A 2 year old that says NO all the time!!! How do I make her stop??

Question

My little girl has discovered the word NO and knows its meaning. How do I get her to stop??

Answer 1

A 2 yr. old child is learning how to control their body and has gained new independence. This is a developmental stage that young toddlers need to go through in order to gain more skills. There is no reason to force the issue and try to make her stop. This will only promote a power struggle and quite possibly a temper tantrum. Give her a couple of choices, if you can. Remember she is only trying to exert her independence and not trying to be willful. If at all possible ignore her when she tells you no, and do not let her decide on issues she does not have a choice over. Talk to her specifically in very concrete terms, easy for her to understand. try to use more positive words and let her know when she is behaving well..... Two yr. olds love to be helpers, so give her things to do so she can feel like a big girl. Teach her by being a positive role model and spend time plaing with her, letting her to be the one in charge...of the way she wants to play.

Answer 2

By not making a big fuss over it.

This is her first time to learn that words have power and she is exploring. It is up to you to set the guidelines. However, if she says no, leave it at that if you can. She will figure out that no and yes have their appropriate uses as soon as she loses out on a treat or some such.

I found that what I had at 2, I had at 12 only more complicated. Both are breaking away stages. Learning the power of self. So I tended to minimalize arguments and choose my battles carefully. Somehow, I ended up with girls that grew into their teens with minimal difficulty.

Don't worry, she will get out of it. Once my daughter at that age said NO to all food but peanut butter and bread for 6 months. Rather than fight, I just got good bread, good pbutter and with milk that was a full protein meal. It beat fighting. We would offer her what we were eating.. "nonono". Then one day she discovered avocado, a week later apples. That is just an example of how I handled the food no's.

There were also times when I just over rode protest and did what had to be done. Toss into the bath, remove wet clothing, pull out of the way of moving vehicles, that sort of thing. It all worked out fine LOL.

Wait until she asks you something REALLLLY embarrassing, in total innocence, in some very public place! LOL, you will miss the no stage!

Answer 3

Only respond to the word if it is uttered at an appropriate time.Otherwise pretend you dont notice. Ignore it. Talk about a new subject. Distract the child.
You have to be patient because it will take time to change behaviour.
It is probably good that the child has learned this word and the next word to be learnt might get on your nerves too.
Always use positive reinforcement. Praise the behaviour you want. Ignore, when you can, behaviour you dont like. Dont even respond with facial expressions. Just look away or pretend you are deaf.
If you call her to come to you and she says "no", you will just have to take her hand and walk her to where you want until she gets the picture that you wont take no for an answer.

Answer 4

In most instances they learn the "no" thing from hearing it. Your best bet is to change the way you deal with her when she is doing something wrong or getting ready to. A more positive way to handle those times is to redirect her...for instance you would say something like "instead of going through the cabinets, let's go color or read a book". And save the no's for bigger things that could cause her harm like touching the stove or running into the street.

In the meantime, you can enforce a "thinking time" where she can sit for 2 minutes and rethink telling you no. Use the counting to 3 warning to put her there. For instance "Sally, do not tell me no" if she continues to say no again start counting until you hit 3 and tell her she needs to sit down in the thinking chair and put her in the chair and once she sits quietly for 2 minutes she can leave the chair. You will have to keep putting her back in the chair and restart the timer for a little while but she will catch on and know that you now are in control and she no longer has your number. Good luck and stay consistent.

Answer 5

Teach her new words. Get a picture book, and go through it with her. Point out each of the pictures and say the words clear and loud. You can do this with things in your home, the store, etc.

Also, do not ask her yes/no questions. If you give her the opportunity to say no to something, she will. Give her choices too. When it is time to get dressed, pick out two outfits and let her pick one. If you are the one picking both them out, then you do not have to worry about coordination. When it comes to meals or snacks, give her a choice. Does she want apple or banana with lunch? Does she want Goldfish or pretzels for her snack? Does she want milk or juice to drink? Make it clear that she must choose one or the other. An answer of no means that she won’t get either.

If she broadens her vocabulary, and learns to make choices, the no should disappear. You also have to remember that she is in the terrible twos. The ‘no’ phase is hit by all of them. She will grow out of it. By starting her on the choices and increasing her vocabulary, the TERRORISTIC THREES may not be so bad.

Answer 6

You can't. Not really. I suggest when she is being stubborn and replying "NO" to everything that you respond by speaking to her as though she wasn't a 2 year old. I don't mean to speak to her as if she were an adult, but simply explain to her in terms of reason why. 1). Nobody always gets their way, or what they want 2). Neither will she, and continuing to say "NO" will not help. I believe if you do this about 20,000 times until she is about 3 years old, the concept will sink in. Co-operating with Mom is a better deal in the end than not.

Answer 7

my daughter is 20 months old. when i ask her a question, it doesn't matter what question i ask, she always says no. but, i know that she doesn't really mean it. b/c when i tell her to do it after asking her to do it, she'll do it. so, I'm not sure if she says it cause she can or cause she doesn't really know how to use the word yes.

instead of asking her to do something, demand that she do it. if you are demanding and telling her to do stuff and she is still saying no, i would ignore it and do what you think is best for her even if she says no or doesn't want to. she is probably testing the word and likes the extra "power" of the word NO.

Answer 8

A 2 yr old is gonna test the boundaries it's normal, as for getting her to stop, try explaining what the benifit is to her in doing what you say, in her terms of course.

Answer 9

Let be! No harm done: the child will get over it in due course, esp. if the word 'no' is not used too often by people around! children just tend to copy words and behaviour at this stage!

Answer 10

it's totally normal...she will get over it.....get ready, next come the throwing themselves on the ground screaming temper tantrums...those are a lot of fun...especially in public! advice for when you get to that one...let her have the tantrum....and don't give in. ...keep authority :)