I've decided not to tell her how I feel, It won't change anything, I think?

Question

My mom said when she was younger, there were boys she just didn't want to talk to anymore for no reason, just like the girl I fell in love with and can't seem to let go. She also said this boy told her how he felt about her and she still didn't want to talk to him. So I'm not going to tell this girl how I feel about her because I it won't work. It's just that today I saw her talking, touching and playing with other boys and even though it don't mean nothing except she likes them in a slightly-more-than-friends but-still-not-boyfriend kind of way, it still gets to me because I'm not one of the boys she's flirting with. I can't get her off my mind. I saw her sneak at least 2 looks in my direction though (and it's one of several times I've caught her on separate occasions). I keep asking myself "She never liked you like you liked her, she told you she doesn't want to talk to you anymore, why don't you just forget her? The answer keeps coming back, "Because I miss her and I love her."

Two sides of me are telling me to try because I love her and the other is saying there must be a good reason for my benefit she's gone and let her stay gone. What happened between us was I've liked her since I was 15 and she was 15, when we met, and 4 months into the year 2006 (we were both 16) we talked but after that I did something by mistake, she got mad at me, and I gave her space. When I tried to talk to her she said she didn't want to talk to me anymore. I've tried to move on but I feel like I need her friendship back. Could I have given her too much space (a month and a half), to where she'd think I must not care since I didn't try my hardest to get her back, and that's why she said she doesn't want to talk to me anymore. By the way, when I talked to her online after that about it, she always responded when I said something. Sometimes it seems like she may want to talk to me, and maybe if I just start a casual conversation (instead of saying how I feel) it could work out.

I have the strangest feeling (or delusion, or soon to be dashed hope) that she may want to talk to me if I just be myself to her and act confident and unafraid she won't talk to me, you know, almost like I don't care. We haven't talked for 11 months as of today because I been to scared to just approach her directly. We were only friends before, and that's all I want back.

Answer 1

Hey, you sound alot like me! Theres this guy i have known for ages about 3 years. He knew i liked him coz i told him, and because of circumstances we dont see each other or talk anymore. I havnt seen him for 6 months. Its hard to get someone that you have feelings for out of your head, i know. Why dont you send her an email just telling her you miss her friendship and nothing else.Theres that saying, "if you love someone set them free.If they come back their yours forever, if they dont, it wasnt ment to be"I know its hard but time is a great healer.Get out and find some new friends, widen your circle.Hey she might even see you being happy and think "what the hell was i thinking"Also you dont know what she is thinking, only she knows that! Give her some space.
good luck, and keep smiling. x