers and then they throw them away and expect me to print more next time they ship that item. With the companies, I deal with, it is frequently a "who me??" response I get and the runaround. If I go apeship on them, they give me some pious response like Why are you such a jerk when I am just doing my job?Being nice to people seems to be an invitation to let them walk all over you and assertive seems like just a different word for aggressive becasue they don't seem to get it unless you threaten them and then follow through with torture.

Answer 1

I sympathise. It is hard to draw the line between assertion and aggression sometimes. But when you work with people you have to make allowances all the time and continue to be pleasant, even when some people will inevitably see kindness as weakness. I hope this link will help. http://www.psychjourney.com/Guideline%20to%20Aggresson%20&%20Assertion.htm

Answer 2

First, try not to let your irritability show. Maybe you can handle some people so they won't bother you again unless it is necessary.
The itinerary that got misplaced is so easy to do and maybe that person hated to call and ask. But, try to see how they were feeling at the airport and not knowing which terminal and flight.
When it comes to printing stickers, etc. Ask nicely when you deliver them, to please hold on to extras for a while for next deliveries. We are short handed in the printing dept. (if permissible to say). Or if you know they will call back for more stickers, have some extras made up already and just send them on. It may be a problem to keep them filed to where you can find them.
Maybe, you could come up with some short cut ways to handle the many requests in a way that you are sort of ready for them. There may have to be some request that you won't be able to do. If they misplace the printing labels; is that something that they can improvise with on their end?
Last but not least, try to always give them the attitude that you are more than happy to help them. You've heard to old saying, "Kill them with kindness.", even though sometimes it may hurt. It will make you look good. If they think you don't really mind, maybe they won't bother you as often.

Answer 3

You're the assistant which means that you have to pick up the ball when they drop it. It's just the way corporate America is. All administrative assistants have to go through the same thing. It's not really your place to tell someone to stop screwing up. It's not good for your job either. Just suck up and do your job. You're getting a paycheck and that's all that really matters. Unless it's some extreme condition where you absolutely cannot work because of it, being assertive (in the way you're talking) may not be the best thing. Plus, you've only been there a year. You've still got to pay your dues. I've seen executive/administrative assistants get on their bosses' cases, but these gals have been there for 10+ years.

Answer 4

Seems like there is a miss-fit between your working style and the company's culture. My feeling is that a single person's effort -- without support from authority-- is unlikely to turn the situation around soon.

You may want to adopt matter-of-fact kind of stance to avoid appearing to be personal. But before you can do so, you will first need to keep cool. The moment you allow them to get on your nerve, you already being personal and not objective.

Ever consider change job?

Answer 5

Come from the heart with your comments.
Ask what they could do to make your job and their job easier as well as how you can help out. Then follow through with what you have decided together.

Each life lesson for you is to become unconditionally happy.

When I say come from your heart I mean put your attention on your physical heart when you are contempalting what to do and also when you are talking with them.

Answer 6

tell him that that's out of your administration, that's not your duty to do in spite of is tousled. then tell him if he elements the potential to regulate in spite of is screwed up you'll make certain it would not save going on. that's one way, yet what i'd do is, even if that's some thing that he's screwing up, i'd basically bypass over his head to his boss and *****. careful the way you bypass about doing the 2d one inspite of the actuality that, relying on how that corporation is administered it may basically make you boss even more beneficial of a prick.

Answer 7

unfortunately, kindness (and guidance) is seen as weakness.
kind of like when u ask "how r u?" some ppl understand this question as an act of concern and care & will actually tell u how they're doing, others (most actually!) feel this is a direct invasion of their privacy! how they're feeling is none of your dam* business!!