Please HELP, why am I so SCARED to FACE MY MOTHER?

Question

I am in college and live very far away from my family. About 3 months ago, I got a bad news from my mother, that she is diagnosed with a brain tumor. I have not seen my mother in a while and in a fews day im heading home for spring break. However everytime i think about facing my mother, i feel repelled and I dont want to meet her. I feel like staying in college because I dont want to meet her. Why am I so scared to meet my own mother?

Answer 1

Wow... I'm sorry ....

My advice.. is to go meet your Mom and face those fears... My Mom has been sick for the past year... she just had a surgery... and this Saturday they told her she had a tumor on her ovary.... and I'm here with her... I'm afraid as well... very afraid... I don't like to see her suffer like this... but I rather be there with her... you don't want to wait till it's too late... then you'll only have to face the "what if's"....

I know you love your Mom and you are afraid to see her... to see her sad.. to feel her inner pain... but I also know that your Mom would be happy to know that she has a daughter that is there for her... in good times and bad times... as sad as it can be... you don't want to wait till it might be too late... and let's hope that doesn't happen....

I put myself in your position because I feel i've been there... and I truly know how it feels... I hope she gets well...

Pray... ask God to help...
Be there for your Mother... she'll feel better

Answer 2

Because facing her, is facing the fact that she is sick. While you are so far away, it is easy to pretend that everything is the same. You are probably afraid of your reaction when you do see her. Don't worry, any reacton is okay. I mean, if you need to cry, or if you see her and get angry, thats all okay. You have to able to let those emotions out, and you should. Staying away is avoiding them, and you can't. Remember your mom will need you now, and it sounds to me like you really do need to be with her. When you get home, tell her how you were feeling, she'll help you work it out. I can't tell you that it will all be okay, but I can tell you that it will be easier once you see her for the first time. You haven't been there daily to face it, so in a way you have to catch up to where she and everyone else close to the situation already are. Go home, it will work out. You'll be so releaved that you did. Remember, she's still your mom, and everything you know about her is still the same. I bet she can't wait to see you. Have a nice Easter with your family, enjoy every minute, some things around home may be a little different, but you'll find most is still the same. Good luck, i'll say a prayer for you and your mom.

Answer 3

I think you might be scared because you are trying to figure out what you are going to say to her. A lot of people stay away from a bad situation because they just don't know what to say. Staying away just makes things worse. You have to face it head on. Its your mom, get home and talk with her, cry with her, pray with her, whatever you and your mom do or how you feel, do it together.
I have a friend that had a brain tumor, it was operable after radiation and she has been alive and well for 15 yrs now. Its not necessarily a death warrant. Just maybe she will survive this. I pray she does.

Answer 4

You are scared to face her afraid it will be your last time seeing her to where if you stay in college your mind thinks she will be around longer. Unfortunately that is not the case, if you don't go see her and something happens and she is GONE you will regret this last chance to see her and say anything that you need incase tommorrow never does come. TAKE THIS LAST OPPORTUNITY BEFORE IT IS TOO LATE. My best friend lost her mother at a young age, she was told her mom was just sick and she didn't want to go see her thinking it was just a cold, four days later her mom died and she is now 32 and regrets it till this day. She was 9 when her mom died. She never got to tell her mom how much she loved her and able to say goodbye.

Answer 5

You are scared becasue she has cancer.
My dad had a brain tumor.
It is ok to hug her and cry if you need to.
It is ok to be sad and upset that she is sick.
She would feel bad if you ignored the fact that she has a brain tumor.
Just give her your love and time. Then when back at college you will stay in contact with her.

You will regret it if you ignore her because she is sick.
Death and illness are part of life.
Please go see her and make the time with her good.

It would be very selfish for you to NOT go see her.

Answer 6

it rather isn't basic having a infant and elevating your infant on your man or woman with each and every of the expenditures, however the main suitable factor so which you would be able to do is attempt to get help out of your mom and tell her that it rather is significant that she maintains to be with you thru this entire adventure exceedingly reason you do not have the help of your boyfriend anymore. additionally, till now the infant comes, you ought to work out how lots you have stored and a stable activity that may assist you and your infant. additionally, make any residing preparations till now the infant is born so which you be attentive to once you get domicile at the same time with your infant, which you're in a stable residing atmosphere. Being a mom at 23 isn't basic yet people do it each and every of the time and you're able to do it too so don't be scared, you will make it with the aid of this. sturdy success!

Answer 7

When is the last time you saw her? If you haven't seen her in a long time, then this is normal anxiety. Plus, she is ill and this would make anyone nervous. Try to relax and make the best out of the visit. It sounds like you are just scared of what might happen. Reach out to her and have a good visit. You don't want to have any regrets down the line. Good luck.

Answer 8

You are afraid that shes going to die, and maybe in your mind, if you don't see her you won't have to deal with it.
Your mother needs you, just stop and think what she is dealing with. Your her daughter.
Think back, how many times has she been there for you. Who sat up at night, when you were ill. who made your dinner, cleaned your room, prepared you for where you are today. So take a big breathe, say a prayer and let her know you are there for her, because when shes gone, she will be gone forever.

Answer 9

You're trying to protect yourself from facing the situation. However, avoiding your mother isn't going to make her illness go away. I did that with a teacher to whom I was very close, because I didn't know how to deal with it and she died. I will always regret that I didn't visit her when she was sick. If it's hard for you, think of how hard it is for your mother. It's just one of those things you need to suck it up and do, no matter how difficult. If your mother does not make it, you could end up living with guilt for it the rest of your life.

Answer 10

You are afraid of losing her as you have always known her. She will likely look different and she will be different to you because you are aware of her mortality. Death is scarry for most people. It is the ultimate 'Fear of the Unknown'. You have to face your fears. You will Lose your mother someday regardless of if she beats the cancer. Everyone is mortal. We all die. You will die. I will die. She will die. Death is the price we all pay for living. Go to see her and face your fears. If she is terminal, spend every moment you can with her. Cherish it and make the most of it. Tell her how you feel about it. Tell her how you feel about her. For that matter always tell everyone you meet how you feel. Any moment may be your last or theirs. Life is totally uncertain. Live in the moment for the moment. Beleive in what is Real.