stressful wedding?

Question

ok, im getting married in june, and getting all of my girls dresses together and mine. but one of my bm told my moh that she wasnt going to be able to get the dress, i have tryed to get a hold of her to talk about it but she wont reply back. and last night my mom asked me if we would want to get married in Florida. we are still thinking about it. and it would just my family there. i would like to have it here where i live, Arkansas, to have my friends and my fiance's family, but with my girls saying they can get the dress and then they cant they are just stressing me out soooo bad. and right now i dont know if i want to have the wedding on the beach or here where i grew up. what would you do? i am sooo stressed out. and with all of this the dress thing i still havent found a place to have a wedding. because i dont know if they can get there dresses. what should i do?

thanks to all answers.

oh and her dress is not that much. it is only $80 and i know that she can afford it because she has a job her fiance has a job that pays 900/2 weeks. and they are not planning there wedding yet. i know that she can spare 80. they dont have any bills they live with his parents.

Answer 1

Same thing happened to me. I picked out my bridesmaid dresses and called all of the girls and told them the prices and stuff and said that within the next month we would go order them. Well they all told me that they would pay for the dress and that money wasn't a problem. Ok so the Wednesday before the wekend when we were going to go order them I called this one girl and told her we were going get the dress on Saturday and she was like I don't have any money. And I was like ok. I mean what am I supposed to say to that. So she ended up getting her mom to pay for it. Ok so she is married with 2 kids and is expecting another one in September. So that is why I asked before I picked the dress if money would be an issue. So that Saturday she couldn't go get the dress. Well everyday for the next week she would call adn say that she was going to go and she never did. Well last month was Mardi Gras and she ran into another friend of mine that is going to be in the wedding and they talked about it and stuff like everything was normal. And she swore that she would go and get the dress that Saturday during Mardi Gras and she never did. It has been over a month since then and I haven't talked to her since. She never called me or anything. So I ordered the dresses and just forgot about it. I was her Maid of Honor in her wedding 2 years ago and I would never have done that to her. She was one of my best friends in high school. I mean my bridesmaid dresses are pretty expensive but that is why I made sure with everybody before I made a final decision and if she couldn't afford it she could've said something. And her son was supposed to be our ring bearer but whatever I am just going to send her an invitation and see if she shows up or even calls me back by June. But I hope that everything works out with you and your girls. Sometimes at the most inconvenient times you really find out who your real friends are. Good Luck! Oh yeah and about the wedding location umm maybe you should think about what would be easier to plan. Finding vendors and stuff can be tricky expecially with a lot of the fraud stuff going around it may be easier to plan where you live and where you spend most of your time.

Answer 2

WoW! That is stressfull when your planning a wedding and you don't even know where it is going to be at. Well, you should always handle where the wedding is going to be at above anything else. The dress situation should be second. Keep in mind that a lot of places take at least 2 months to get the dress than it takes like 4 -6 weeks to get it altared. I would just keep on trying to call her and offer to pay for it. I picked out dress for my bridesmaids that were low cost. In fact they are only $100 at Davids bridal and they all like the styles. As for were your wedding should be well you need to follow your heart. I myself have a destination wedding coming up in August. The wedding is not about everybody else. It's about the place that means the most to you and your fiance. What does your dream wedding look like in your mind. Where do you invision it? Your opinions go first and family last. Your family will always have opinions and you can't please everyone, you never will with any wedding. But, your family does love you and they will eventually accept whatever your decision. Good luck!

Answer 3

Try not to get too stressed about this. I'm sure whichever option you decide on you will have a lovely wedding.

The location might depend on whether you want to have a small, romantic, slightly exotic wedding on the beach with only your closest family and friends; or whether you'd rather get married in a place that has more meaning to you, where more of your extended family and friends could attend. If you always dreamed of getting married in a particular church in your hometown or something like that, you should get married near home; if you're more adventurous and want something different and unique, then the beach idea might not be a bad choice.

For me, I am asking my maids to contribute as much as they can towards the dresses. I am also purposely searching for bridesmaid dresses that are reasonably priced so they have a chance of affording them. For those who cannot pay the entire price or can't pay at all, I will purchase the dress for them as a gift for being in my wedding.

Good luck. Stay calm. Embrace the moment. And congratulations!!!

Answer 4

Oh bless you girl.I can relate.My wedding was suppose to be big a beautiful.I had so many worries but then I realized one thing.I have the person I love waiting to make me his wife forever.All I need is him and someone to marry us.I want the most important people there.Mothers ,Fathers brothers sisters and friends.If they come they come if they don't you won't miss them cause you are gonna be so occupied with your dress your hair nails and such time will just fly by so fast you won't know where it went.So do what you feel in your heart.And remember if you have a small wedding the first time.No big deal it just leaves you bigger and better thing when you want to renew your vows in 10 yrs or so.You can have the biggest wedding you could ever dreamed of.

I had a small one with family and a few friends.No brides maid or groomsmen.Just me and my man in front of the pastor.You just do whats in your heart and don't let everyone else pressure you into anything you might regret.As for the brides maids not getting their dresses.Don't worry about them cause actually you don't need them .You are only suppose to get your dress and the maid of honor dress.Just have your maid of honor and best man next you you 2.I hope I was of some help to you.

Good luck and best of wishes for you and that special man.

Answer 5

First of all breathe!
I totally feel you on the bridesmaids problems. I was having the same problems with one of mine. She didn't like that i was having matching dresses which is a normal wedding thing. So what i did was i sat her down and had a talk about if she really wanted to be my bridesmaid. What i would do if i was you is just have a conversation with her where you explain that you feel that she doesnt' really want to be in your wedding party. That you can never reach her and that you feel that she's ignoring you. Explain that planning a wedding is stressful enough without having to second guess if your "friend" is actually fully deticated to being in your wedding party. I did and now my bridesmaid understand where i'm coming from and has agreed to not be so fussy.

As for the destination wedding. The wedding is all about what you want. Do YOU want your wedding to be with just family? Or do you want your friends around? I'm sure your mother means well in trying to get you to have it near her family. My mother wanted me to get married where i grew up and where she still lives. But i didnt' want a wedding there and decided to go with where I live now. And she understood, as will your mom i'm sure.
Just remember, it's okay to do what YOU want on YOUR wedding day. Just because you don't want to listen to what everyone "expects" you to do doesn't make you a bridezilla. It just means that you want the wedding of your dreams, just like every other girl out there.

Answer 6

first off relax. just take a few deep breaths.

the one girl in your wedding who you can't get ahold of for the dress - call her up and leave a message saying that if you don't hear from her by a certain date that you can't have her in the wedding. email her too and relay all the information.

if she doesn't respond by the date then go and get the dresses. if she calls you later on all upset tell her sorry but i needed to know by that date.

next you need to make a decision on where to get married. personally i would have it where you live. you love this place then why not get married there. get the reception site squared away and then you will have set the place you will get married.

a wedding only needs a bride, a groom, a witness, and the person who will marry you.

again just relax and don't freak out too much. remember this is one special day, but then you have the rest of your life to make a wonderful marriage!

Answer 7

End the stress today. Make a list of the five most important things about your wedding. If your groom doesn't make the list.... call it off. Now breathe and laugh. Its all good stress.

Do you know how to make a choice tree? It goes like this---list all the things you love about getting married in Arkansas. Now list all the things you love about getting married in FLA. Now take one item from the list and compare it to every other item on the list. Ask yourself this question....if I could only have Item A or Item B which would I choose (make a check)....if I could only have item A or Item C, item A or Item D....item A or Item D....then go on to Item B.....compare it to every item on the list...when you are done you should have check marks that show you whats most important to you.....if its a tie.... let the groom be the tie breaker (or your mom...mom's are important and they have been through this before).

As for girls and dressses. Set a date. Say this Friday. Put a call out for them to put $$ down to the dress place. Let them send it directly to the dress place (most bridal shops have been through this before). Any one without the cash, has made it clear. Done. If you want to , you could ask another close friend to step in...but dont call her a second choice...tell her how crazy in love with Ralph you are and that you are not managing your own decisions very well and would she understand and just stand up with you? problem solved.

Personally, I would be happier with fewer bridesmaids...if you are having pre-wedding events it is much easier to get together with 3 or 4 couples to decorate, make favors, etc. than to organize 14-15 ppl its also much easier on the budget to feed them since most of the time when you get together it is customary for you to do so.....

If you dont like my dress ultimatum...I would say make one more phone call attempt on Tuesday. On Wednesday, you have to go back to my dress ultimatum....

Ask you mom...does she know these women (or their moms if they are young --under 25 yrs old?).....you might call family members to say you are concerned since you haven't heard and you might just get your answer...........

God Bless....
START HAVING FUN!!! THIS IS NOT THE BAD NEWS!!!
LOL

Answer 8

You don't say why they can't get the dresses so I can't help you on that one but its your wedding get married where you and your future husband want to, it is your wedding, get together with the girls and come to some agreements about the dresses and plan to have your wedding. stop stressing and get your girls helping you they were chosen to be bridesmaids, I think they would be willing to take some of the stress off of you Congrats I hope I helped!

Answer 9

in case you mean elope in Reno, sounds rather like escapism on your area. i think of you and fiance would desire to easily take a seat at the same time; and communicate issues over. on a similar time as your better half's father to be must be the impetus for you having this Reno thought, I heavily doubt that he may be in prefer of this eloping concern. Plus, what you have defined consequently some distance sounds many times annoying on account which you're hypersensitive approximately each little thing as on your mom's enter. My suggestion to you is advance up; and, to boot, to have greater of a feeling of what's frequently carried out, see the link under for wedding ceremony making plans training.

Answer 10

Are you getting to the Bridezilla stage? Think of all the undue financial burden you are putting on others for YOUR day (dresses, hotel in Fla, etc) make it easy on everyone and elope have a party in both cities.