She lets the kid stay up till 11:00 on school nights,and till whenever on the weekends. I have to be up at 5:30 for work so I like to be in bed by 10:30 at the latest.How do I tell her to put the child to bed at a decent time and not make her mad?
2007-03-19 06:35:20 · 12 answers · asked by Chris F. 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
just flat out tell her, maybe u should think before u let them move in
2007-03-19 06:40:42 · answer #1 · answered by ? 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
BEFORE your girlfriend moves in this is an issue that you need to discuss in detail. You should sit down at the kitchen table, with no interruptions (TV, kid, phone, NOTHING). Explain to your girlfriend that you remember when you were her daughters age and you had a bed time of 8:30 pm or 9:00 pm. on school nights and 10:00 pm Fri and Sat. You could also explain that you feel that the rest is good for her daughter. And lastly you can explain that you are concerned about how this will affect you when you have to get up at such an early hour and depending on how large your house/apartment is, this may affect her daughter also. Good luck to you and God Bless.
2007-03-19 07:13:14 · answer #2 · answered by tersey562 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well these things should have been discussed before they moved in. If you are serious about this women you need to be a man and set some rules. If you are going to be a dad to her child you need to act like it but it must be reinforced through mom as well. Ask you girlfriend if she want you to be like a dad to her little girl and if she says yes then start with what you feel would be beneficial to the whole family as far a a schedule for bed time and stick to it. If she says no then I would re-evaluate the living arrangement as you are only asking for trouble either it will come between you and her or her and her daughter she should never be put in a situation where she has to choose either you or her child. It should always be her child hands down. To avoid friction later sort this out as soon as possible don't be scared best to know before to much time and effort is committed to making the relationship work. If child is head strong now and mom lets her get away with it you can bet there will be bigger and badder problems for you when she gets older(teens).
2007-03-19 07:29:55 · answer #3 · answered by squekie0874 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to her before they move in or you'll not be getting any sleep. Since they're moving into your place it's only fair that you get to set some of the rules and one about quiet time starting between 10 and 10:30 and lights out at 10:30 seems fair.
If they don't want to go for ask how they'd like to be woken up at 5:30 every morning. I'd say turn around is fair play.
2007-03-19 06:40:52 · answer #4 · answered by Critter 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, to begin with, don't be blunt about it, no matter how honest you want to be with her about things. Some women would take it to be a direct poke at their parenting skills and will not take it lying down, nor will they forget such slights. You could always,however mention how nice it would be if she could be put to bed earlier so that you two could spend some "personal" time together.
This could work because judging by the fact that you have to get ready for work at 5:30 in the morning, I would think you were working pretty long hours. So she should be able to understand, and you' could also score brownie points by your willingness to set aside some personal time with her.
2007-03-19 06:59:38 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
A 7 year old should be getting 10 hours of sleep a night. When my daughter was 7 she had to be in bed by 8PM to get up at 6AM to get ready for school.
Same schedule should be used on weekends with the same bedtime.
2007-03-19 06:43:24 · answer #6 · answered by Carp 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Before she moves in, you and your girlfriend need to sit down and discuss the roles and responsibilites of everyone in the house. Since you have to work early, I would suggest a 9pm bed time for the daughter.
I STRONGLY URGE you to talk about all matters that bother you NOW before the girlfriend moves in. If you don't it'll bite ya in the butt later.
2007-03-19 06:42:16 · answer #7 · answered by MJ 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Make this clear before she moves in. If she gets mad then expect her to put the child first all the time. What your asking is not unreasonable.
2007-03-19 07:29:30 · answer #8 · answered by Dovahkiin 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Try to make it clear to her that you aren't trying to judge her or be the "boss". If your going to be living together, you need to be able to talk about these things and come to a compromise of some sort. I highly recommend "love and logic" parenting, if you can find someplace around you that teaches it. If you can go to the classes together, then it will feel like your a team, instead of being on "sides".
2007-03-19 07:05:07 · answer #9 · answered by Lady M 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should set some ground rules from early. She has to understand that she will be inconveniencing you and you need to be in bed by a certain hour. Just be bold about, but not rude and uncaring.
2007-03-19 06:41:20 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well you can find an article on sleep deprivation and show it to her and ask if she thinks perhaps her daughter could have a need for more sleep. That could work.
2007-03-19 06:42:13 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋