Is trust really everything in a relationship?

Question

What if you and this person were together 2 years ago and he cheated by kissing another girl but told you as soon as it happen? Well we broke up a week or so after that, found out I was pregnant. Anyways we've been officially back together since August 2006 and I trust him but yet sometimes I see things like I think I'll see an hickie but it'll be nothing. I know I love this man, I'm just wondering is the fact that sometimes I want to know what he's doing when he leaves here mean I don't really love him. I know based on his actions that he's sincere but I'm so used to hearing about how all guys cheat and blah blah bla. I know for sure that I love this man, but in my past I've become so used to being this overly jealous not trusting anyone type of female and I fear that that person is causing problems. How do I let go of my old ways and move forward? Or are women just naturally jealous?

~I apologize for this being so long I could not exactly piece this together perfectly~

Answer 1

To generalise that all guys cheat is true.But there are exceptions as well. Looks like you have met a guy who simply is....an unsteady guy.But that does not mean you have to accept it.Think of what would happen if you did what he did.Love and trust are 2 totally different issues.I can love someone who i dont trust and vice versa.You see,love truly blinds one's judgement especially when something as serious as being pregnant happens.Then it begins to lean toward panic and desperation.
Therefore,being jealous and non-trusting is the correct response to what you have experienced.It is what almost everyone will experience.Moving on with or without him is entirely upto you.Trust is therefore a major player in a relationship.You will never be at peace if you dont trust and you will never be happy.
Being a guy,i have never cheated.To me,it is being unethical and unfair to the person you are with.I would never get over my girl friend cheating on me and therefore i dont expect her to get over it either.The generation of today are more incompatible and unsteady in relationships.Young people blindly trust before it's too late assuming that they are mature enough.What most of em dont know is that they are waiting to be screwed over around the corner.

Answer 2

I believe Trust is certainly the biggest key to a happy relationship. The fact that he was outright honest with you certainly gives him a little creditation but if you truely love someone would you even consider or let something like that happen? For me personally that is a key point to know that I can't be as happy with that person as what I'd believed. If a relationship is stong enough it will work through anything. When trust is defied, it can take time to heal...but nothing is impossible.

Answer 3

Women and men are both jealous.

In your situation, he told you right away, so it doesn't seem like trust should be an issue, except to say that you might not trust that he won't do it again. I don't think you have a reason to believe he would lie. It takes time to build trust again, and to believe what your eyes and ears are telling you, when in your heart you know you can't be sure. Sometimes our instincts are correct, sometimes we're too paranoid. When the evidence is lacking, it's best to go with trust.

Answer 4

Trust is one of the foundation of a marriage. I can't say much about your relationship but I can only hope that your marriage will last as there are many couple in the world having marriage problems and then they divorce which is a sad thing.

Answer 5

yes i think we are naturally jealous but that doesnt mean we cant learn to control it. for example have you ever sat down and told him how you are feeling and asked him what his day was like? you can learn a lot by just saying how was your day honey and seeing how he reacts. if he tells you about his day and asks how yours was then i wouldnt worry too much. if he sirts the question or gets defencive then you need to worry. just remember you took him back and you need to start somewhere on the trust thing. if it is too hard talk to a friend and ask her to help you figure out your feelings

Answer 6

You are a good person and trust is meant to be like this. You may have some difficulties and or upsetting scenarios but you would definitely be a winner in the end.

Take care, you are special!

Answer 7

Trust is one of the most important things in a relationship, but not the only thing. There is also communication

Answer 8

Trust is very important but not the sole element that makes a relationship work. Sometimes, you need to be "half-blinded", i.e. to see more about your partner's good points and forget and forgive about his bad points. Honesty is also important but too honest is blunt. E.g. guys want to go out and have beers themselves, but we may want them to go shopping with us..., therefore, if they really want to have fun they might need to lie in order not to hurt us... I don't endorse this but I understand them and want to give them more freedom. Jealous will ruin your relationship, trust him, love him as he is.

Answer 9

Nope. i think rational thought and what your heart say is more important... if you think and have proof that he might cheat you and your heart say yes to that, that should be enough to dump your partner in love.
on the contrary, if you don't have anything and your heart say he's not cheating you, then no matter what the people say, just trust him.
if they both telling you different, then you just have listen which do you trust, your heart or your thought.
the point is, trust no one but your self...

Answer 10

The past is that, the past move on. dont hold a grudge. But listen to your own insticts. Only date men you have mutual trust and respect.