Help me deal with this guy......?

Question

I have met this guy :) he is almost too good to be true! the only thing that troubles me is that he is always talking about their past exploits, which includes relationships/ex girlfriends /girls who he almost got it on with (which it seems to be a lot of), and past 'shady dealings'. Also, they also he always talks about how everyone is always chatting him up!! I am not sure how I should deal with this (i am not jealous, I just find it odd), I have never really come across people who talk like this - is this normal? Its been a good few years since I was last in a relationship, that I have almost forgotten what its like?! :)

Answer 1

If he seems to good to be true then he probably is! Sounds like he is needing to prove to you that he is attractive, which could indicate low self esteem. Why does he need to tell you all this? Anyone who is self assured and comfortable with themselves wouldn't. They are definately red flags, proceed with extreme caution!!! xx

Answer 2

First of all, you're right to go with your instincts. There is something unusual about the way he is giving you this information. He could visit a therapist if he wants to explore past relationships rather than boring you with the details. I'm sure he could provide you with more stimulating conversation.

You could use non-verbal communication to let him know you're absolutely not interested. e.g. look bored, don't ask questions avoid eye contact. If that doesn't work then let him know that you're not interested in his past exploits and that you'd prefer to hear more about what you will be doing together. It's worth giving him some positives and praising him for good things e.g. when he talks about how good you look etc

Good luck!

Answer 3

I don't know you so I can't say anything for certain but it's likely that this guy really likes you and therefore in a very immature, schoolboy way he his trying to impress you into thinking that he's really popular and 'edgy' and therefore this guy is just probably very inexperienced. I would just give it a little time and take it easy, if you both relax and get into each other he might realise that he doesn't need to be someone else to impress you enough to stay with him (yes it does boil down to insecurity) and this should stop. One word of warning, if what he is saying is really true then it could be a big big problem!

Answer 4

whooooahhhhh hold it right there

seriously....... do you really want to be with this guy?????? why would you want to be with a guy who had had a lot of g/fs or one night stands??

shady dealings??????? wake up girl........... alarm bells must surely be ringing... if he has to boast about past girlfriends then he obviously isnt the kind of guy who can hold a relationship down... either that or he gets a kick out of gathering more notches on his bed post.... sdo yuo want to be a notch on a bed post and the subject of discussion with his next girlfriend????

he may be charming and funny..... guys like him usually are....they make you feel good cos they flirt with you and the attention is great for a while . but get real..... learn to like yourself.......and look for a guy who can make you his world.

the fact that you havent been in a relationship worries me a little bit.... please do not jump into a relationship through lonliness..... it wont work out... go out more... join groups... or do soem volunteering work... anything to get you out meeting people. youll find that your confidence will soar and mr right will come nocking on your door

good luck :)

Answer 5

He sounds like a loser, I'm a guy and as far as I'm concerned anyone who brags about past exploits is usually talking crap. If he is talking about past shady dealings he will get involved in that sort of thing again. You can do better, don't get involved. DUMP HIM!!!!!!!!!!!

Answer 6

Watch out, this guy sounds like a smooth talker who is only out for one thing. this kind of person is a freind to nobody who will use you and chuck you when hes done with you. BE VERY CAREFUL. this guy could easily break your heart. If somebody makes you. If he is always talking about one girl in particuler he more than likely still has feelings for her, so maybe some jealousy is in order. It wouldnt hurt to confront him about this REMEMBER, communication is key in any relationship

Answer 7

two things he's either just a bragger and wants to show off, therefore you need to think about whether you want to be with him as he should want you and just you and not have to go on about his past. eventually you might find yourself comparing yourself which is not what you want to be doing. you need to remain who you are be accepted as that.

secondly, he might just be feeling a bit insecure if you are at the beginning of this relationship and its just his different way of dealing with his nerves/issues.

sit down and talk to him about it, see how he reacts. communication is the key to a successfull and true relationship. good luck

Answer 8

He's a big-headed bum, chauvinist p*g, he loves himself so much there's nothing left to share with someone else. He hardly ever scores, because boys that do, keep it respectable and private (or they should). Give yourself to this bum, and you have given yourself to the entire neighbourhood, school, church, etc, everyone will know what has happened and where and when it has happened - even your parents.

Rather hold on (for another few years if you have to) but dump this bum.

Answer 9

This is not normal. It almost sounds like he is trying to make himself sound desireable because maybe in reality, he is a loser. He's trying to make you feel lucky that you are the girl that he is with, because of how many other girls are supposedly after him. I wouldn't settle for a guy like that at all.

Answer 10

Tell him you're just not interested in hearing about his past 'conquests' or shady dealings. He sounds a real bore, with personality issues. Are you sure he's your type?