This is my moms 1st boyfriend since my parents split up (atleast i think it is) he seems like a pretty nice guy a bit of a suck up but seems like he might be a little genuinly nice. I just don't like him I've tried but when I see my mom put her arm around him I want to hit him in the head with a bag of change, tackle him to the ground and beat him until my hands hurt then kick him in the shins is this normal and how can I get over it
2007-03-19 16:19:11 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
The first one is always the hardest! I was 23 when my parents divorced, and when I saw my dad with his new girlfriend, I felt the same way you do! I think it was because she wasn't my mother. I knew my parents would never get back together, and didn't think they should, they are both better people away from each other, it was just that seeing him with another woman who was touching his hand, and pouring his coffee, wasn't normal. I truely wanted him to be happy, but as nice as she was, I found fault in her, because she wasn't going to be good enough for my dad. It was also hard to face how much everything was different at that point. It was a weirdness I just had to get over. But it did get easier with time. Give your moms friend a chance, who knows, you might like him. And remember that it is no disrespect to your dad if you do like him, you just want your mom to be happy. Your dad won't feel replaced. Chances are he'll be meeting someone too, if he hasn't already.
2007-03-19 17:32:56 · answer #1 · answered by anncinn 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You haven't got over or found a way to cope with the split up.He's not going away and your mom loves him.You seem to feel a since of loss I imagine like where do we go from here my parents are together x amount of times one minute now there kinda gone.All I can think to type is time heals all things and sometimes not.If it's bad enough some states have counseling programs available at a reduced rate.Where I live it's $10 a visit through county.
2007-03-19 19:34:34 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry you're having such a tough time.
It's perfectly normal for you to feel anger. Anger is part of the grieving process, which is:
Disbelief,
Denial,
Anger
Bargaining/Depression
Acceptance.
You are grieving the 'death' of your parent's marriage and what that means to you.
Try writing each heading on a paper, and then write down what that means to you in this circumstance.
It will help you to validate your feelings and help you to move on in time.
If you're still having a tough time, ask your mom to get you some counselling help.
All the best.
2007-03-19 16:43:37 · answer #3 · answered by concernedjean 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just think about your mom's happiness and don't make it all about yourself. Tell her how you feel and ask her what it is she likes about this new guy, and don't try to compare to your dad. It's not fair to your mom. He and she both deserve to be happy, they just couldn't be that way together.
If you need to, find a support group. It really will help to deal with the divorce issues.
2007-03-19 16:25:33 · answer #4 · answered by TNP Girl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont you want your momma to be happy? i mean if it were me I would want my mom to move on with her llife instead of doing nothing and being sad all of the time. Can you imagine your mom sad? wouldnt it make you feel bad? Dont just think of yourself in life. It is selfish. So it will some take some getting used to... your mom and this man... but why dont you try to take the time to get to know him. WHAT IF HE REALLY IS A GREAT GUY???? Dont knock him til you know him. Think of your mom on this one.
2007-03-19 16:43:23 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋