Answer me i need help!!!!?

Question

is it bad to SPANK your kids and what is a good age to start??

Answer 1

The fact that you're asking this is a good sign.
Spanking your children will stop the bad behavior in the short term, but it doesn't teach your child anything about why they shouldn't do it or theiir own willingness in the future not to do it. You want to raise a thinking child, one who won't do the wrong thing even without a threat of pain. Sapnking is absolutely no more effective than a time out. A time out is surprisingly efficient and it teaches the child without creating hate and rebellion in the later years. Time outs are less satisfying for the parent who wants to get out their frustrations on someone who can't fight back, but it's wrong. And in the long term it will cost you when it really matters that your child be able to think for him/herself when there are no authority figures around.
Some people confuse discipline with spanking. You can properly discipline your kids without ever hitting them. Time outs should be one minute for every year of age and it should always be followed with an eye to eye (yet gentle) explanation of what the child DID and what the child SHOULD have done. That seems simple, but it's very effective and most importantly it's lasting. Children who respect and love their parents are much more likely to be obedient than kids who are waiting to do something behind their parents back. Trust me, you don't want to raise the second kind. You will pay later when you spank.

Answer 2

I personally am against spanking. I was raised by parents who spanked me. I think it is very wrong. Why should a parent have to use physical force to get respect or get their kids to listen? If you plan on spanking wait until the child is about 3 or 4. At that age they can take responsibility for what they do. You should not spank a child younger than that. ( although I know a few parents who do) Good luck

Answer 3

No it is not. It is a method of disciplinary action and to me the most effective as children learn from a very young age not to do certain things if they don't want to be spanked. To those persons who think it is abuse, I beg to differ. it all depends on the level of action which you take, I am not saying to hurt the child but get your message across,"this is wrong...........this is right.!" Believe me children are smart and if they want to do something that is not right and there are absolutely no consequences to face for their actions they will do it now and they will do it later, you are the one to decide when you will take corrective action. Have you ever been to a grocery or some public place and witnessed a 3 or 4 year old behaving REALLY badly and the parent is so embarrassed and does not know what to do? I laugh in these situations because they (the parents) are reaping what they sow. If there is some other way of getting the message across without spanking a child, by all means employ it. Once your child can understand right from wrong but does not do the right things it is a good time to start disciplining them before it gets way out of hand.

Answer 4

I was spanked when I was a kid and I turned out great! I don't believe in spanking a baby! Maybe when they are about two or older, depending on the child. It should only be used if nothing else works and only on the bottom or thigh and not so hard that it bruises them. (Actually a lot of kids will react to a light 'pat' and cry, not because it hurts, but it hurts their feelings) Try time outs, sending child to room, grounding from doing stuff he likes, ect...before spanking. Sometimes that's the only way to make my oldest behave. It doesn't make them learn to hit back like a lot of people like to say. Mine doesn't. She knows better! And NO I don't abuse her. I love her and know what's best for her. She knows this, too.

Answer 5

Spare the rod and spoil the child! I am a believer in spanking. Not beating. A smack on the behind or on the hand is needed sometimes but only is the child has done something that has put themselves or someone else in danger. I dont think spanking should be brought into the picture until the child is old enough to know right from wrong. Usually around 3 or so. I was spanked as a child and it made me think twice about doing certain things. Int his world today everything has to be pc and people love sticking their nose where it doesnt belong. Have you seen the kids today? They are disrespectful and out of control. I think its because they dont get their butt smacked when they act up. Parents nowadays are too soft. Your not gonna scar your child or make them hate you because you spanked them.Good luck in your decision

Answer 6

I don't think Spanking is a good first resort, typically age 2-3 is when you would probably start, but I'd use time outs first. And never spank to correct hitting, hitting a child for hitting doesn't make sense.
Again though it should be a last resort.

Answer 7

Most everyone is going to say mean things for that question. I would try alternatives to spanking. Spanking teaches kids that physical violence is okay and they see enough of that everyday. The only time I would consider it is if there touching the stove or running into the street and you have told them repeatedly not too. I rather give a swift smack to the bottom and them know I'm serious then have them burned or dead.

Answer 8

Why does spanking HAVE to equal beating? Most parents who spank also discuss the issue with their children and EXPLAIN what they did to get in trouble in the first place and how to not have it happen again. It is a tool. There is nothing wrong with spanking a child! All 3 of my kids have been spanked and NONE of them fear me, they fear the punishment instead. If you use it correctly and sparingly it is a useful tool in teaching your children immediate consequences for their behaviors. I started with my son when he was 18 months old but he was also very advanced for his age and speaking complete sentences. He got told what was wrong, why it was wrong and what he should have done instead and then a swat on the behind. I'm so tired of everyone slamming parents who spank and labeling it child abuse! It is NOT abuse when it is used correctly. Abuse is using physical punishment out of anger and it leading to excessive force on a child. Abuse is neglecting your childs emotional and mental well being and even physical when you allow them to sit in front of a TV all day long, playing video games, talking on the phone, eating junk food and running amock just because you don't want to "scar" them or discpline them properly!

Answer 9

There are better methods to use instead of spanking. Do time outs, put them in a spot where they can't see the TV and there are no toys around. IF they try and get up or anything put them back with no response. For the length of time use their age and add a minuet, that is how long they should be there. When the time out is over go over wit them again as to why they were put there and reassure them that you love them.

Answer 10

I do belive in spanking depending on what happened and if nothing else is working my little girl is 4 and very very headstrong timeouts do not seem to work with her. I started spanking her at about 19 months well i say spanking it is more like patting and never on bare skin but enough to let her know that I am not playing. It is your own discretion use your best judgement.