Why was it okay back in the day to whoop kids, but nowadays people are scared of there kids?

Question

Nowadays people are scared to spank their kids.........it was okay back in the days and I was whooped and have known many people who were spanked who turned out to be successful, happy, goal oriented people.

Answer 1

Because we want to raise a nation of sissies!

Answer 2

I was spanked as a child with a hand, belt and even had to go out and pick our own switchs. I am now 21 and I appreciate getting spanked and probably deserved it a little more. I have a 4 year old sister and I spank her. I also have a 4 week old daughter and when the time come i will also spank her. But I dont believe in a belt or the switch just my hand and only on teh backside. Ive seen people smack there kids upside there heads and thats cruel.

Answer 3

We had many debates on this subject in my psychology classes when I was an undergrad. I agree that there's a big difference between spanking and abuse. I've seen abuse. A few swift smacks on the bottom isn't abuse. While I personally think there are other options that are better, there are circumstances in which I think it's okay and a good idea to give a spanking, as long as it's done right.

As for people being afraid of it, there are two types. One is the type who is afraid that it's abuse and they'll get in trouble for it. I would guess that most people don't fall into this category, but they are out there.

The other type is the person who doesn't want to spank because they're afraid of the effects it has on the child. They're not really afraid of the child, they're more trying to prevent what they see as bad consequences. Like someone else said, making your child afraid of you, etc.

It also has to do with the philosophy of child-rearing changing. In the past, it was believed that spanking stopped bad behavior and was the best thing to do. Studies have shown recently that punishment of that sort really only keeps the child from doing the behavior in front of the parent. It doesn't stop it in general, or teach that it's wrong. It makes the child know that they will be punished if they're caught. There are other techniques and consequences for behavior that do a better job of teaching kids not only that certain behavior is unacceptable, but also to understand why. There is also an issue with parents not wanting to teach their children that violence is a way to solve a problem. For instance, if your son hits his sister, do you spank him as punishment? If so, what is he learning? That it's okay for you to hit but not for him? That sort of thinking is influencing this decision.

I'm not saying I think spanking is horrible and wrong. Like I said before, there are certain circumstances where a shock and a little pain is more memorable than other consequences. For instance, if a child runs out into the street, a spanking might keep them from doing it again. That's a very dangerous behavior and if it continues and you want to stop it, then I think a spanking could be good. I do, however, consider it more of a last resort.

I think it's important to remember here that there are alot of people who were spanked (myself included) who turned out successful, etc. Spanking in and of itself doesn't ruin a child. But it's also important to remember that there are plenty of children who were spanked who turned out to be unsuccessful, lazy, etc., much the same way their are children of parents who don't spank who turn out well and those who turn out poorly. There are parents who do nothing but spank their children, and I've personally known children who would misbehave because the spanking was the only attention they were ever given. So really, even if you agree with spanking, there is a right way and a wrong way to go about it, and good parenting goes far beyond whether or not you choose to spank.

Answer 4

The reason why is because there are the people that take SPANKING and ABUSE to be the same thing. There is a difference and people are so scared to get the cops called on them by the over-reactive mother/father that has "perfect" children and time out works for them or idle threats. I was spanked, and I will spank my kids. I spank my nieces and nephews, and my step-son when they act out and they have had their warnings or if what they have done is so bad that they don't deserve warnings. I even bite back when I've been bitten by my nieces and nephews. Needless to say they never bit anybody else again. Also, showing a kid by physical means is natural, look at nature. How does mama dog show puppy he's been bad? She grabs him by the scruff and puts him into submissive position. And guess what puppy either learns or mama bites harder.

Answer 5

I was spanked two times in my entire life. Once for running out in the middle of the road, and the second for showing my butt at K-Mart.

Have I ever done either since then, HELL NO! Mind you that I'm almost 25 now, but those were lessons I learned immediately after the spanking.

If I show my butt and keep asking, then talk back after being told no, I would get spanked. In public. For all the store to see. That stays with a person.

Answer 6

yea it's gotten out of control, people have gone from one extreme to another. a lot of it stems from parents who did not know what a spanking meant and it turned into a beating which is abuse.sometimes a kid needs the fear of GOD put into them, i can remember when my kids were young and i was always a single mom, i can remember when the "i am gonna turn you in for abuse " stigma started. a good old swat on the fanny never hurt anybody. i remember one of my kids telling me they were gonna call the police on me for giving them a spankin' i told them that if they wanted to call the police to go ahead but they might want to ask for an ambulance because by the time the police got there they would be abused! it was all a word play, put the fear into them by making them believe and help them realize that they are not abused, i hope this makes sense.

Answer 7

I was raised in the south where it was very popular for children to be sent to the yard to pick their own switch. I was NEVER whooped and I will never whip my own children. Whipping causes pain and teaches children that it is okay to hit someone if you feel they did something wrong. I turned out successful, happy, independent, and a good person. If "whooping" is so great and you have a right to have your own opinion then why is it that 85% of all violent criminals are products of parents that whooped them?

I also think that "back in the day" parents knew limitations and now a days there are so many people that take it to a new level that would constitute abuse. I also think whipping kids makes them fear you and I wouldnt ever want either of my children to fear me. And BOTH my children are very well behaved.

Angel you have every right to whoop your child, I chose not to whoop mine. I was not spanked as a child and I have respect for people as do my children I went on to college and even graduated with my Masters in Pscyhology by the age of 21. Whopping doesnt "ruin" a child I feel it just gives them permission in their own minds when they are old to hurt ppl they feel did things wrong with them. My Godchildren are spanked down to the 18 month old and it turns my stomach and I could never lay a hand on my own child while they were screaming OWE or MOMMY DONT THAT HURTS..

I am also aware that since I do not agree with spanking I will get thumbs down its kinda like when a breast feeding mom asks a question and you dont agree that breastfeeding is for everybody they to give you thumbs down its about opinions if you didnt want to hear mine dont ask the question. I wont let my children live in fear of me

And one more thing just what in the hell does an 18 month old, a 2 yr old or even a 3 or 4 yr old do that is SO BAD that requires you to spank them just what "kind of problems" can they have that make you want to lash out and hit the youngest and most innocent of our population? And YES I am a mother a mother of a daughter who will be 14 next week very well behaved and respectful, raised both my nephews now ages 15 and 17 and I have a 10 month old. I also raised part time my oldest godchild she to will be 14..NONE were whipped and all are very good children

Answer 8

I think it's because schools teach your children that if mom or dad spanks you then you can call the cops. Unfortunately they don't bother to tell the kids what will happen for their actions. They are taken away place in children centers, siblings are usually pulled apart and put in separate foster homes. My sister went through this because because my niece was mad at her and told her teacher that my sister hit her. It was a big surprise to my niece when CPS showed up and instead of taking her mom away they took her and her sister.

Answer 9

I'm not scared to spank my children and I dare any person to challenge me on it! If my kid is throwing a kicking screaming fit for a toy in Wal Mart and I have already said "no" I am not going to buy it just to shut him/her up. I'm going to continue to say no, give them a warning to stop the tantrum and then smack their butt if they don't and then we leave. I think parents are afraid of being embarrassed in situations like these and will do whatever is necessary to stop the tantrum and get the attention off of them. I'd rather see a child screaming bloody murder in the store, knowing that the parent is sticking to their guns instead of seeing a child being a spoiled brat, talking bad to their parents and getting whatever it is that they wanted.

It's sad to see so many parents be so weak in front of their kids and they don't realize that the kids KNOW it. The kids lose respect for them and that is why they treat them the way they do. There are no true and final consequences for their behavior. That parent says "no", the kid screams and hollers and hits and kicks and the parent gives in to avoid embarrassment or "scarring" the child. Give me a break.

Answer 10

Because society has come to this great conclusion that spanking demoralizes the child and they grow up insecure. It is exactly this lack of discipline that has crept into our schools , when kids mouth off to teachers or the foul language we hear out in public. The ACLU has made it where if you spank your kids ,the kids can call the police on you for child abuse for something we called attitude adjustment.

Answer 11

I "whoop" my kids when they need it, but probably not as often as they need it. And scared of them? Heck, no, my kids are scared of me, and that's they way I like it. It helps that I have a much older child that backs me up on everything I tell the younger ones I'll do if they don't stop, exaggeration or not (i.e. "I'm going to go pick me the biggest stick I can find and beat you with it right now if you don't stop pulling your sister's hair," then the eldest pipes up with, "Yeah, she did it to me one time. That's why my hair is so short in this picture.")