Hated Since Birth?

Question

OK, Not long ago I found out a secret my parents had been keeping from me since I was born. My mother suffers from chronic epilepsy and has done since a very young age, when my father met my mother, he didn't want children and when he found out that she was pregnant with me he was thinking of leaving her, but he loved her so much that he stayed with her and was there for her.

When I was born, something went wrong with my birth that caused my mum to have an epileptic fit, stopping her heart and effectively killing her, however they managed to restart her heart and save her life. When I was very young I remember my father seemed to hate me, never bonded with me, never seemed to be proud of me and when I used to play up beat me. I was very confused and very scared of him why he was like this to me.

Until I find out recently it was because I nearly killed my mother, I am finding coping knowing with this very hard and lately have been really distant to everyone. Please Help

Answer 1

Oh man this must be really terrible. I felt hated by my mother because she has bi-polar disorder, border-line personality disorder, depression, and M.S. She was also beaten up as a child so that caused her to hate children. I had no idea that she was sick until about a year ago. This explains why she treats me like crap. Do you know what I did? I limited contact with her. I can't talk to her so much anymore because of what I found out. It's terrible, but you are your own person and you can start a family and love your children very much. I hope I helped....because it's an awful thing to go through!

Answer 2

Will your dad find forgiveness in his heart towards you? What happened to your mom when you were born was not your fault. When I was born, my mom was in a car accident with my dad driving wrecklessly. I also nearly died, my heart stopped 6 times before the doctors revived me. My dad can't forgive himself to this day that I know of. He has a hard time coping with it.

I imagine it's hard for your dad to express how he truly feels about you. Maybe he needs counseling to get past some hard feelings about the night you were born. Are you closer to your mom or dad? Remember even if your dad so called hates you, Jesus loves you no matter what. Jesus can help your dad if he allows Him to. Try talking to a christian counselor and see what comes out of it. You may find some help to have you and your dad connect and have a good relationship like father and daughters should. Your dad should be thankful that you both lived through this ordeal.
I'm sure if you asked your dad deep down in his heart he loves you. Good luck. I'm sure things will get better!
If you ever need to talk my email address is [e-mail] .

Answer 3

That is such a sad story. I feel for you, man. Your dad really needs to get over that incident because she is alive and breathing to this day. How old are you?

If you're 18 (which I doubt) then you should move out immediately if your father is abusing you. Maybe call a hot line. I hope you get through and that asshole better calm his role.

Answer 4

You might just be thinking the worst, because you yourself think that your birth might have killed your mom...in other words, when we sometimes love someone so much, we can find many reasons for people acting kinda funny towards us, and blame ourselves, instead of putting the blame on the one who deserves it, your dad in this case...Who knows, maybe his 'hatred' was misplaced resentment,...and he just seemed this way, as you reflect back...maybe you are just being horribly hard on yourself right now, out of guilt that YOU might have caused your mom these problems...but please remember this,...you did not make the decision to get married, they did, you didn't make the decision to have a child, they did, and you DID NOT cause your mom to go into an epilectic fit,...she was under doctors care also, and was probably very aware of the concequences, of getting pregnant, and having a beloved child would involve...I think your dad, maybe almost losing your mom, may have just put all his attention to your mom, and maybe with all the stress he was under, seemed to be that way to you...Please, just pray for him, and forgive him,...it isn't worth it now, to let anyone make you feel guilty over something you are so innocent of...God is there for you, and so is Jesus, and They are there for you to love, and have faith in,...and honor your mom and dad, and forgive your dad, and continue to love them,..don't let this ruin your life,. especially because you did nothing wrong...God Bless, and when you ask the Lord for help dealing with this, you will feel better, believe me..

Answer 5

go 2 peekvid and watch the secret make ur life what u want it 2 b dont worry about anyoneelse my mother didnt want me but so what im ok

Answer 6

tell him how you feel it may or may not work but at least he knows how you feel.