After all, we've only been dating about 2 1/2 months. It's just so intense it feels longer. He has indicated to me a serious fear of marriage. He's twice divorced with 3 kids. When I found out yesterday that he had been engaged to his last gf (whom he swears doesn't hold a candle to me), I became irrational. I had thought he wasn't the marrying type anymore, but learning that made me just feel it was ME. I said I would never be good enough for him to marry. He felt guilty, and I think I may have seriously ruined the innocence and love we had.
I know I'm incredibly lucky just to be with such a remarkable man, but I can't help but feel his love for me falls short if he isn't thinking of eventually marrying me. I know his itinerant lifestyle (he's a pilot) makes marriage logistics nearly impossible, but if he thought of doing it for HER...
2007-03-19 04:42:59 · 9 answers · asked by nondescript 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
you've only been dating for 2 1/2 months. This guy is coming off of two divorces and a cancelled engagement. Don't you think he's naturally going to be a little gun shy about committing to a marriage proposal?
You shouldn't compare yourself to the previous girlfriend. That relationship was completely different from yours. It's not a question of "what does she have that I don't have", the question is about him and what he's looking for.
take it easy and don't put all this pressure on him so early into the relationship. If he wants to marry you he will let you know. Just give him a fair amount of time to really get to know you really well and get comfortable with the idea of marriage.
2007-03-19 04:56:48 · answer #1 · answered by Thrill K 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well 2 1/2 months is no time to be considering marriage. And you should not be comparing yourself to his past relationships, and he should not be bringing the past in the two you's relationship if he wants a future with you.
If he says he's not the marrying kind so early on I say he's probably a waste of time. You want to be married someday, that's what "you" want to do and that's ok. But a guy who says he's afraid and so forth just isn't going to commit and is getting the "intimacy for free" sorta speak.
2007-03-19 04:51:28 · answer #2 · answered by beanie_babymama 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Love
2016-03-29 06:13:12 · answer #3 · answered by Patricia 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Chances are that after two marriages with three kids, he isn't interested in making the same mistake again. Also, if he is the custodial single parent, his priorities ought to be with his kids. You cannot expect to, nor should you aspire to, become more important to him than his kids.
You should realize that it isn't you he is afraid of; it is the inherently flawed 'institution' of marriage that is the cause of so many problems.
Humans deserve better ways of formalizing their most cherished relationships other than 'marriage'.
2007-03-19 04:50:47 · answer #4 · answered by kurtrisser 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Excellent, keep up the good work!
With a bit of luck, and in maybe four years and three relationships on, you may understand that you can't live your life by what 'she' (his EX girlfriend) had or did, or that you can't beat a man into marriage.
Go on, you're on the right track!
2007-03-19 04:57:57 · answer #5 · answered by mgerben 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your relationship is still young so you can still find someone who is more that willing to stay with you the rest of his life thru the sanctity of marriage.
2007-03-19 04:49:47 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
JEALOUS!!!! never good, get over it, maybe he'll surprise you
2007-03-19 04:49:47 · answer #7 · answered by sweethyedreamer213 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I really dont know
2007-03-19 04:45:28 · answer #8 · answered by Sexy Z 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
just do it
2007-03-19 04:46:46 · answer #9 · answered by troble # one? 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋