Opinions on the relationship situation...????

Question

Readers Digest version...
I live with one of my friends but I stay at my boyfriends house most of the time 5 out of 7 nights... her boyfriend is soon going to be moving in which means I need to move out, I dont really know anyone else that i would be comfortable to live with and I can't afford to rent a place alone. I moved to this city for a job which is good and I enjoy so I have no friends but I have a great man and a decent job, but now i have no place to live and i have been with my boyfriend for 3 months and i dont know if it is too soon for me to move in, I wouldnt mind but i dont think he would be comfortable with it "just yet" but he knows i dont have anywhere else to live unless i go back to NC, but i dont want him to say yes if he isnt ready.

So do I move in with him because we do love each other and it has long term potential... or do I move back to NC where i know people and have friends and could find another job, but loose my boyfriend b/c his life is here

Answer 1

I once had to move in with my girlfriend for economic reasons, too. If you approach this situation as if you were going to be his roommate, instead of a live-in boyfriend, it will be a lot easier to accept and to manage.

You need to discuss this arrangement with your BF where you really would live like a roommate (such as each of you having separate bedrooms). Your relationship will either work or won't work, and if it is destined to end, then not moving in with him would only prolong the inevitable.

But, for this to work, you and he have to be clear on what your house rules will be, and how you will share expenses and chores, and so forth. It is not the most romantc thing to do, but it is very necessary to do.

I say, "Why not give it a shot?"