I need some advice from women AND men! PLEASE help...?

Question

Hi, my name is Jazmine. I'm 15, and i am having a difficult time with a guy that i have like for a while now. I've been told i'm very mature for a 15 year old and this is a serious situation that i need advice on. I met the guy about 6 months ago. He introduced himself, shook my hand :), gave me his name and number. We set up a date to hang out, and it was great! I really felt a connection between me and him.Hetold me he was 20 :-/ BUMMER....But some of my friends told me there was nothing wrong with this Plus i really like this guy!Anyway, i have been waiting for the relationship term to be brought up, but it hasn't. All that has come up is the sex discussion.He keeps bringing it up! I hate to think that he is just trying to have sex with me,plus im not that type of girl,im saving it for marriage. He invites over to his house ALOT when he's ALONE. Someone smart on yahoo warned me about him n told me what he's doing can fall into staturary RAPE. WOW, that scared me. I need advice..

Answer 1

You are right, he wants your body. That is all that he wants. My advice to you is, if you want to save yourself for your husband, then, you better stay away from this dude. Have you heard of the date rape drug?? Be very careful what you are setting yourself up for.. He is a little too old for you anyways..His ideas are very different from yours..

Answer 2

Drop him. NOW. I'm sorry if you feel that this is offensive, but there is absolutely nothing that a 15 year old girl and a 20 year old guy can do that won't include sex. He's made it clear to you that sex is all he wants, but for some reason, you're not wanting to accept the facts in front of you.

Being with a 15 year old girl is illegal for him and I doubt that he's only 20. He's probably more like 23 or 24. Ask yourself why a 20 year old guy needs to try and get a 15 year old girl over his house and tries to talk about sex with her? Obviously, girls his own age won't have anything to do with him, and for good reason. This guy isn't your friend. He doesn't care about you, no matter how cool you are. And that's not a slight against you, it's just how it is. Cutting off contact is the safest thing to do. And by no means should you ever be alone with him. All he wants is to sleep with you and then he'll be on to the next young girl who is willing to fall for his act.

The world is full of men like him. And an awful lot of them end up in jail. Watch "To Catch a Predator" on NBC this week, and I think you'll be shocked at just how often these men try this particular crime.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/10912603/

Good luck and be careful.

Answer 3

Jazmine, here is my advice..... You may be a mature 15 but you are still 15. Women in their 40's (like myself) still get fooled sometimes by men and we have some experience to draw on. Steer clear of this fellow especially since he is bringing up physical intimacy. And take this from an old lady, 20 year old men don't want relationships with 15 year old girls, they want what you are saving for marriage. Be careful and hang out with more age appropriate people.

Answer 4

What would you like to hear? The truth, no 20 yr old guy wants a relationship with a 15 yr old kid (no matter how mature you are). This is a crime and he can be arrested. This guy is a sick man (pet a file) no matter how nice you think he is. What advice are you looking for you know this is not good, and before you end up raped or dead I would not see this guy anymore. If you want a boyfriend I am sure there are many High School guys you can date where your life would not be at risk.

Answer 5

Keep your morals and convictions and see about finding someone else to hang out with. This guy doesn't sound like someone who can care about you in the slightest, and as hard as that sounds, looking the truth in the face is the best thing you can do. Waiting until you're married is more than just smart... it can save your life. I would avoid being alone with the guy, and if you have to do things in the same proximity and it HAS to be alone for some reason (though there usually isn't a good one)... TELL someone you can be accountable to where you'll be. Find someone to be your accountability partner on this, and whatever else might come up... and be hers for her stuff. And if you both believe in God... it's a better bond still than just accountability. We're all accountable to God... but sometimes, it takes a little extra someone He puts in out lives to help us out.

Answer 6

5 years is a lot when you're that young. I'm 14, and if i was in that position i was say step away. He's too old, and if he tries to put a move on you, and you say no, he could take advantage of you. I know three people who were in high school and got raped. Not fun, I hated seeing them go through that. Stay away from him

Answer 7

i understand your a mature 15 year old and you sound like it to but it also takes growing up and experience to understand the mind of a guy honestly if he's bringing up the subject of sex to you its obvious of what he wants. guys are idiots most of the time they want sex and your "innocence" its what they crave the most. he hasnt even asked you about a relationship and if you ask him why he doesnt and why he only talks about sex he'll try to change it up all of a sudden and "pretend" to be in a relationship with you so that he can get you to fall for him and have sex...date someone younger less experienced because older guys have had time to practice and master the skill of gettting girls to do what they want even if it means lying or saying "i love you" also he wants you at his house when no one is around because he wants to have sex with you. trust me you dont want to lose your virginity to some idiot with a d*ck he cant control. take care of yourself and be smart. =)

Answer 8

number one you are too young to be thinking about a relationship. number two that can fall into rape because he's five years older than you . last he is only after you for sex think about your 15 his 20 what can you do for a grown man?

Answer 9

I think if he was intending to rape you, he would have done so by now. So if you know him well, there's nothing wrong with seeing him as long as you have discussed your sexual abstinence with him and he agrees to live within your intentions.

My first experience (13) was with a much older guy (28), in a situation similar to yours. But I had no plans for abstinence and when he kissed me... it just took off from there in the following days. He never forced me and I never stopped him. I've never regretted it, but sometimes I think about what he might have done, had I said no. I believe in my heart he would have stopped. He was a nice guy and I still have great feelings for him.

So give him a break. Not all guys are rapists. But as a disclaimer, I neither encourage or discourage you from seeing him. That's entirely up to you. Your mileage might vary.

Answer 10

this guy just wants to get into your pants, and, he knows he risks jail, if he is trying to. If you go out with him, or enter his house,,you have pretty much given the go ahead, for him to expect sex from you. I appreciate your morals,,but, you also need to apply common sense. You did not mention one reason why you would consider going out with this guy, so, maybe there is none. If my grand daughter went out with a guy like that, ( she is 14), I would castrate him) This guy does not want you,,he wants what you hide in your panties! Stick closer to your age, and be sure to let them know how you feel about your morals, if they mention sex. If that is all they want, they will find some one else to play with.