So my boyfriend and I took a vacation to visit an old friend of his. When we got there his friend barely talked to me at all, and when he did it was more like he was questioning me about my relationship with flat out disapproval. His views were incrediably sexist (he had a recent messy break up) and he would always say "no offence" and then say something increadiably offencive. "No offence, but a woman's place is in the kitchen" "No offence but all women are after is a guy's money" It totally ruined my vacation. I am not a clingy girl but we have a very close relationship. When my bf and his friend had a chance to talk when I wasn't there, the guy basically told him that he should dump me, and that our relationship is only going to hurt him. Of course my bf told me what he said right away, but he's too much of a nice guy to just give up on a friend like that. The guy still calls all the time. We have plans of getting married in the future, what if we have to invite him?
2007-03-19 07:25:34 · 7 answers · asked by Shawnee 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
MY HUSBAND HAD FRIENDS LIKE THAT. I TOLD HIM I DID NOT LIKE THEM AND WHY. THAT WAS IT. EVENTUALLY HE SAW THAT HE DID NOT LIKE THE WAY I WAS TREATED AND THE RELATIONSHIP WAS DISRESPECTED AND DUMPED THE FRIEND. THE BEST THING YOU CAN DO IS NOT MAKE HIM CHOOSE. HE WILL SEE. BUT STAND YOUR GROUND. DON'T LET HIM TALK TO YOU ANY KIND OF WAY. THAT'S WHY HE DON'T HAVE A GIRL NOW. BECAUSE HE DON'T KNOW HOW TO TREAT THEM. GOOD LUCK.
2007-03-19 07:32:04 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've been in a similar situation...if he's your guys close friend you cant really avoid inviting him. Hopefully he's just bitter because of his recent break up and maybe will calm down in the future.
I wouldnt break up with your boyfriend over this or anything, ,but you should tell him that it bothers you and that your afraid he might start really listening to his friend and leave you.
The fact that your bf told you right away does show that he trusts you though...so talking to him should not be too hard..
2007-03-19 14:30:36 · answer #2 · answered by blackned_wings 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look if your boyfriend is really interested in you he needs to man up to his friend,it's really not your place to say anything unless,your bf doesn't have the guts to say something.his friend is disrespecting you on the low.You shouldn't even have to tell your bf how it made you feel he should have stepped in,in the first place.i understand he is a friend but as a friend your bf needs to put his friend in place.Question does this friend have a gf because sometimes they wait their friend to be as lonely as them,or they wait you for themselves,or the just don't want to see their friends happy unless they are!Watch your back!And tell your b/f to man up.alot of these comments say that you should be a good girlfriend and not say something they need to go somewhere and sit down!A man Will do as much as you allow him to say or do and that goes for woman too!It doesn't make you any less of a woman to stand your ground if so it makes you more of a woman.And if your bf gets upset tell him you had to do it because he didn't want to put his friendship on the rocks,but he put his relationship with you on the rocks.Yeah men and woman come and go but a good one is hard to come bye and hard to let go.
2007-03-19 14:35:06 · answer #3 · answered by TRUTH 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hate to say it, but you need to ignore it. A guy's friends are only as important as he lets them be. If he cares about you so much that he lets you in on what his buddy is saying and tells you not to worry about it, then you know you're important enough to him that what his buddy says is not. It sounds like the guy basically has a chip on his shoulder and there really isn't anything you can do about that except be what you are right now: a good girlfriend.
Just my opinion. Good luck. 8)
2007-03-19 14:32:00 · answer #4 · answered by versweet 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It seems to me that this friend is jealous of you in a very Saving Silverman kind of way. He's worried that, when you marry your boyfriend, you'll be taking him away. He chose to take out his insecurities on women. Explain your anxiety to your boyfriend. See if you can get him to work on his friend a little. And if he does come to the wedding, try to avoid him.
Of course, if I heard him say that a woman's place is in the kitchen, I would have thrown him into a large piece of factory equipment. But that's another answer.
2007-03-19 14:31:24 · answer #5 · answered by Rio Madeira 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Don't stress over this guy, sounds like the two of you are happy so why worry. Just make sure your man knows he is full of it. I don't think you have anything to worry over, and sure you will have to invite him to the wedding, but be nice and know that you have your man! Good Luck
2007-03-19 14:31:06 · answer #6 · answered by Melanie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he should dump you
2007-03-19 14:28:53 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋