Is he being unfaithful?

Question

Help!!! My boyfriend of 11 months told me he had to "tell" me something.
(He was divorced 5 years ago and was cheated on, I was also married a couple of years ago and cheated on, so I'm hoping he's smart enough to not have done something behind my back...)
Anyway, he told me that on the Friday a girl who works across the street from him popped in to say hi after work, after seeing he was outside. She came on strong, leaving her phone number with him and said to call her. He said he was shocked, didn't know what to say and she left. He then goes on to say that he called her to arrange a meeting to have coffee and a chat, which he followed through with, supposedly telling her he wasn't interested. (He told me he would be somewhere else). Before this he had asked me if i had erased a phone number from his phone (hers i found out). I didn't touch his phone, but when i asked why he needed the number still, he said she had a blocked toilet and he was going to look at it What do you think?

Answer 1

Umm... sweetheart, that sounds shady as hell to me. Been there, done that. I'm begging you not to put yourself through that hell. I did this not to long ago, and I tried my damnest to see it through and to pretend like nothing was going on. Man did I make a big mistake.

See, even if he didn't cheat on you honey... He still lied like hell to you about where he was going to be. So, if later on he was planning on saying that he wasn't cheating, he did a pretty shitty job. When they lie to you about where they're gonna be, and then try to make like they're not cheating, it's hard to believe them. Why else would he lie?

Also, they have plumbers and plungers for blocked toilettes. She didn't need to call him, and he didn't need to go to her rescue. I'm not saying he is definitely doing it, but I'm telling you that he did a poor job of proving that he wasn't when he lied to you about where he was going to be and ended up somewhere with her.

I went through this not too long ago... The guy told me he was going to be at Starbuck's with some friends... and I later found out that his "guy friends" were actually a girl from work. I went through a living hell after that. Day and night I couldn't sleep or eat, I was sick all the time, crying... It really messed me up. I pity anybody who has to go through that... So please don't let yourself go through it. If you're having trust issues, end it now before it goes down hill.

Answer 2

ok. haven't you ever gave ur number to guy and thought that u two "could have something?" only to wait by the phone anxiously awaiting his call? but HE NEVER CALLS! bingo. your husband would have done the same thing....ESPECIALLY if he is not interested in her. A guy never calls a girl he isn't interested in, let alone go out with her/arrange a date with her! he actually took it a step farther, which should tell he is more than thinking of a casual conversation. and "going over her house to fix a broken toilet?" classic, but lame. i mean if he had nothing going on, you would know about every little detail of the rest of his married life. why? cause you are his best friend and confidant-the one he tells everything to. you would have no doubts. but the decision is up to you.

Answer 3

something is going on.. you should be highly upset at the fact that he went out and had coffee with her just to let her know he isn't "interested.." yeah right. telling someone that your not interested doesn't involve you meeting up with them. you tell them right at that moment before phone number comes into play. i think whats happening is that he's getting caught up in the fact that another woman is interested in him and he's curious to see where things will go with this woman. what he's feeding you is bullsh*t and you should see that clearly and not second guess things. i don't think he's had sex with her YET, they've probably got sexual because the woman seems to be very aggressive and bold. but, this is something you shouldn't tolerate or wonder about when the answers are right there in your face. he's disrespecting you by seeing this woman for whatever reason.

Answer 4

OK one thing if he goes to "chat and have coffee" then he is in to this girl i don't mean to Hurt yer feelings but he probably is cheating on you and he knows that this chick don't have a backed up toilet and if she doesn't than slap her and tell her to lay off yer man also ask yer bf if he has been to liing to and remember to see if he looks like he is bluffing and you should know especially after 11 months and that's what i think.

Answer 5

That actually sounds kind of fishy. I don't think a coffee meeting was necessary to tell her he wasn't interested. He should have just ignored her unless she kept bothering him, then he should've told her he was happily taken. (but not through a special meeting) Tell him it's kind of funny that he's all of sudden taking an interest w/ her. Maybe he's falling for her, but you never know til you ask. and if he lied about meeting her, that makes it really fishy. He's either cheating, thinking about cheating, or very inconsiderate of you and your feelings.

Answer 6

if he changes his habits and has vag answer for any kind of question.if he starts acting different without any real worring signs or reason for the change. men dont change for no real reason so wit watch and listen if he is cheating then he has already told you, it may just be without words ie the wat he kisses you or makes love to you after so long you just know someone annd how they touch yo keep that in mind and you will find your answer good or bad

Answer 7

I do not get why he is telling you all this detail unless he is covering tracks, or feels guilty for something. If he was shocked she was paying attention to him why was he making any move to see her? No sense. He is trying to blame her for the attention to him. It was not his fault - he is saying.

I think this is shaky. Run.

Answer 8

I say he's full of crap. Leave him, you deserve better