Ever since I was a little kid, I was forced to spend Christmas, Thanksgiving and Easter with my extended family. These are people who live close by but i only see 3 times a year. I made an attempt to be friendly- wrote some emails- got not one reply, then when i see them next they make believe they never recieved it. I convinced my Mom and two brothers we should have our own X-mas , our own Holidays without them since their so phoney.. So what happened is we did for the first time say we will not be attending easter at Uncles house because were going to ROme, Italy for Easter. They are all mad and wrote a letter saying they cant believe we are doing this to them? Now my mother tells me she was always afraid of not doing what her brother wants in fear of him getting mad like this.
What does this mean? Are they jealous? controlling? do they feel that hurt?
I feel like cutting them off after this
2007-03-18 15:39:33 · 9 answers · asked by tbo 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Wow your mom caves into pressure easily.
So what if her brother is mad? Let him be mad. It's your lives and you should do what you want.
She should get mad back and let them worry about HER getting mad.
I say go to Rome and have fun and forget people who dont care about your feelings or your mothers.
2007-03-18 15:50:09 · answer #1 · answered by Dovahkiin 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
there are situations the holiday trips do no longer deliver out the perfect in people. I could admit this 3 hundred and sixty 5 days wasn't between the perfect for me the two. I had important surgical technique on Dec. 21st. domicile by the twenty 2d and having Christmas dinner at our domicile this 3 hundred and sixty 5 days. confident, my kinfolk had to be the soreness in the butt i comprehend and each so often ask your self why I handle them. lol yet, I have been given with the aid of and characteristic peace and fairly and can relax and relax over the subsequent 8 weeks of restoration. Thank the lord it in basic terms comes as quickly as a three hundred and sixty 5 days. lolololololol
2016-10-02 08:47:30 · answer #2 · answered by whitehead 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that they do have some issues going on there...it could be jealously or being controlling...but I think it is both...meshed together...
I think that it is o.k. to love from a distance...just because they are your family doesn't mean that you all have to be their punching bags...
So, take the trip...do whatever you want to do for the holidays...I think that is fair...
When you have tried, that is all that you can do...and it is probably time for you all to move on with your family plans...and enjoy each other...and enjoy life...
Maybe you all could try a pre-holiday get together so that you don't have to ruin your holidays doing what it is that others want you to do...and you can enjoy your close family...
I know how you feel...it is hard to deal with funny acting family...because you hate to be nasty...but you get tired of being run over all at the same time...
2007-03-18 15:57:37 · answer #3 · answered by LIFECOACH 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
does your extended family visit you.as far as you know maybe someone at the families house sabotage your e-mails and they did not receive them. i believe you do deserve to have a reunion with your mom and two brothers, no one should be angry they should be happy for all of you to be bonding together,your not doing anything to them ,more power to you for being independent and going to Rome, to me it does sound like they are trying to be controlling after your experience with this be a survivor of there control but i think it would be bad to cut them off . just remember in this day an age all families have someone that wants to be controlling , i would like to give you this one prayer god grant me the serenity to accept the things i cannot change the courage to change the things i can and the wisdom to know the difference . don't hold any anger or hate for them ,you must not it just puts more negative power in you ,they cant make you angry only you can make you self angry, for give them or anything in your past,present,let it all go , you want to in your heart and soul a positive attitude. half of your battle is over by getting on to the computer, its a hard job to not let anyone to take you off your square,i hope your mother ,brothers, and you mostly you a great trip ,keep your eye out for a rainbow
2007-03-18 16:39:02 · answer #4 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes traditions within family almost become "law". Don't change your plans. You should start to have your own holidays at home. As you and your two brothers begin families of your own, you'll want your own tradition...probably at your Mother's place. Or even, taking turns at who hosts each event each year.
Don't let relatives you hear from once or twice a year run your life. Live for yourselves with no apologies.
2007-03-18 16:10:27 · answer #5 · answered by NewGrandma 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should spend your holidays with whomever you choose. If you, your mom, and two brothers had wonderful holidays without them, then continue on. If they want to be a part of your family, they will start acting like family. Otherwise, they will get over it eventually.
2007-03-18 16:52:53 · answer #6 · answered by Cindy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I stopped celebrating LAST YEAR with the family that DOESN"T care about me and my family. INSTEAD I spent the whole Christmas with my husband's family...and my parents and brother. It was the best Christmas I EVER had! Make your mom stand up for her hapiness.
2007-03-19 02:11:30 · answer #7 · answered by soccersyc 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Screw them!! IF they lie and can't even email back, screw them! Enjoy your family the way you want. do feel pushed, or harrassed. Let your mom know she's doing the best thing ever by standing up to them
2007-03-18 16:28:20 · answer #8 · answered by peggin_beast 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Simple... Enjoy your holidays.. If its not enjoyable with these people, then broom them and enjoy the ones you want to be with... Its your holidays...
2007-03-18 16:13:25 · answer #9 · answered by Vindicatedfather 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋