Would you let your teen daughter have her boyfriend sleep over for the night?

Question

Yes, same room, same bed.

Ladye221 and some others..thanks for your negativity, but it's NOT my daughter.

I'm just asking cause I know alot of parents that permit it and I wondered why someone would.

Beckeyc thx for your honesty. and lmao @ D_Bloc.

Answer 1

No, No, No, Did I say No?!!!!

Answer 2

I think this answer best depends on the circumstances... A.) How old is your daughter?? B.) Where does the boyfriend live? and C.) How much do you trust them? Believe it or not, not all teens are just interested in sex. I am 23 and my parents let me have boyfriends over to stay the night often. I think I was a junior in High School before they let a BF stay over. Usually they were allowed to stay over, but they had to sleep downstairs in the family room and I had to sleep upstairs in my bedroom. Then eventually, as I got older, we were allowed to sleep downstairs on the couch bed together. But we were NEVER allowed to sleep in my room and we weren't allowed in there with the door shut at any time. I was a good kid and my parents generally trusted me.

You don't have to allow your daughters BF to stay the night for them to have sex. If they want to do it, they will find places, wether you are home or not, at your house or his, or in a car or whatever... My parents would rather us be at our house then drinking or doing drugs... at least at home, they new we were safe.

Plus my mom always told me that when I started having sex, I needed to tell her and she would put me on the pill... and that's what I did. She was disappointed with me, but at least I was being smart about it.

So I guess as long as you trust your daughter to make good decisions, if the BF wants to stay the night... why not...

I'm 23 and started having sex when I was 16... I have no kids and no STD's... I think I turned out just fine!

Answer 3

As a 21 year old somewhat recently a teenager- I would strongly encourage you to NOT allow him to sleep over. Just by the question being presented to you, Id say theyre probably already sexually active, and theyre going to partake elsewhere if not your home.. but let that be her choice and :gulp: regret at such a young age- the more you can set a positive example and make the rights and wrongs clear, the more confidence you can allow yourself for raising her properly and exposing her to healthy choices. Good luck, and if all else fails.. offer her your lack of judgement and the safety that she can come to you with anything anything anything. If she does find herself in an uncomfortable position, the early you find out the more options everyone has- whatever the position may be.

Answer 4

Well aside from the fact I can't believe this question is being asked, let's start with the obvious: they are both underage, if under 18 years of age. What are the circumstances that merit this occurrence? If it is associated with a church or school activity that makes getting up in the morning easier/SAFER, then ONLY under the circumstances of both parents home and of course SEPARATE rooms.

A bedcheck would not be out of the question at some random hour, either.

Good to remember, this should be a rare occurrence under special circumstances only and MONITORED. You have a duty as a parent to keep your child SAFE - do no harm, provide no temptation(s) - RECOGNIZE, they are both underage and you could be liable if a sexual encounter occurs and/or, a resulting pregnancy.

Grace

Answer 5

That depends are you your child's parent of her bestfriend? Allowing her boyfriend to sleepover gives her a reputation. Now 50 years ago this was a bad thing today well how many teenage girls at your daughter's school are pregnent? If you think it's ok for your daughter to be considered easy by the guys at her school then by all means let him sleep over. Whether anything happens or not just the idea that something might happen is all it takes for every zit faced kid at her school to think he has a chance at the promised land. It may not happen this one time but chances are sooner or later you'll be a grandparent long before you or your daughter are ready for you to be one.

Answer 6

my mom would kill me if she found out that my (now ex) boyfriend were to stay the night. talk about my mom, my dad would go berserk and start ranting and raving. it all really depends on the age of the teen and whether or not they know about the birds and the bees. if and when i have kids (im only 16), i would allow my teens to have their bfs or gfs to stay the night as long as they stay in another room. i have a way of making sure that the door was not opened. the couch would be right next to my room so i would hear anything that goes on. i am a VERY light sleeper and if i hear the faintest little noise, i would open that door so fast, that the ppl's head would spin. so to answer ur question, no i would not let my teen daughter have her boyfriend sleep over for the night.

Answer 7

Really it depends on your daughter.

I'm 18, I have spent the night with my boyfriend, i have shared a bed with him, it was in my parents house, and guess what? I'm still a virgin, and I pride myself on this.

Just because you're two teens and you're dating, and you want to spend the night together, it doesn't mean you're going to have sex.

The only way to really judge this is talking to your daughter. Ask her straight out if she has had sex before. Yes, at first an awkward question to come by, but if she has a tantrum, or becomes suspicious, first of all she probably has had sex, and secondly it's definitely not time for her to spend the night with her boyfriend. You need to know what her plans are about sex, I know that might also sound wierd, but my mom knew that I was planning to stay a virgin until marriage, and so did my boyfriend.

Another thing to consider is how long have they been dating, I say anything less then 6 months is a no, just because that's what my mom said.

You have to stay on base with your daughter about all things, and if she's old/mature enough to stay right with you on all the above things mentioned, she's old enough to have him at least stay in the house, maybe not the same bed or room, but at least in the house.

But think about your daughter, it's a BIG deal. My mom knew she could trust me, I was a smart girl, got accepted into all of my colleges, and on a waiting list for one, I held two jobs, and I went to church every sunday, and wednesday for a bible night. I knew what I wanted, and I had priorities, pregnancy and sex not on that list.

Also, don't even just think about your daughter, think about her boyfriend. Mine had many characteristics I had, if you don't trust her boyfriend then it's a no.

It depends on how you think the situation will turn out, and what you can learn from your child and her boyfriend.

Maybe consider saying he can stay late, but he has to leave at such and such a time, and go upstairs and "sleep"- just read a book, or watch tv- "wake up" a little later than then to make sure he's out of the house, if he's not packing up and leaving or already gone, and he's basically planning to stay over, make it clear to your daughter that you gave them a rule and neither of them were mature or responsible enough to follow it, so the answer is no for the sleep over. And if things do work out, consider really talking to your daughter about it.

Answer 8

I know a parent that allowed her daughter and current beau to room together every once in a while....that mother is now the youngest grandparent I know.

So, I wouldn't allow it. I have a daughter and I trust her fully but it's the young man I wouldn't trust. And to be fair, I guess it could be the other way around too. The daughter could be the aggressor...so no. Too many variables of things that could go wrong.

This is a good question.

Answer 9

Why would a parent let this happen? As a parent, you're supposed to know what's right and what's wrong. When you let things like this happen, the child will think anything can go her way. You're supposed to set boundaries, so your child will follow your example. If the boyfriend was to spend the night, he was supposed to be in the living room under your parental supervision or parental oversight. A parent is supposed to watch his every move no matter how late it is. No, I would never let this happen to my daughter.

Answer 10

I'm having a hard time believing anyone would even consider asking this, but since you did.... I would tell my precious baby girl "Not happening". If she were to insult me with such a thoughtless request. (She would'nt - she knows what would happen) I would have a short, and to the point discussion with her boyfriend as to why would he give my precious baby girl such a selfish idea? (And probebly remind him that he does not want to find out how the Dr.'s would reattach his missing limbs) Yes... I am my kids Dad, no matter what! My daughter knows not to let boyfriends talk her into things, my son would not dare to dishonor a young lady in this way. No school like the old school!

Answer 11

No I would never allow that. Im pregnant now with a little girl and I will never allow a boy in her room period. Sleeping over or not. I was once a teenager and I know what goes on.
What kind of parent are you to even ask a question like that? You are condoning bad behavior and basically saying that it's ok for your daughter to have sex. What will you do if she gets pregnant? You need to get your head on straight and think about your daughters well being.