I've been with my bf for 2 months(im 20,hes24)I am his first gf in 2 yrs(his ex cheated on him & was badly hurt this)At first he was always wanting me to come out to where he lives,we live 30 min away and only i have a car.In the first couple weeks he took me to meet his parents and his friends and i was very happy with this new relationship.Lately hes been acting distant.Now we barely see each other and when we do,we are either at his parents house or out with his friends.I feel neglected & like he doesnt care about me i've brought his up with him b4 and he just tells me i shouldnt feel like that and to just "chill" and that hes not going anywhere.When we are together he is very attentive and tells me how much he enjoys hanging out with me,but then I dont see him for 4 or 5 days.i've also noticed he drinks alot.I want to bring this up again b/c it's REALLY bothering me.I dont want to break up and I dont want to play games..Why do u think hes acting like this?how should i handle this?
2007-03-19 03:35:25 · 18 answers · asked by kimmy_717 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I think that it is in your best interest to rather leave the relationship. Its only been 2 months and already he is showing his true colors. If this behavior made the other girl cheat then I dont blame her. He is pushing you away and I dont think that you deserve this kind of confusion anyway.
2007-03-19 03:42:21 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi Kim,
Read your problem with deep concern and I can only share few things pal just to keep you aware of certain things on life.From what you have written it looks like your bf is a confused person and he is searching and prioritising in life and sadly you may or may not be one of the top priorities.But that does not deter you fromleading your life happily.As he says rightly CHILL- YEP JUST CHILL.This is the age when you should focus on your passion in life and how your passion in life can make your future secure financially, emotionally, physically and socially.Remember real happiness in life should never be external but should be internal and you should have insight and understand the magnanimity of life beyond an individual.Do not feel insecure about any indivdual ,if that's so ask your self honestly "IS IT WORTH IT?",Watch some good comedy movies, catch up with your family and old friends and if you have grandparents , meet them and spend a day with them and see the difference for your self. good luck and smile kim- LIFE IS BIG , SO IS KIM AND YOUR SMILE TOO
au revoir
2007-03-19 10:55:35 · answer #2 · answered by ashwin kumar k 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think at the beginning his intentions were probably good. But I would bet that he has a drinking problem and his alcohol comes first. He might tend to go on drinking binges- and he may be a person who is quite lazy when it comes to relationships. If after 2 months with this guy it has dwindled down to this, I don't see where he has anything much to offer you in terms of a relationship.
2007-03-19 10:57:26 · answer #3 · answered by Annie 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi;
After re-reading your question, I truly feel that this young man needs to grow up. It appears to me that his only interest is the fact you have a car and very willing to hang with just his friends. When a man tells a woman to "chill" that is just what you should do. Chill this relationship real fast. I don't trust anyone person who drinks a lot and then can turn and be attentive. I feel he is just using you. You sound like a very smart young lady don't waste your heart on this guy.
LittleGree
2007-03-19 11:03:48 · answer #4 · answered by LittleGree 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are both young, and dating for a couple of months. It is too soon for you to worry, but it will be too late if you let time go by what is upsetting you in your relationship. You'd better be honest with him and yourself. I'm sure he'd like you to do so, if he really cares for you. Maybe he hasn't realized yet that you feel upset, but when he does, and if you don't say a word, he'll misunderstand the truly reasons.
He has been hurt before and he's probably just being careful, in order to put is feelings in order. Beware, do not depend on him too much, because maybe he is not ready yet for a relation, and then you mustn't get hurt.
2007-03-19 10:58:12 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow girl! You have your hands full with this guy. First of all, let me tell you...that when a man drinks alot...he has alot on his mind. I'm like that! Second, it sounds like he's just using you. How come he doesn't compliment you in front of his folks or friends? I would! If 2 people really like each other, there should be no holding back if something is wrong in a relationship. I had so many bad relationships. One of them was because of my drinking...but there can be more other issues involved too!
2007-03-19 11:17:21 · answer #6 · answered by southpark392006 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you are not very happy in this relationship. Maybe you should break it off before you waste any more time on this one. He lives with his parents, dosen't even have a car and he is 24 years old. He sounds like a imature looser. Does he drink beer and plays video games all night with his friends?lol Find you an older more mature bf. Good Luck!
2007-03-19 10:42:27 · answer #7 · answered by angie a 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wheres his car? If you have to be the only one going to see him ALL the time , that would get old fast. Isn't he the man or are you? he should be coming to see you every now and then because your worth it girl ! If he talks about drinking alot then he has a problem. Better start backing off before you get really hurt. I agree that maybe the reason his other girlfriend dumped him was because of his im-mature ways.
2007-03-19 10:57:01 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well he might be going through a depression... but the way he's acting is strange even for that. Next time you talk to him ask him to go out for dinner just the two of you and have a talk. Tell him you won't except it and if things don't change you want to split. I wouldn't be in a relationship your not happy in -- even if when your with him your happy -- thats not satisfying. It may hurt him but maybe this is the reason him and his last girlfriend had problems.
2007-03-19 10:44:03 · answer #9 · answered by Okaydokay21 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he is going on drinking binges. Probably a good idea to bring the drinking up to him again. Do you guys talk on the phone in between dates? Is he still open with you? There are a lot of other things to factor in. Is he not spending time with you because he is working? Sounds like something is going on. Get to the bottom of it soon, or it will drive you crazy.
2007-03-19 10:43:16 · answer #10 · answered by love me despite it all 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋