Iv been dating my man for close to a year now....The thing is we are always fighting over anything and everything.We have never gone a week without a fight that lasts a week lol!! Serious,then we make up for the weekend-and as fast as you can say fight we are back at it. I don't know what to do but I love him so much...Though this is taking a toll on me. I fear i might end up hating him.
2007-03-19 19:39:14 · 8 answers · asked by Angel 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
My boyfriend's mother told me something I will never forget, and it has always helped me. "If you fight about everything chances are you are fighting about nothing". I think about that when ever we start to bicker and it makes me stop and think. It really is nothing....no need to fight.
2007-03-19 19:47:20 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not healthy to be in a relationship where you fight all the time. If you are fighting about anything and everything, maybe you should take a break from each other...go a week without seeing each other and see how it goes. Some guys just like to argue so it might be best not to see each other for a week. It will remind the 2 of you why you love each other
2007-03-20 02:44:37 · answer #2 · answered by sellersatc 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can try some ground rules about disagreements. First, no yelling, then you must stay on topic and stay calm. If there is yelling, then the ground rules must be that you separate for a while. No cussing, no name-calling, no disregard for the other's feelings.
Sounds like you both need to learn how to disagree, the only reason it could go on and on like that is if it goes off-topic a lot. In the end, the best thing to do if there is no resolution, is to agree to disagree.
You also have to take in consideration both of your personalities and mental status. For example, my ex-boyfriend and I used to argue all the time when we first went out. He would initially seem very happy and hyper and then it would evolve to picking fights with me. Eventually I just learned to leave or go do something because in his state of mind at that time, all he wanted to do was argue. Later on, it was brought to my attention that he was using drugs to self medicate himself. Once I said no drugs or get lost, he quit and now we dont argue, we disagree, but there is no yelling or belittling anymore.
A long, long time ago, my exhusband told the therapist that he thought I didnt care anymore since I refused to argue with him... you never know what the deal is on either side till you really look at what the feelings are beneath the surface - not what is actually being said.
Ask him what he feels (NOT thinks...) when you are fighting. Ask yourself the same thing. Did either of you have parents that fought all the time?
In the end, you cant go on like this and eventually it has to stop one way or another.
2007-03-20 02:55:29 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've been dating my guy for nearly a year too. And I can't stand fighting with him, but we do it all the time too. I've dated several guys before him that I never fought with. So the fighting bothers me more because I know that you can have a healthy relationship without it. But, it doesn't bother him because he is used to the arguing and doesn't question the relationship every time we argue (I do question it every time). I know this doesn't help, but I thought I'd let you know that I'm in the same boat as you!
2007-03-20 02:47:46 · answer #4 · answered by Teresa 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you are both passionate people - either that or you are addicted to the drama.
Eventually you will have to choose what is important to you in life. The fighting will wear on you. The two of you love each other you need to find a better way to communmicate..
Try some counseling.
Here is a great book....it saved my saniety...
The Dance Of Anger
2007-03-20 02:53:40 · answer #5 · answered by clcalifornia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Frustration with understanding the other person, or not understanding them leads to tension. Tension can lead to arguments.
Are you friends with him?
By that I mean do you guys talk about anything and everything, like he is your best girl friend and you his best guy friend?
Arguments are usually filled with mean things meant to piss off the other person and make them hurt, things you wouldn't think of saying when your not angry about something.
Don't know if that helps, but it just helped me... I love my best friend and we talk about everything, yet we still get in arguments and fight.
Good luck to you!
2007-03-20 02:49:03 · answer #6 · answered by baldy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my advice is to end up your relation to that man if he don't want to understand you.. Or whose fault is it? Make things clear between you.. And start with a new way.. It is not good if you keep on fighting to each other.. What if your already committed to him? make things clear between you guys, try to understand each other...
2007-03-20 02:50:25 · answer #7 · answered by rhean s 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't possibly love someone like that! (That's "NOT" love!)
Get out now! Quit wasting what valuable time you have left in life, on this Earth!
Do you even know how many available great men there are out there... just waiting to meet "YOU"????
Why are you wasting your life away? - - - WHY!!!
2007-03-20 02:45:59 · answer #8 · answered by love_2b_curious 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋