but my mum wont let me :( how can i convince her to let me have one??? im 16 btw (17 in may) and i am not immature and im pretty sure id be able to cope with the emotional side of it...i feel like im ready for one..... :( how come my mum cant see that her not letting me have one is upsetting me more than one dumping me???
2007-03-20 03:42:51 · 7 answers · asked by the nice girl 23 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I was there. My mom was so strict when I was a teenager and I didn't do a lot in high school - parties, the mall, boyfriends, etc. I'm 30 now, but I can offer advice on how I got around things.
I think the best thing for you to do is to "technically" obey her. So you can't stamp the word boyfriend on a relationship. You can still like a guy and talk to him at lunch or on the phone. You can still develop a meaningful relationship with him and allow him to get to know you better. With parents, it's all about labels. But just go with your feelings and get to know him better. You should become a better person from it. If you go to the mall with your best friend, have him and his friend "coincidently" meet you there. Group gatherings are alternatives to dates. If there's a dance and he wants you to go, show up alone (in the name of satisfying your mother) and join him inside. Sure there won't be a lot of private time, but what I also learned was that private time gets girls in trouble. Most girls that got private time with their boyfriends got pregnant or worse, STD's.
There are things that your mom is right about that you're probably not ready for. But hanging out with someone and getting to know them is harmless. If you resort to lying or sneaking around or doing things that directly disobey your mother's wishes, then that's not healthy. Try to stick to the rules, and yet be creative with them. Good luck!
2007-03-20 04:38:47 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know it's hard; both to be mom and a daughter. Have you tried the group date approach. Maybe a few couples could go to a movie or a fair or something. You need to show her that you are mature enough for a boyfriend. Try truly talking to her about it without attitude or anger. See if you can find out why she feels this way and then maybe you can show her or convince her that you can handle a boyfriend and that you will be careful. I'm sure she is just concerned about your health and safety and is not trying to make you miserable. Hopefully she will come around is she sees that it is important to you and you are acting responsible about the whole idea. Good Luck
2007-03-20 11:05:18 · answer #2 · answered by K L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My mom told me I wasn't allowed to date while living in her home. I brought home male friends (but not boyfriends) all the time though. At some point (age 15) there was one I really liked, and she liked him too. Suddenly the rule was gone.
2007-03-20 11:05:40 · answer #3 · answered by imjustasteph 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The worst fear of all parent is to see their child growing up, or seeing her with a guy on a date and things like that. You have to your mom time she just need to get use to the idea.
2007-03-20 11:02:12 · answer #4 · answered by Tummy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
to be honest mom loves you and she is worried that you might make a mistake that could cost you and her in the long run. Don't worry she will come a round just don't push so hard.
2007-03-20 10:51:47 · answer #5 · answered by loving U 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your mum is trying to protect you as long as she can. My guess is: she doesn't want you to get hurt, contract STDs, have a baby out of wedlock, or disrupt your education.
2007-03-20 10:55:35 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
for sure your mom knows what's best for you. don't disobey her and try to understand.
2007-03-20 10:56:00 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋