I want out,my life sucks!!?

Question

my husband beets on me all the time,calls me names and the police here say if they come back they will take us both to jail,he hit me hard this morning and i packed my car and i want to leave but he took my keys and wont let me have them,i have no family im all alone in this worldi cant work i have dissability problems and been denied disability.i just dont know what to do,i cry all the time ,i dont sleep much and im always afraid im going to say something wrong and i usually always do,i just want out,he wont even let me have a phone cause he is afraid ill get help and leave,so what else is there for me but OUT of it all

Answer 1

There are still several options available for you...you are not stuck!
First of all...why would the police put you BOTH in jail if he is the one dishing out all the abuse?
The best thing to do is to have your husband put away and get yourself into a some kind of a support group where you can be around other people like yourself. Taking yourself 'OUT' of it all is the worst idea.
Im telling you this because my mother went through something VERY similar and she had made several attempts to end it all. Thankfully she was strong and finally took a real stand. Sometimes you have to put it all on the line and just suck it up. If you go to the police and they arrest you both, then perhaps its better for both of you. At least you will be somewhere that your husband wont be able to bother you and you can spend some time figuring out how you can begin improving your life.

Answer 2

Find a phone- ask a neighbor, go to a payphone. Dial 211. It is First Call for Help. It is run by United Way. They can point you in the right direction. Or go to the nearest hospital, tell them you are a danger to yourself. They can put you in the psych unit and there you may get the help that you need. You can leave. You can walk. If disability turned you down, try again, if that doesn't work, then I am sure that there is SOME job out there that you can do. A people greeter at walmart just stands there and gets carts and says hello. Anything will do to get you back on your feet. Everyone's life sucks at some point. You can make it out. You are probably suffering from depression because of the situation you are in. It isn't hopeless and you aren't alone. That is why they have these things in place to help people. GO- do what you have to do. Good Luck!

Answer 3

You are in a very bad situation right now. Do you have any friends that will help you? There are MANY places, like womans homes, that will take you in. If you husband hits you even once, NO MATTER WHAT YOU'VE SAID OR DONE, you need to get out and get help. I suggest leaving some of your stuff behind, don't even worry about packing, and go to the police. Tell them your husband is beating you. They will help you from there.

Remember that you were created for a reason. You are a very special person, even with your disabilities. God loves you very much and He wants the very best for you. Ask Him what you should do, He will tell you. He does not want you in an abusive relationship, and He definitely doesn't want you depressed. Here is a website that you can check into, this woman was also abused, sexually molested, very depressed, anything you could think of. But she turned away from that lifestyle and God has blessed her so much. Check it out!!! www.joycemeyer.com

Answer 4

Get help, use the programs out there to assist. You can leave w/out a car, can't you? If the pain is so bad that you can not, then wait until you can drive the car and make copies of the keys (not sure if that's a good idea though) to be able to use when you're ready and prepared. Get a restraining order, etc., but the programs that you can contact can help you with these things.
Below is a link of some checklists to prepare you to leave and things you need to bring with you when you leave
http://www.scvan.org/domestic_violence_qa.html#d

Call The National Domestic Violence Hotline:
1-800-799-SAFE (7233)
http://www.ncadv.org/protectyourself/GettingHelp_128.html
(memorize this number so he doesn't find it)

Link to domestic violence agencies
http://www.silcom.com/~paladin/madv/dvagencies.html

Find an organization in your county to help.
MOST IMPORTANT: BEWARE, HE CAN TRACK YOUR COMPUTER USAGE and know where you've been on your computer, and find out that you've asked this question.

Also about disability: State Disability is for one year only, then it goes to Federal Disability. It's basically Social Security's policy to deny, so it's something you've got to fight for (as if you don't need another battle, right?). Even people with terminally ill cancer have been denied. Fight for it, get a lawyer. If you win your case, SS has to pay for your attorneys costs.

Answer 5

Its hard to think constructively or logically when you are in such emotional turmoil. There has got to be at least ONE option available for you. Removing yourself and any children from this abusive situation is paramount. What ABOUT a woman's shelter? if not in your specific town, then at least in your county? If you don't call them, you won't know just how much they can or can't help you. There are crisis hot lines, they will do all they can to direct you to the right sources for help. You said you would have left if you could, but he took the keys? If you truly would have left, would you have stayed away for sure or do you waver in your decision to actually get away from this man/situation? Did you have a place to go? If you are very serious about leaving, by God, I'd find out how to hot wire your car! Please, for your own sake, get yourself calm enough so you can make some well thought out and life changing decisions. You are not alone. As I write this, there are other women who are in the same situation. Start praying and then planning. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Answer 6

A friend once told me ... " If you find you've dug yourself into a hole to deep......STOP DIGGING! "

You've packed your stuff, now... put one foot in front of the other, don't look back, make your way to a shelter, a friend, a police dept, DHS, anywhere you can avoid harm or contact of any kind with the person causing you this pain. Fold this hand and keep the next cards close to your chest, and learn what to keep and what to throw away! I've heard " I love him ", " I'm all alone ", " He'll change ", even " It's my fault" ...that's all crap!!.... move on and get a New Life, you wasted the last one on him! Life got ya down??? Thank him.

Answer 7

Well I would say while he is out.Just leave.There are shelters that will help you.Even if you have to leave behind things you dont want to.Just leave.
In the morning when he gets ready for work.Right after he leaves.Take a few of the things that mean something to you and go.
If you go to a shelter they should be able to help you find a place thats for battered women.You dont have to live like that.Scrounge together enough change to take a bus and you are good to go.
For your sake just leave

Answer 8

My dear Friend - you don't want out. You want IN. You need some help and there is help available. I don't know what town you live in, but you must know that there are agencies available that can help you - protect you. You don't say that you have any children - if you don't that is good. It sounds as if you and your husband together, have been hurting each other. You need to know first that God has not given you a spirit of fear, but of love, peace and a sound mind. A sound mind means that you can make some wise choices in your situation. Get a grip! You need to get in touch with a state agency who helps women and demand help and protection. If you have ANY friends, you need to run - to them. Contact your local police immediately - the division of domestic violence! You need to tell them that you fear for your life - THEY MUST PROVIDE ASSISTANCE TO YOU. They have a list of all the agencies available. Your situation sounds serious and if you want to get out of that and INTO a life of peace, prosperity and love - you will need to pull yourself up by the bootstraps and realize that this is NOT what God intended for your. You will have to find some strength and some faith from deep within you and move on it. Unless you want to die. This man will kill you if you keep living in this. I know it may seem hard -but you HAVE to do something for YOU. You can get a key made for your car - his taking your key does not render you helpless...Stop being the victim and be the winner in this. Since you obviously have access to the computer and INTERNET - get on line girl and look up some help and resources. You can get out if you will apply the same principal you used to write YAHOO to changing your world.

Answer 9

So you both go to jail. There are plenty of real life people that you can talk to in jail. once out, you can get away. Go to a womens shelter. You must get a lawyer for your disability. Most wont get paid unless you do). i waited over two years to get disability. Till then , go visit you local Human services office and apply for food stamps and (state disability) better known as AD&D. Also divorce court can be a big help. But first.... get away. even if you must be alone.

Answer 10

Do you have a local shelter for battered women? If so go right now. If not go to your local police station and tell them what you've told us and that you need some kind of help. You have to leave cause he could hurt you bad someday. Social Services should help also. Go to a neighbor if you have to, I think most would help in most cases even if just to use their phone. I care, and I'll be thinking about you.