She had been into some relationship in the past, now we are serious into our relationship and planning to get married, I have heard from her and her family lots of stuffs about her past. Most of the stuffs are problem brought by her relationship with her ex's and one of them even cause her leave her parents and find an apartment for her own and it has cause lots of pain to her parents as she was only 23. She was uncontrollable that time due to their influence.
The problem i have right now is those ex's of her keeps on calling her and asking her out for drinks and meet up someitmes even barrowing money and worse is when we are out on a date. I am not happy with that and was telling her to get rid of them as they are not the type of friends that can do good for her and even for our relationship. No matter what i told her she still thinks that they are good friends and will keep them.
I have my trust in her but i do not trust her ex's who still wants to be with her. How to take it?
2007-03-18 16:48:45 · 5 answers · asked by Joe 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If she is willing to tell them in front of you that she is getting serious with YOU and they can only be friends in the future you will have to learn to live with that or find a different lady.
Some women need to still be friends with guys they have known. It is not so simple for guys I know, but women really are more sociable. Women can be "just friends" with guys. Guys are a bit more complicated than that until they are much older and can be "just friends".
Hide that jealous streak or you may lose her.
If she is still actually "dating" maybe you should lose her.
2007-03-18 17:00:27 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you have a control problem? Her past is her past and you should leave well enough alone.Hopefully she has learned from her past mistakes.Obviously you don't trust her or you wouldn't even think of bringing this up.
She has every right to have friends of her choice.If they use her she will eventually catch on and get rid of them.
And........why would you be trying to find out things about her from her family etc.that you really have no right to know.She will tell you if she wants you to know about whatever.It's not saying too much about her family either for that matter.
If you're planning on getting married then you must accept her for who she is now.Everyone has a past including you. We all have things we're not too proud of.
Could also be some jealousy going on with you??
I think you need to get this all straightened out before you ever get married. Now is the time before it's too late for both of you.
Does she know you writing this?You may want to tell her!!!
I wish both of you luck and may God Bless you both. You need it.
2007-03-18 17:10:56 · answer #2 · answered by sonnyboy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Please sit down over coffee and dessert or something with hr, and have an open, honest talk with each other on this topic. Ask her how she truly feels about these guys, and any of them borrowing money from her, taking time away form the two of you, etc. And, ask her to, how she would handle those "friends" if she were to get married to someone else, not one of them. What would she do? Etc.? Please be willing to listen, and hear what she has to say on the subject, and be willing, if needed, to end it with her if she wouldn't end those friendships after getting married to someone else. You don't need to mention your thought on marriage to her, unless youreally want to. Take care.
2007-03-18 16:56:36 · answer #3 · answered by SAK 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Put your foot down . Tell her you don't like the situation, tell her you can not put up with this situation. If she thinks they are good friends and is going to keep them . What does that make you. Do you really want to marry her.
2007-03-18 16:58:37 · answer #4 · answered by Tary L 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to give her a choice, its either you or her es boyfriends?
If she chooses them, say bye. You have to be a fool to let this go on.
2007-03-18 16:53:11 · answer #5 · answered by tbo 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋