ok, here's the deal, we've been together almost 10 years, and it was just to the point neither of us was really happy anymore, well.. I had just gotten it through to my "heart" that the best thing to do was leave...and I found out I am preggers. I was sick of being ignored, and unappreciated, and had told him numerous times, to no avail... NOW, he's trying to be nice b/c of the baby.. WHAT DO I DO ??????
I am soooo confused. any ideas out there ???
2007-03-18 14:29:10 · 9 answers · asked by Miss B 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I would definitely consider counseling... It's good to see that he's treating you better since the baby is coming but that's not enough to make a relationship work.
Some might disagree, but you still need to consider your own happiness. Even with the baby, you could still have a civil relationship with him, with the agreement that you two are parents and not "lovers/dating".
It's true that sometimes a baby will make a guy turn around but I would definitely work with a therapist so that you two will have a better foundation for your new baby.
Congratulations on your new little one and best of luck.
Mon :-)
2007-03-18 14:37:21 · answer #1 · answered by santan_cat 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can always give the relationship a little longer and see if things really do change. If not, you can leave then. But unless you are very, very certain you will be happy, if he asks, don't marry him.
Are you in a job where you can support a child on your own? Many women do and are very happy. If not, you can give your child and a desperate couple all a chance at a happy home life by putting the child up for adoption. You can have a semi-open adoption so you don't know where the couple lives but on Birthdays and Christmas you get pictures forwarded via social services.
If you want your baby, you'll find a way. Just don't get yourself trapped in a relationship that's going nowhere fast. Good luck.
2007-03-18 21:36:14 · answer #2 · answered by NewGrandma 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why weren't you happy any longer? Evaluate those reasons and see if you can make it work. You're going to need support both emotionally and financially in the next few months. If he's willing to provide what you need, hang on to him.
You need to define what you mean by ignored and unappreciated. Women often expect too much from their men. Think about it.
2007-03-18 21:33:08 · answer #3 · answered by Blue 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Speaking as a single mom it is hard but it can be done. Truthfully deep down I'd love to be able to share it with someone. Maybe he just needed a wake up call. You could give it a try and then if it doesn't work you know you can do it on your own because God never gives us more than we can handle and you're never alone.
2007-03-18 21:36:09 · answer #4 · answered by J P 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stay with him. It will be better for you and the child in the long run. From what I've heard, sometimes men need to become fathers to grow up and start concentrating on their families instead of partying and hanging out with their friends all the time. I sure hope so :-P
2007-03-18 21:33:47 · answer #5 · answered by Elise 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try to work things out , after 10 years you must have something going well in the relationship .Perhaps the child will strengthen your relationship.
2007-03-18 21:32:58 · answer #6 · answered by Heads up! 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe this baby will keep you together. Give it another try, put your all into it. If it doesn't work out, at least you can really look at your baby and say you tried.
2007-03-18 21:33:06 · answer #7 · answered by btjuana 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stick it out & make it work!!! It's not just the 2 of you anymore...you have to think about what's best for the baby!!!
2007-03-18 21:32:55 · answer #8 · answered by !Sweetie! 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow that's tough, that's why you shouldn't have kids unless you are married in a stable relationship.
2007-03-18 21:33:33 · answer #9 · answered by Vegas 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋