i don't know what's wrong with me.. but i have a low self-esteem i guess, because i have low confidence. i don't know how to get it up. i've been told i'm really good looking by guys and stuff.. but i still haven't ever had a bf and i am 17. i'm shy when you first meet me, but open up once you get to know me. . . i'm really caring and trusting, which has mostly ended up hurting me, because i probably am TOO much, since i always get hurt for caring so much. and yeah.. from all this getting hurt i basically have no confidence left.. How do i get it back up? any suggestions or help.. thanks!! :)
2007-03-18 15:26:53 · 7 answers · asked by coolio 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
try and try so you can get your confidence up
you can go in a family member and release all your problems to them...
you can look in a mirror and do the things that you can't do in front of people because your shy.... you can sing, dance wacky, walk like a model, act and recite a poem... it can help increase your confidence a little....
if you think that your attitude is the one that's making boys away from you, you can ask a friend to act like you... observe if your attitude is a bad one or a good one... if its to bad change it... if its to good, and it makes you look like crazy, change it.... ( that's what i did )
good luck!!!
2007-03-18 15:56:49 · answer #1 · answered by cute_kuxy 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well, its hard to say, things like, parental influence or how much attention you were given when growing up, what were some of your first relationships like, what phases you went through, if you were well accepted in school, around you neighborhood... etc, all these things will affect you esteem, your friends now how they treat you, you current stress level, how you are doing in school... you say you are hurt alot because of your trustingness i would say that the pain you say you endured would make you less trusting, not so much low selfesteem... so i would say it comes from some other area... this also depends on how they hurt you... if you trusted them with something your insecure with about yourself and they made fun of or told others... anyway, this topic needs more attention to detail, but this would take more trust and you would probably be best you talked to someone you do trust.... but for now, i would say that you might need friends that do support you, or tell yourself you do look good, or realize that just because you haven't dated anyone yet doesn't mean jack, it just means no one you know has pursuaded you to date, 50% of girls, and 40% of guys graduate high school without ever having a date .... yo are young and still have time left... figure out what about yourself you do like, things you like to do and focus and do them, don't worry about such nominal things as having a boyfriend, if things go according to plan you only need one anyway... and he's the one you marry why waste time worring about dating for the heck of it.... let the right guy find you, and i am positive you will know... good luck!!!
STAY POSITIVE!!!
-Todd
2007-03-18 15:47:03 · answer #2 · answered by todd w 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i am a psychology major and you probably know that i am gonna say that you need to think back to your younger years or maybe you already know from what tramatic or life changing experience this lack of confidence stems from. that is my only explanation because you have already said that you receive compliments on your apperience so we know that you are not growing any teeth out the side of your head!!! but seroiusly do some heavy mind searching and then you can take steps from there to help resolve the issues that are causing you to hold back.
2007-03-18 15:36:12 · answer #3 · answered by tripcollegedizzy 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well just think of all the nice complements you have gotten. and 17 is young so who cares if you never had a bf! just make sure not to be a pushover when being nice to people so they wont walk all over you. just try to overcome your shyness, and start talking to guys more!
Good luck!
2007-03-18 15:31:24 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Focus on building a social network - Girls as well as boys.
You could also try taking some acting classes to become more poised.
2007-03-18 15:30:05 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Practice, practice, practice. And keep in mind that you WILL at times embarrass yourself. But you'll be happy with the end results...promise.
2007-03-18 15:30:54 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have to find the strenght in you its there. if you never try you will always fail just go for it and do it. good luck
2007-03-18 16:40:05 · answer #7 · answered by darthdread13 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋