2007-03-20 01:12:50 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
Wanna hear a dirty joke, three pigs jump in a mud puddle
Wanna hear a clean joke, three pigs took a bath
2007-03-20 01:15:27 · answer #1 · answered by Bizzaregrl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Man goes to the patent office, says he has three new inventions. He shows the clerk the plans for the first invention, "It's a small bottle that holds liquids, and when it's empty, you can fold it up and put it in your pocket, it's a folding bottle, I call it a Fottle." The clerk smiles and nods, asks for the next invention.
He shows the clerk another set of plans, "It's a little bit larger, it's a carton that holds liquids and when it's empty, you can fold it up as well. It's a folding carton, I call it a Farton." The clerk says, "Nice idea, but I don't care for the name."
"Oh, well then you definitely won't like the folding bucket."
2007-03-20 08:21:19 · answer #2 · answered by CaliDoc 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The Voodoo Dildo
There was a man that wanted to get a nice present for his wife.So he walks into a store and sees something on the top shelf but it didn't have a price tag.The man picks it up and asks how much it is.The other person says I'm sorry but I can't sell that to you sir.The man pulls out a gun and says "Give me that dildo" The man takes the dildo and runs off.
When he gets home he puts it in the shower and tells his wife there's a surprise in there for her so she goes to take a shower.After she found the dildo she stuck it into her *****. When she tried to take it out it wouldn't move.Then she saw that on the side it said Voodoo Dildo.So she tries to run to the car and then a cop pulls her over and asks what the problem was. She said I have a voodoo dildo in my *****.The cop says voodoo dildo my ***.The voodoo dildo went strait up his *** and the woman drove off.
2007-03-20 09:19:51 · answer #3 · answered by Tara 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
here are some short ones for you, enjoy
Two men met while both where looking for their lost wives.
1st: How does yours look like?
2nd: She is 5"7, 36-24-36, Fair, Black eyes. What about
Yours?
1st: Forget mine. Lets find yours!!
**********
Man comes home, finds his wife with his friend in bed.
He shoots his friend to death.
Wife says, "If you behave like this, you will lose ALL
Your friends".
**********
What is the definition of Mistress?
Someone between the Mister and Mattress
**********
Husband asks , "Do u know the meaning of WIFE??Without
Information Fighting Everytime"
Wife replies," No, It means , With Idiot For Ever !!!"
**********
Sons asks difference between confidence and confidential
Dad says,''You are my son, I'm confident. Your friend is
Also my son,that's confidential! ''
**********
Mother to her teenage daughter: I think this is the right
Time we should talk about sex.
Daughter (Excitingly) : Sure mom, tell me what do you want
To know.
Mother Faints...
2007-03-20 09:00:53 · answer #4 · answered by Stargate 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You know that wee boy of 14 stone?well his faverout musical instrument at school is the dinner bell.
2007-03-20 08:18:03 · answer #5 · answered by gary r 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what is the difference between ET and a man?
ET phoned home
what is a man's idea of helping with the housework?
Lifting his legs while U vaccuum
2007-03-20 08:15:45 · answer #6 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
A very ugly woman walks into Wal-Mart with her two kids. The Wal-Mart greeter asks, "Are they twins?" The ugly woman says, "No, he's 9 and she's 7. Why? Do you think they really look alike?" "No," replies the greeter. "I just can't believe you got laid twice."
2007-03-20 08:22:22 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
James R, you are a bad man. but I like you
2007-03-20 10:56:51 · answer #8 · answered by markhatter 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Taras voodoo dildo is a long joke .....just like the dildo....
2007-03-23 12:25:40 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
why are there bones on the moon.
cause the cow did not make it
2007-03-20 08:16:17 · answer #10 · answered by Elvis 109 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋