I had to tell my family to back off and even moved away. I set bounderies for how I felt mistreated and set bounderies for how they were treating my young children. It became so messy, I moved away. Now, 9 months later, my confidence is rising, my kids are happier and expressive (and even dont' have tantrums anymore!) They are hurt and think I am so wrong (as usual) but the facts speak for themselves.
I am scared sometimes as single mom... what if I need them? But I won't ever put myself in the place to NEED someone who has to hurt me to help me again. For the first time I realize. I am the mom. This is MY daughter. MY son. I feel like we are a true family unit and deserve respect as a family.
Has anyone else had to just wing it.. leave their family behind.. hope that you did the right thing. And the result of that was that your life got so much better that you KNOW you did the right thing and their guilt trips and temper tantrums back home have lost their power?
2007-03-18 08:24:55 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
don't feel guilty of what you did or said your're happy with your children and above all not stress anymore for having someone always on your back.GOD will take care of you he knows what you need forget the past and think about your children.you have your own life to live you don't have to worry about them cause it will stress you ,for asking and giving answer to yourself ,move forward.good luck.
2007-03-18 08:35:54 · answer #1 · answered by emma 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm very proud of you! I had to do the same thing too, I kept away from my parents (and kept them away from my baby daughter) for nearly a year.
I have boundaries now and they still sometimes break them and I call them on it if I feel it's important enough and I stay away from them again for a while if I just don't want to deal with them.
You did the right thing! I bet you feel so much stronger now!
2007-03-18 08:30:06 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
What you did is fine.....I didn't talk to my parents for 20 years and didn't think I could ever have a relationship with them, but to my surprise, we speak now through emails and I have an independent, separate life from theirs. My older brothers, in their 40's, are still very much dictated to by them. You'll always love your family, but sometimes you need space to be able to raise your own, and family tends to be "too honest" which can be hurtful.
2007-03-18 09:02:40 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow. thats good that your independent. But truth is, I havent had to leave my family. And if they hurt you do bad, maybe it is good that you are away.
I know I couldnt leave my family, because I know that they are the only true love I have. I may fall in love with a guy one day, but he may not be there for me forever like my family will, and I wouldnt want to be alone in the world, with just me and my children. Id want someone to be there for me, like I would be there for my children. My only permanent love is my family. Good luck
2007-03-18 08:32:32 · answer #4 · answered by just a girl 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I did a similar thing. They wanted to be too nosey and tell me how to live, but did not want to help me live in the lifestyle they thought was acceptable, so I moved to another state and made my own life. Now I know I can do anything and do not need anyone's help.
2007-03-18 08:32:36 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
WOW...I actually have not in any respect heard that music earlier, and that i have were given to assert that that's between the most particularly acceptable songs I actually have ever heard. thanks for sharing that one babes - i'm kinda a touch unhappy now after listening to that :0( *composes myself*....and to respond to your question, I actually have made and damaged any such vast volume of pomises to myself that its no longer humorous. i imagine all of us do it each each now and then in our lives.....you basically ought to %. your self up and dirt your self off. attempt back next time and with any success you'd be sturdy adequate to save that promise....it doesnt make you a failure, basically signifies that per chance the situations or the enticements were to effective to lead away from. basically dont provide up on believing in your self, and each thing will be ok in the accurate.
2016-12-02 04:39:56 · answer #6 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, I was in the same situation. Now years later. I can communicate with them without a big arguement but It was scary and hard not to call them when I needed something I knew they could fix easily. But you have to do it for you and for your kids.
2007-03-18 08:29:23 · answer #7 · answered by Nette 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you made an excellent choice. The title "Family" does not automatically mean they are what is best for you. Your "family" is your children! Good choice!
2007-03-18 08:29:30 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't care what other people think especially when it comes to my kids. It's my way or the highway for anyone that tries to run my life.
2007-03-18 08:46:19 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋