Do I have to talk to apartment neighbours, even nosey ones?

Question

I live in an aprtment building with 25 apartments, everyone pretty much minds their own business. There are a couple of neighbours who are very nosey. I used to feel a long time ago that I had to drop everything and talk to them, now i feel ashamed i gave out info to them. I just want to come and go and not talk to anyone, I have nothing in common with these people. I have had a job that starts at 6am and i come back around 10 pm.. One nosey lady has asked my roommate if im still living here about 10 times already... When i see her outside I wont even go into the building because she tries to get info out of me..
I even listen at my door to make sure no one is outside, if they are i will wait till they leave. I have avoided them this way.. Am I being rude? How can I handle these people without them prying into my life and asking me personal questions?
I want them to know nothing about me.

Answer 1

Havent they ever heard about personal space and minding their business? You owe nothing to these people! They are just nosey people who have entirely too much time on there hands. When ever they approach you and try to squeeze out information from you you have too choices: You can suffer and engage in conversation with them or... you can tell them "Please, I work 6am-10pm and I am very tired. I really just want to go to my apartment and unwind". After saying that over and over again, they will just learn to leave you alone. If you want to be really straight foward just simply say "It is none of your business". THe solution is clear. Chances are the problem is not going to solve itself and it is up to you to get some thick skin and face it head on. Your life is your life and no boy should be trying to pry into you life

Answer 2

You are not required to give out information about yourself to anybody. I hate to say it, but it sounds like your past response may have encouraged them. I don't know them obviously, but they may not be nosy, just lonely: many people who live in apartments - as well as houses - are. And if they think they have somebody to chat with, they may be just throwing in all the gusto they have.

So, I don't think you need to give them your life or even day's story. On the other hand, I do think you should at least acknowledge their existence - not to do so would be rude. You don't necessarily have to have anything in common to do this minimal interaction, since you're really just acknowledging them as a fellow human being. All you have to do is say "Hello, how are you." Note the lack of question mark. It is not a question, it's a statement, a clear nicety not meant to solicit information.

If they press you, say "Sorry, I'm in a big hurry"; said as you're walking away gives the idea without being rude, since everybody's in a hurry now and then. After 10 or 15 times of you always being in a hurry, I think they will get the picture without undue resentment.

Answer 3

We live in a condo of 76 units. We are friendly with our neighbours but that is
as far as it goes. With nosy neighbours you sometimes have to get tough. You
don't owe them or anyone else anything. I have Dystonia, a fun disease that mimics Parkinsons without the death sentence. One woman use to trap me wherever she found me and asked does it hurt, etc. She did this in front of anyone that was around. One day she came to my door and I assumed she was coming in for tea. Surprise, she started in on me again. This time I asked her to leave by gently pushing her towards the door & shutting and locking it. She was in her 80's but just didn't use common sense. When her husband
died she moved out for which I was thankful. Be friendly but that's all you need
to be. Like I said you owe them nothing. By the way it's not you that is being
rude, they are. I hope you find a way to solve this as you shouldn't have to hide
or try to avoid them.

Answer 4

In most cases I would say that you should always be polite to your neighbours - even if it only means saying hello/good morning when you see them but it sounds in your particular case that you have some very rude neighbours. You are not being rude no. You have no reason to give out your personal infomration. maybe this lady in particular needs to be told to stop stricking her nose in. Just becasue you live around them doesn't mean they have to be your best buds!

Answer 5

You wouldn't be rude at all.
One trick I have learned, is that you never stop. You can say "Hi, how are you?" and keep walking. When you stop, that gives the impression you're available to chat.
If you do get caught simply say you're sorry but you're busy and have to run.

Answer 6

I'm disabled so I have a short temper and my neighbors are always pissing me off. Screw your neighbors. Tell them to stick it where the sun don't shine. They don't give me any special treatment because i'm in a wheelchair, just more lip service. And let me tell you, lip service is not what I want to hear. I bought one of those $12.95 airhorns in a can from Walmart. Everytime they piss me off, I come out of my apartment and knock om their door. When they answer, I blow the horn right in their face and tell them where to go. If they don't answer the door, they will hear the horn at 3am. I don't work so I don't mind staying up.

Answer 7

You are not being rude in any sort of way. She is being too intrusive and you are doing the only thing you can really do. As for what you can do, I don't think there is really anything that you can do.

Answer 8

why are you to afraid to tell them to mind their own business?

dont be.

just straight up tell them to don't worry about it. sounds like you have some kind of disorder were you are afraid of confrontation.

Answer 9

No, you don't have to talk to anyone. Your life is none of their business.