Is there anyone else feel shame from their past?

Question

Just wondering. I have a very normal life, I have a good job and a loving wife that I wouldn't trade for anything.

I feel like I am hiding things, I feel if people knew they wouldn't want to be around me...I didn't do it but I feel shame.

I grew up in a home filled with violence and an alcoholic father that was abusive beyond belief. We were poor, we moved all the time in rented apartments and homes...I feel shameful for this and I don't know why.

I had fear that I would pass this on to my children. That never happened. I loved them everyday of their lives, they all went to college and are great adults. I love them more than words could ever come close to express. My wife is wonderful, we have never had problems, we are both people of peace, love and comfort. My life is a far cry from what it once was.

anyone else???or just me

Answer 1

You shouldn't feel shame, in fact you should be proud! There are a lot of people that use that as an excuse for not succeeding or some that refuse to acknowledge that at all. But despite your upbringing you were able to raise a loving family and have a happy marriage. You have nothing to be ashamed of.

Answer 2

I'm sure you don't want advice form a teenager, but I was in a family much like you explained before I was placed in foster care. I'm now happily adopted with great parents. My life now is great and have more than I deserve and yet I still after four years of counseling feel embarresed about my young childhood. I'm am often feel shame about what happened and I never tell anyone about why exactly I was taken from my parents....... it's totally normal to keep secrets, hide things, and feel shame.......... good luck.

Answer 3

Don't be ashamed for your upbringing it's not your fault. Even you did do things wrong think of this:
God says, "For I will be merciful to their iniquities, and I will remember their sins no more," (Heb. 8:12). If God chooses not to remember your sins anymore, why should you? Why should you harbor the guilt of a sin that has been forgiven and washed away by the blood of Christ? That is what He means when He says He will not remember it anymore. He simply will not bring it up again once it is confessed and forgiven. Stop punishing yourself.

Let it go.

Answer 4

I do not think that you should be ashamed of your past. I believe that the past is to be put behind you. I think you chould reflect on your past as a learning experience. I mean you have not abused your children or your wife, you provided them stability, and you never drank beyond your means. I believe that your past molded you into the man that you are today, you took the negatives you had from your childhood and turned them into something postitive. I think that you made it this way. Reflect on it, do not be ashamed of it.

Answer 5

I know what you mean... You must lay the sins of the past and of others at the saviors feet. His burden is light and has suffered for yours and everyone elses sins.

My problem was that I needed to forgive the person who wronged me--it may be you need to do the same. Being unforgiving can be the greater sin. It wasn't your fault, and you've done a great job giving your family a better life, but you need to let go and forgive your father and everyone for that matter.

Answer 6

You are not alone. These are things that aren't so out in the open and talked about, which is maybe why you feel shame. You shouldn't feel shame though because it's not your fault. You've done a wonderful job with your own family and should be proud of what you've accomplished.

Just know that you're not alone though.

Answer 7

I feel that way too. i am 12 years old and my dad sexually harassed me so I told the cops but since I cant see him anymore I feel like its my fault. My friends and family say they miss the old me but I just don't care about many things now. Except my dad.

Answer 8

We all have that "junk" that we wish we didn't do, weren't apart of, never saw and so forth. That is why it is great knowing that no matter the past you can change your future! Christ was sent to make all of the old regrets just that. Just regrets and bad memories on our road to salvation.

Answer 9

Yes ifeel ashame for some things idid well everybody has a lil problem and bipolerness and a whole bunch of things

Answer 10

I think all people are ashamed of something from there past but I think that you are an awesome man for all you have accomplished despite what you grew up with we all should be so lucky