help! i hate to be rude, but i really need to ask someone to help chip in for something. How do i come off without being like "you have to pay" even though they sort of do...
2007-03-19 12:32:20 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
If it's about paying their fair share there's nothing rude about it. However, if you at all gave the impression that it would be your treat or your expense, then you have to be up front about collecting money BEFORE any expenditures are made. You CANNOT ask someone to pay for something after the fact if you gave the impression you would pay for the whole thing. That's a little like you going out with a friend, you order the soup and she orders the surf n' turf and then she suggests you split the bill. Doesn't work that way.
Otherwise, just come out and say it - "This is going to cost $x dollars, which comes out to $y per person, is everyone ok with that?"...
2007-03-19 13:07:49 · answer #1 · answered by ZenPenguin 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If we both chip in it will only be $ ??.00 each.
Or upon sitting down in a restaurant ask for separate checks.
If you are a guy taking a girl out on a date, this better not be the first one or it may be the last.
Often the one who invites may be expected to pay. It is always better to let them know early on in the conversation so that they don't find themselves at a dinner that they cannot afford.
Perhaps, "We are all getting together and in celebration of so and so's birthday going to lunch. It is a nice (food type) place and he would much prefer for us to all go out and have a nice meal together with him than for individual gifts. It will be around $10.00 each and we'll chip in for his meal."
Gas, "I don't know how to say this", (pause) "I don't mind driving, but Gas is getting so expensive that I have to ask for everyone to chip in a few bucks."
Straight forward and matter of fact, without any tone of frustration on your part. Say it like they couldn't have known before and this is what you need to continue doing such and such.
If you dance around the situation, they might not know what you are wanting to tell them.
God Bless You, ;-)
2007-03-19 19:37:31 · answer #2 · answered by CHS 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's not rude if you let them know ahead of time that everyone will be responsible for their own expense. Don't spring it on them after the bill is received, however.
2007-03-19 19:40:05 · answer #3 · answered by David M 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
would you like to help with the tab?
or how would you like to split this? I personaly think the second one lets them know that they need to pay and doesnt give them an out
2007-03-19 19:39:22 · answer #4 · answered by KarmicFacilitator2000 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Figure everyone's share and just tell them an amount, don't "ask" .
2007-03-19 20:18:52 · answer #5 · answered by Raven 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋