2 years ago my husband cheated ending my marriage. I met a man 9 months ago. He was loving & understanding.seemed besotted by me.one night he said do you want to have a baby with me. We had unprotected sex. This happened twice. When I told him I was pregnant he was surprised and said he had withdrawn before he came. He asked me to have an abortion.I miscarried. We cont.. to see each other but I was emotionally up and down. He wasnt understanding. The other day he stopped contacting me and has completely ignored me. Although knowing the relationship was wrong for me. I just wanted some kind of dissusion about closure. I sent a couple of emails I tried to be very polite & articulate even when discussing my hurt. Being sensitive this has really hurt me.the silence is just horrible. My trust of men is at an all time low. Why would someone who seemed so in love be so cruel? How do I overcome the mistrust I feel?
2007-03-18 07:18:59 · 22 answers · asked by Bridget A 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Dump him! He's messing you around...
2007-03-18 07:23:05 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Believe me babes, you are well rid of this one. You just got unlucky in your choice of men; what a hard time you have had; the loss of your baby, and that creep leaving you to face the music alone.
Been there , done that.
Give yourself time to heal, and get stronger, inside and out. Try and develop a sense of your own self worth; when you value yourself, you will not allow this to happen again. Next time you meet someone, you will hold back a part of yourself. That is so important; it will help preserve your self respect. And as I know only too well, getting pregnant will not hold a guy if he has no plans to stay. You may never lose your mistrust, but that is no bad thing; it will just make you more wary next time.
2007-03-18 07:29:31 · answer #2 · answered by marie m 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel your pain and in order to overcome the mistrust you have to be open an receptive to another man. Maybe not right now but in due time. Not all men are non supportive and selfish stop writing to that idiot instead give yourself your undivided attention. You have a good heart and wholesome winning ways you certainly deserve someone who is going to have your best interest at heart.
2007-03-18 07:34:43 · answer #3 · answered by Aphreakywuman 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Men will say or do almost anything to have unprotected sex. Thats what Mother Nature designed them to do - spread the good DNA and propagate the species. Its nature.
Women are attracted to virile men. They want to build a nest for their babies.
It is unfortunate that many virile men are not much interested in making a nest. Have a look at animals, almost none of them mate for life. Humans are animals and civilization, morals and religion are but a light skin of paint over the top.
Next time a male says "Baby" to you just say "Ring".
2007-03-18 07:29:01 · answer #4 · answered by jinoturistica 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm very sorry about everything that has happened to you. I was in a similar situation, but not to that degree. My suggestion is to just cut him out of your life. Anyone who can cause you that much pain is not worth your time. Honey, you are way better off without him. A true man who is in love with you will always contact you, say he loves you and make you feel good about yourself all the time.
Men are very hard to understand. The man you were with could have just pretended to be in love with you so you would stay off his back. I personally think he was cheating on you. To get over it, get all of his stuff that is in your posession and burn it, trash it, sell it, whatever. Or you can write down all of the things that you hate about him and burn it. It worked for me.
2007-03-18 07:27:10 · answer #5 · answered by half_pint122000 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some people can still love/be in love but be destructive in relationships. YOu need to decide whether you want to be a part of a destructive relationship considering how low he has already made you, plus if you are deciding not to be with him, perhaps think about no contact with him.
Plus can I just add that even if a man withdraws you can still get prgenant. Pre-*** contains sperm. I work in sexual health services so be reassured I know.
2007-03-20 13:56:16 · answer #6 · answered by danni d 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This guy you got involved with, he sounds like he may be bipolar, or mentally ill ... I think you should be thanking your stars he isn't that interested and forget him, he wasn't stable. Don't give up, you were just unfortunate. Next time, wait a year or so before deciding to become pregnant with someone.
Oh, and I'm sorry for your loss, a miscarriage is very sad, and it sounds like you had to cope with it alone. My sympathy, my sister had to go through the same thing.
2007-03-18 08:10:18 · answer #7 · answered by Orla C 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am going through a break up too and it is tough, you really need to take things one step at a time. You have had two bad experiences this doesn't mean that next time things won't work out though. You need to stay positive and next time things will get better! I think you need to get closure, but don't break down in front of him. Stay strong!
2007-03-18 07:25:00 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some men are just like that, they cant bear confrontation and facing things head on. they just creep away. Youre better off without him, hold you head up, he's just hiding under his stone. Pity his next victim. Realise that you wont ever get an answer from him and move on, I know this hard but give yourself time, keep busy and trust in good friends to get you through this. good luck.
2007-03-18 07:25:35 · answer #9 · answered by Sugarlump 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Old old story. It hurts so much. Learn to love you because you are nice. Don't look to a man to give you happiness or fulfilment. Find it for yourself. One day he'll arrive you won't be looking and you won't be trusting. It will happen, when you least expect. Don't try to trust he'll win it. Pretty words are cheap. Good men are there and having a sh*t time too. Be happy.
2007-03-18 07:34:14 · answer #10 · answered by oldmum 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're far too understanding! why bother being polite and articulate tell him what you really feel. It won't have any effect on him as it sounds as if he is completely self centred; however it will make you feel a lot better.
Be more assertive, you can only be a victim if you allow yourself to be!
2007-03-18 07:32:15 · answer #11 · answered by Safety First 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋