What prevents you from commiting suicide?

Question

I would and am more than ready to kill myself. I've been obsessed with the idea for some time now. There's too much wrong in this world and I'd rather just let it end now before I see more. Except, I can't leave my mother. My mom would die if something happened to me. Even faking my death as an accident, it'd be too much and I can't do that to her. Now I feel some resentment towards her almost, like I just want to crawl in a hole and die alone, and she's stopping me. I don't think I'll ever get rid of this feeling, I mean maybe it's depression but how I see the world won't change. Is this normal? Do you seriously consider suicide but not actually do it because someone cares about you? Or are we supposed to want to live? I'm clearly confused and I know this sounds ridiculous, but I'm wondering if there's some truth to it.

Answer 1

The only reason I'm still alive is because of my children and I know that no one would ever love and care for them as much as I do. I could never do that to them. If it weren't for them I would have been gone a long time ago.

Answer 2

I honestly think the fact that I am a woman helped me not commit suicide.

I think men have more pressure with their careers. Women are judged less on their material success (although they are judged harshly on looks.)

I think I could embrace survival day-by-day just staring at the wall... for years on end... because I didn't put extreme pressure on myself to succeed. I allowed myself to fail.. I accepted failure... in a way I don't think I personally could if I was a man.

"I don't think I'll ever get rid of this feeling."

Perhaps give it 15 years. Feelings can change.

As to the world not changing, there is a story about rescuing a dog. (I think the original story was about a starfish, but I don't completely remember that one.)

One man said, "So many have dogs have died in puppy mills. 500,000 puppies from puppy mills are sold each year.

You are just one little effort against the world. Just one small dog was rescued out of hundreds of thousands. What you do doesn't matter."

And the man who was rescuing the animal said, "It mattered to this one."

And a change may be extremely miniscule... but it mattered to the one you rescue.

Are we supposed to live? To that I'm not sure, I'm not the kind of person who is against suicide. To me it is a choice, a free choice. Free will... but I think there is great depth to living through the years. There is great wisdom of old age... and I hope to experience the changes of time.

Answer 3

although there is so much wrong in this world, you have to keep in mind that there is also alot of right in this world too.its not normal for you to be feeling so down, have you spoken to your doctor. there are people who can help you feel better.you are not hear to save the world, thats too much on anyones shoulders. forget about the condition of the world,,just think about yourself. no mother should ever bury their child . your sound like you have a good heart, but you need to find happiness and bring it into your life, if you have'nt a friend to talk to, then go out and find one, join a club, is there something you enjoy doing? it's your deppression that is magnifying your problems, keep active if possible. im sure your a lovely person and you certainly are not alone in the way you are feeling, there are so many other people out there that feel the same way.keep strong, keep thinking about all the beautiful things in this world. remember god wants you in this world, so does your mum and so do i. good luck sweetie.

Answer 4

I would have packed it in a long time ago if I hadn't felt "Is this all there is, or is there something better to come?" What really matters is that you care about you and what happens to you. It might be worth it to talk to one of your close friends or even a counselor to sort out your feelings on your feelings regarding suicide.