Is he a player or really into me?

Question

I'm 20 years old and I work with a 30-something year old man who constantly hits on me. I'm trying to figure out if he is playing me or if he geniuely interested in me. He claims I am the only person he likes but he shows all of the signs of a player. He is very friendly, flirty, charming and sly. He knows exactly what to say and how to say it. He always asks to visit me at my house but never invites me to his, only calls from his cell phone when he is alone and doesn't want me to call him. I can't explain everything because I don't know how to but he always compliments me and is just completely charming; but I knew guys like him, players, so I'm not falling for it yet. I also overheard another guy telling him that women don't like working with him again after he went out with them (the guy that may like me). Should I be concerned that this guy is a player?

He HAS asked me out plenty of times but I always turned him down, he hasn't given up yet and this has been going on for 2 weeks. But like I said, he's very charming and attractive so I'm kinda getting interested and I probably shouldn't be. I also won't sleep with him and I've told him but he insists he doesn't care about that, doubtful but you never know.

Answer 1

-----------------Girls--------...
-----------are like apples-------------
--------on trees.The best ones-------
------are at the top of the tree.-----
----The boys dont want to reach----
---for the good ones because they ---
-are afraid of falling and geting hurt
So, they just get the rotten apples
from the ground that aren't as good,
but easy.So apples at the top think
-somethin is wrong with them,when in
--reality, they're amazing. They just
---have to wait for the right boy to---
----- come along, the one who's------
----------- brave enough to----------
-----------------climb all----------
----------------- the way--------
-----------------to the top--------
^^^^^^^^^^^of the tree.^^^^^^^

Answer 2

If he's 30, most women his age or there abouts are looking to settle down - so he probably knows or thinks that since you're slightly (ok much!) younger you're probably not.. the telling sign to me that he only sees you as sleeping material(!) is that he doesn't want you to call him - why? cause he doesn't want his friends to know?? cause he's embarassed to be with someone so much younger than him?? Those are the questions I would ask myself..

He's definitely attracted to you what you need to find out is if he respects you - take the conversation beyond compliments - that's when you'll be able to decide if the guy's into you or not - if he's not interested in talking with you, he's only in it for the sex.

Answer 3

Of course he's a player. When you were 10 he was 20 +and banging everything that moved. That said, I'm sure he likes you because he probably thinks your naive. if it is action you need, go out with this guy. If you are looking for something more, look for someone around your own age.

Answer 4

"He always asks to visit me at my house but never invites me to his, only calls from his cell phone when he is alone and doesn't want me to call him."

My coworker had that problem with a guy she used to talk to. She always joked around that he had a wife and a family. Hey.. even she never found out why he was so secretive.

If you want a normal relationship with someone who is honest and open, forget about this guy.

Answer 5

I would call him just to be a witch because he has a a wife or he has a girl and he doesn't want them to know. I would stay away from him he has player written all over his forehead. hunny you could do better then a 30 yr old. He needs to grow up and act his age so do not fall for him

Answer 6

You should always be concerned about him being a player. Just like all men you should be concerned with that.

I agree that its sort of strange its been so onesided, like he only goes to your house and not the other way around. He might be, just definitely try to get to know him better before having your heart on your sleeves. Good luck seriously.

Answer 7

At 20, I don't know if you should want more than that. He'd like to show you a good time. If you think that's cool, have a good time. I would not take this to be a serious relationship thing. Just a fling.
I'm 31 and if I were single, I'd be single the rest of my days, going from fling to fling till I got tired of it.

Answer 8

he's a player, your house not his not to much to think about and the phone. a player will do any thing and say any thing just to see if he could get in your pants its a game to him I know cuz I used to be one but then i got older im marry now and have two great kids. a players life is hard to change. beside your 20 leave it alone its better for you

Answer 9

Well, I hate to say it...but I've seen this kind of thing happen too often, and he does sound like a player. I'd be very cautious to let him get too close to me if I were you, at least until you find out more about who he really is when you are not around.

Answer 10

he is 100% player, and im even concerned if youre blind cause he does not even like you, he likes to flirt, wants to get sex from you and all you can think about is him liking you no he does not like you- if he ever were genuine he should have asked you out, and told you so, and would let you visit his house, cause he has nothing to hide, he should have been letting you call him, why else would he not want you to call him? i say he is already married or about to get married, and that kind of flirt has dozens of girls fooled, dont let him fool you, you know you deserve a better man than this dishonest man.

Answer 11

Pardon me but r you stupid? He's married or has another woman hidden somewhere. If not, why then won't he take you to his house, or give you his home phone? Hon... He's playing you and the only thing he wants to get in is your pants...