is it normal for my 6 nearly 7 year old still has screaming fits on the way to school.today it was coz she had

Question

the wrong purse,then she screamed over a skipping rope[shed forgeten it]also she wont dress herself is this normal or not????????????

Answer 1

Unfortunately yes, I think it is. My six year old is similar, except its usually crying rather than screaming over every conceivable thing. I sought some professional advice about it, and the response was that it is considered "within the normal range of behaviour". I was given the following professional advice to try to reduce the instance of it happening:-

1) Tell your child that you know he/she'd like to stop this behaviour, but you know its hard for him/her so you're going to help.

2) Tell him/her that every time she feels the crying (anger, in your child's case maybe) about to start, she is going to agree to first stop, take three deep breaths in and out, count up to ten slowly out loud and then have a drink of water.

3) Make a star chart, dividing the day into morning, afternoon and evening, and give a star plus lots of praise for each time they successfully manage to do the breathing / counting / drinking thing.

4) Set a low target at first (say, 8 stars in a week) and then give a choice of a small reward, like staying up half an hour later, or going out for pizza, when they achieve it.

At first, you have to remind your child all the time of what they've agreed to do, and do it with them, because the crying/screaming thing is so much of a habit they will forget. If the screaming does still happen, you are meant to ignore them completely until it stops, and then say something like "good, I'm glad you've stopped, now we can do something fun together". What you're aiming for is to completely ignore the unwanted behaviour (the screaming) and praise any desirable behaviour loads.

I must admit that we struggled with all this, because it is really difficult to try to "gently remind" your child what they agreed to do when you are in a shop and they are crying loud enough to burst your eardrums! But I've been persevering with it for about a month now, and although it hasn't stopped the problem completely, things are improved. I found it helpful to speak to my child's teacher and tell her what I was trying to achieve as well.

I'm not saying its easy, but I hope this might help you a little bit.

Answer 2

This is not normal for most children, but some children have dissorders that cause them to be that way, and in some cases the parent is unsure how to discipline the child on the matter, or their methods are just not working.

I am not calling you a bad parent. I myself had trouble understanding my on child and for a while he was getting away with murder, but he does have Autism, and that made it even more difficult to help him.

Try making getting dressed and being ready on time a game. Try not to show the fact that you are at your witts end. If she is having trouble remembering things or making choices then narrow her choices. Make a morning schedule and reward her for the things that she accomplishes and if every thing on the list is accomplished all week, including no crying when she forgets something then she gets something bigger such as game time well actually anything of your choice. Just don't make it to elaborate. She may expect it every time.

If you have tried everything you know and you cannot figure it out, it might be safe to say that there is something a miss an you need to seek out help.

The not being able to dress herself is not normal at all and that needs to be look into. It could be stubborness, but usually children her age are all about doing things themselves. Even my son at age seven likes to dress himself and serve himself drinks. He likes to work dvd player and play on the computer, and he does have a developemental delay.

What ever you do, don't let anyone tell you that you are being a bad parent. People don't know what you are truely dealing with, and how long the child has been this way, and they don't know what you have tried thus far. It is not for me to judge your parenting skills and I would not like it if you judged mine.

Good luck, I hope I said something that helps.

Answer 3

This happens all the time to parents all over the world. Don't concern yourself with what is "normal" - there is actually no such thing. It is normal for her right now, but it can change. Don't let people tell you that you're a bad parent. It's amazing how many people without children will tell you the child is spoiled.

I think this is more about school refusal that she doesn't know how to articulate to you. Something or someone at school may be bothering her. My son refused to go in and we eventually spoke with the school guidance counselor who helped us get into school in the morning w/o too much drama. Maybe she trouble with transitions. Many kids, like my son, have a mild form of autism called "asperger syndrome" and they react to transitions with crying, yelling, anxiety. She may also have separation anxiety.

Speak with your pediatrician, your school guidance counselor, and then try to make some time for yourself to do something you love so this isn't the focus of your whole life. You matter too. Good luck.

Answer 4

Sounds like she is used to getting what she wants when she wants it. My son is almost 7. She absolutely should be dressing herself. You need to modify your morning routine. Maybe make her a checklist, she can help you. Talk about what needs to be done everyday. She can color it also. Get her excited about it...Eat breakfast, put on clothes, fix hair, brush teeth, check backback for homework, other items she needs to bring to school. The rule is if we forget it, too bad you can take it tomorrow. She needs more responsibilities. You can give her a sticker or smiley face by each item she successfully completes or a frowny face if she does not, or a point system. You can help her with the list the first couple of weeks. I know there is a lot to do in the morning and it is hard to add one more thing to keep up with but you will be glad once she starts completing the list on her own.

Answer 5

Time for a change.

We have found the reward system to be very effective and motivating good behaviors.
Keeping a calender of smiles and after a weeks worth or more... a small reward is given (( like dressing in the morning possibly a new Hair Ribbon or Bobby-Pins. Brushing teeth w/out a reminder, New Toothbrush or Flavored Toothpaste.))

Misbehaving would have "consequence" after 2 warnings.

Gentle reminders, of proper use of inside voice, may help her to calm down, before it escalates into a full fit.

Answer 6

No, but I also babysit a 7 year old that goes right of the deep end if she doesn't get her way. It took me one week to follow the rules at my house. But the way her mother handles her I would not want to be around when she grows up. She hits her mother spits on her. lays down on the floor and screams. She won't go to bed at her bed time so they pop in a movie so she can go to sleep, she stays up till 12:00 or later and wonder way she cranky getting her up for school. You need to come up with some rules and stick to them. Nip this right in the bud. Maybe if you let her pick out her outfits the night before and lay them out and tell her she is to get dressed herself. If not she looses something that she likes. When she throws a fit in time out and looses something. My sister uses a behavior chart with certian things done she gets a star, she throws a fit talks back loses a star. End of the week she gets a small reward. Good luck to you

Answer 7

No i doesn't be embarrassed. i'd attempt to take my daughter to the rest room, in spite of if that meant getting off the prepare on the subsequent end. If she ought to attend an hour (in view that she screamed that lengthy) she likely had to take a depraved sh*t. The cramps and rigidity ought to were to a lot for her little body. ==== If my daughter is throwing a tantrum I definitely don't have any difficulty reprimanding her and eliminating her from the area if favor (I attempt talking flippantly to her first to dis-fuse the placement yet 2 years olds are not be conscious of for his or her staying power or verbal change qualifications). often times even if, like in case your stuck on a prepare you fairly don't have any ideas.

Answer 8

Unfortunately my 7 years old, use to have similar episodes, sometimes it would be because i woke him up the wrong way in the morning, the bad mood, involving shouting, screaming and slamming things ended when we arrived in tears and very frustrated at school. I stopped all fast foods and only allow him food i have made, also i have stopped all fizzy drinks and cordial. I have also adapted a bedtime ritual as before i could never get him to bed. He has his own alarm clock now, and gets up no problem. its not normal but it can be resovled.

Answer 9

You sound alot like me, my 8 year old twins still try and do the same things to me. I realized I was #1 doing too much for them, when they can now do alot for themselves, if the kids can use a computer they can certainley dress themselves and #2 I was letting them away with alot thinking it was easier for myself when in actuality I was being lazy and in reality it was making it harder for myself. Now when the kids take a fit, they get reminded they are 8, not 2 or 3 and then they are sent to their room till they can calm down and truly be sorry.

Answer 10

Normal... yes, and no. Yes because all kids lash out differently. No, because she's probably stressed and not talking to you about something. Maybe as simple as another kid in school picking on her. My daughter does the same stuff and honestly 9 times out of 10 its a reaction to something else. Or she's tired. (Mine also has ADD so keep that in mind also) She is 7 going on 8. I try to sit down with her alone and talk to her. She also has a journal that is PRIVATE. Even I don't look in it. Best to you.