Question for Atheist/Non-Believers in God/Higher Power?

Question

I have been wondering about what some of your experiences have been like living in a world where most people believe in God or a Higher Power. If you feel that I'm being nosey please accept my apology and skip this question. I would be interested in how you would handle situations such as a family prayer. I'm sure you have been in positions where people just assume you are a Christian and ask you to pray with them etc. Is there a certain shock that you expect when you tell them you don't believe in God. My sister is an agnostic and as far as the family goes she goes along with family prayers before meals, she shows respect to Mom & Dad. How do people react when you simply say: I don't believe there is a God or the bible. I know most Athesit are very nice people who wouldn't go out of their way to hurt someone or insult them. Is it more of a personal silence that is easier rather than dealing with the difficult explanation. Do you face anger with some?
Your experience..thanks

Answer 1

First of all I would like to thank you for this polite and well reasoned question. I have been discovering of late a disturbing degree of vitriol coming from both sides of the fence and it's nice to see someone engaging in friendly discourse.

I am a radical Atheist and indeed I have had many such experiences. It happens most often (and understandably so) when I attend Bible Study classes. I do this to learn more about the text that has influenced my society more than any other, but it is generally assumed that anyone who would attend such a thing is themselves a follower of it's teachings. Usually I simply do not comment on discussions where the assumption is made and when they pray I just fold my hands in my lap politely and keep my eyes open, neither participating in worship nor disrespecting the others. Surprisingly nobody generally notices. Sometimes they do however and I don't hesitate to explain that I am just an Atheist continuing my cultural education. Some are nice, the rest are usually at least quiet and I imagine wait until I leave to say "What the hell was that heathen doing here?" Or so is the vibe I sometimes get. The same goes for family prayer. For the most part though, it's usually enough that I'm a nice guy.

Answer 2

I face pressure to 'show respect' at many functions. I do not say the pledge of allegiance nor do I bow my head in prayer. I do, however, keep my mouth shut until asked specifically about my beliefs. It was very hard to be an atheist and attend a Christian school, many times the prayer leader would open the prayer with a command, 'Every head bowed, every eye closed..." I find that usually when asked about my beliefs as an atheist the questioner already knows them and wants to open up a dialog in an effort to sway me to their opinion. So, when my head was not bowed and my eyes open this would invite a 'conversion attempt'. The condescension during these attempts was thinly covered by a fake meekness that belied their true intent, conformity. I have indeed faced hostility, name calling 'devil boy etc..' my wife's family no longer speaks to her, and situations at work become tense. I do not advertise my opinions but when you live in the Bible Belt this hardly matters, they will advertise for you.

Answer 3

I have a few Christian friends and coworkers, but most of the people I know are agnostic, with a few hard-core atheists (like me). In the situations where someone starts to pray I either keep silent or back out of the room, if possible. It doesn't come up often in this part of the world. In northern New England, it's considered a bit unseemly and suspect to openly display your religion, and downright rude the proselytize. I have never had someone come right out and ask me about my beliefs since I moved up here; trust me when I say it's refreshing. Even when it comes up in the course of a conversation, no one seems overly concerned about my apostasy. People up here consider faith to be a private matter. It's a shame the rest of the world doesn't see fit to follow the example.

Answer 4

The most memorable event was having a pistol drawn and aimed (poorly) at my face and being asked, "Do you believe in God now?" I corrected the assailants aim (his aim was off, he would have caused me months of agony and reconstructive surgery -- I prefered death), then calmly commented, "I don't believe in any deity so weak as to be contained in a bit of copper and lead."

Family prayer stopped the first time I declined to attend Christmas Midnight service. Until then, I quietly stepped back and waited in quiet while the others prayed, after that, no prayer was offered at all. I would not object, but I think they got the clue that it was very excluding when they could silently offer their own personal prayers.

Answer 5

In my immediate family, we don't really talk about religion. But my grandparents are strongly greek orthodox christians. I don't mind doing prayers with them though before meals. Nobody has ever really acted surprised or shocked when I say I'm atheist, but I feel I face a lot of discrimination against atheists on this board.

Answer 6

I could tell my family and friends anything. I could tell 'em that I've decided to get surgery to make me look like Shaquille O'Neal and none of 'em would even blink. Family is family, is their creed. I'm theirs, they're mine and that's that.

So, being an atheist is no big deal when I'm at home.

It's when you hear things like, "Atheists should not be considered citizens or patriots," or "We need people of faith in high office" that you feel alone, and sometimes afraid -- because you know that a large majority agrees with these sentiments, or at least will not voice disagreement (which amounts to the same thing).

Answer 7

What country do you live in? I have very few christian friends. We don't pray as a family because we are all athiest with the exception of my mother.

In school during assembly they had prayer, but I did not bow my head.

Answer 8

My boss likes to bless the food before we eat lunch. It irritates me but he's basically a good guy so I let it go. I travel in a circle of friends (and relatives) where agnostic ideas are almost universal so i don't experience this much.

Answer 9

If the activity is passive, I usually just shut up and sit it out. If it requires active participation, I decline. Most people have no problem with this, and I do not maintain an association with those who do.

Answer 10

I come from a family that's divided. Atheists and Christians, so undoubtedly, it's much easier to me than for most other people.