I'm sitting here crying right now. I just instant messages a guy I used to talk to & he told me he's done with me. It really hurts because I have done everything for this guy and even been through everything with him, even a miscarriage. He wasnt even at the hospital with me. All my friends told me to stop talking to him, but I didnt. I tried the make him miss me thing and it didnt work, I gave in & thats when he basically said to leave him alone. I got back with my ex because I don't want to be alone, but I know thats not what I truly want..all my friends always say "you're so pretty", well if thats the case, why don't any guys ever talk to me. Ever! Its gotten to the point where I can't even focus on my school work & this school isnt cheap either! Can anyone please offer me helpful advice...i'm tired of crying and being depressed, and running back to my exes all the time. I just want to focus on myself...and I cant because I am dwelling on them all the time & i know they arent on me.
2007-03-19 17:34:53 · 15 answers · asked by ms ambitious 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Pray to God. He will give you the hope and strength that you truly need. He is always there for you.
God has a plan for you and will bring the RIGHT ONE in His time. Just have faith in Him.
Everything will be alright. I PROMISE. ♥
Let out all your tears. Vent to your family... vent to your friends.
They are there for you.
This may be harder than it seems... but realize that school is very important. Look ahead in the future and know how important it is. You don't want to look back and think, "Man. If only I did THIS in school." Everything will turn out alright.
You may feel that your present is so messed up right now.
But do you really want your future that way too?
2007-03-19 17:37:37 · answer #1 · answered by ( Kelly ) 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I feel ya sister. I have been there and done that, and still feel like I'm following the same path. It's funny that so many men will look at you, but when you want them to they don't. Don't stress, kick his sorry butt to the curb, and your exes too. You are important, and your needs are important. I hope you find someone who will be your everything as I wish you would do the same for me. I have been with the same guy for three years, and it isn't that great. I do everything for him, and I don't see anything in return. He just seems to want more and more, and it hurts. He hasn't kissed me in almost two years. He hasn't said I Love You in at least one. But I am still here, holding on to a dead dream, because I don't want to be alone. Everyone says I can have anyone I want, and all the guys can look at me all day, but that doesn't change the fact, that you can feel lonlier when you have someone then when you are actually alone. I find it hard to grasp why we try and hold on to things that we cannot change, but women sometimes think things will change. That men can change, if they want to. Sad thing is, they don't want to 90% of the time. I don't even know where our relationship is going. I really can
t help, but you are not alone. You will get better, but you have a heart, and thats what's gonna getcha everytime.
2007-03-20 00:46:47 · answer #2 · answered by Teveren P 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
#1 If it's over that's a good thing. Why limit yourself to one crappy guy. Think of it as a learning experience, now you know what kind of treatment you don't want.
#2 You need to be alone for awhile. Going from one person to the next doesn't cure loneliness it just keeps at bay for awhile. Until you can learn to be alone without being lonely it will always be there.
#3 Get in The F-Him girl mode. Make yourself angry. Think of revenge. But think of this revenge: Do Well.
Meaning, go work out and say to yourself, "I want him to see how well I'm doing and how good I look". Excel in everything you do. Success is the best form of revenge. Last, give off an air of ambivalence. Let him know that he did not crush you.
Then you'll be strong in body, mind and that will strengthen your spirit. Your defiance will burn him.
Cuz if there's one thing a man hates when he breaks up with a girl......That she just doesn't care.
2007-03-20 00:48:15 · answer #3 · answered by LaLa 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You should get this book called "He's just not that into you". I went through the same thing....i was with this guy for 2 and a half years and he treated me like crap also. We broke up 3 times and i finally told my self that i've had enough. I knew i was waaay too good for him....and that's what you should do also. If you know for a fact that you did alot of nice things for him then you should realize that you deserve the same. Think about it...Do you really want to be treated like that for the rest of your life if you and him so happen to get married?? Men in general like women who have a life, education and that are not so needy. I suggest that you move on with your life and never ever talk to any of your ex's. They're your ex for a reason! You should really get that book!!! It really helped me alot. Good Luck!!!!
2007-03-20 00:55:10 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The more you show him that you love him, the more he will push you away. Accept the fact that he does not love you anymore. Think that you are free now and you have nothing to do with him. You said you've been through a lot with him...even a miscarriage, now is the time to pick yourself up. Do not go to your ex because you will only feel used at the end considering that he is taking advantage of your depression right now. You are not depress because your boyfriend does not want you, you are depress because of rejection. You feel that you are worthless and you pity yourself. Focus on your study, prove to them that you are smart and you will be fine without them. Every time you think about that guy, tell yourself "nahhh...he does not think of me anyway. Why should I think about him?" You deserve somebody else who will value you.
2007-03-20 00:53:23 · answer #5 · answered by Masyaw 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to get yourself into some counseling, and probably put on some form of antidepression medication. You obviously have a very low opinion of your own self worth to put yourself through this stuff. And you're sure not doing this other guy any favors by using him because your sad, and depressed and just really need a friend to tell you things are gonna be okay. Not jumping from one guy to the other. And maybe you dont get guys to talk to you because you put out a vibe that you are not interested in anything they have to say.
It sounds to me like you need to get yourself lined out first before you even think that you need to be in a relationship. And you obviously dont choose people that respect or really care for you.
Listen to your friends, the ones that want nothing from you but your friendship. They are the ones that are gonna be honest with you. not some asshole who is just using you and will throw you away when he grows tired of you.
Best of luck
2007-03-20 00:45:26 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
HAY GIRL, GETTING OVER SOME ONE IS NEVER EASY
BUT BE STRONG, RUNNING BACK TO YR EX,ES ISNT THE ANSWER. BUT WHEN SOME ONE DOSN'T RESPECT U ENOUGH TO BE THERE FOR U, IT,S TIME TO MOVE ON. TRY DOING THE THINGS U LOVE TO DO, VOLENTEER SOME WHERE, TAKE TIME TO STRENGTHEN FAMILY TIES'' BEING ALONE ISNT EASY BUT IF U DON'T BREAK THIS CYCLE U WILL ALWAYS RUN BACK TO THE ONES THAT TREAT U LIKE SH-T'' IF U NEED SOME ONE TO TALK TO HERE IS MY E-MAIL ADD, MAYBE A NEW FRIEND CAN HELP trulovefrme@yahoo.com, lets talk
2007-03-20 00:44:50 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I hate to say it, but it seems like you lack self confidence. When you have to go back to the same guy that treats you like crap then your the one with the issue.. Insted of looking for a new guy, you need to look within yourself.
Remember its never about the person your with that makes you the way you are.. Its about YOU that makes you the way you are. I had to learn that the hard way... and through time i hope you learn it as well.
2007-03-20 00:42:44 · answer #8 · answered by -Dr. D 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
do u love the guy truly? if u do, u should know that to love someone doesnt mean that they'll treat u nicely. loving someone means u have to accept all that good and bad in him. so, if u really love him, carry on. i know he treats u like a crap, but dont get depressed. do something u like. pamper urself. go to the spa and just relax. think all good and nice things. remember, when ur heart is going to break, believe in ur heart that u are PERFECT.god make no mistake u know... well its just a thought. stoop crying ur heart out :)
2007-03-20 00:40:42 · answer #9 · answered by ctkm 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Let's begin this way; you are your own best friend. Learn to love yourself, to accept yourself as you are, without judgment. You are super. You are fantastic. Remember, if you can't learn to love yourself, how can you expect others to love you? So love yourself, honor yourself for the great and wonderful person you are. If you learn to love yourself then the choices you make will honor you. This fellow certaily has not honored you. So you honor yourself by leaving him alone. If you want to go "back" to somebody else, ask if that relationship will honor you? Be the kind of person you would like to have as as best friend. Your choices will begin to honor you. As you deserve.
2007-03-20 00:40:40 · answer #10 · answered by judgebill 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋