I've been in a strange relationship with a man for a year and a half. We've been having sex and all the other things that couples do but, he views our relationship as just friends? That really bothers me and to top it off now he wants to stop having sex because its wrong. He thinks that because we aren't married he can't accomplish anything in his life because he isn't "living right". I honestly don't think there is someone else, because I know WAY more about him than he thinks I do. So, help!!! Would you stick with a man that won't have sex with you or would you say goodbye and be on your way? HELP??!!!! I really do love him and want to spend the rest of my life with him, but is ALL this worth it?
2007-03-18 07:14:07 · 18 answers · asked by madamebutterfly72 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If he can't commit to you after a year of having a "relationship" with you..what are you holding onto? You may know tons about him but what does he know about you? Whatever he does know it isn't really important to him proven by his actions. He seems really selfish and self-centered. Everything is about what works best for him when he wants it. You give it to him for the hopes that he will give you want you want eventually. You deserve it now! It's not a strange relationship. It's actually very typical and crystal clear. A long time ago he found a way to control your mind and allow you to give your all with him not really giving anything but his time. He doesn't love you or he would want to make you happy as well. It's not about the sex. Somehow he's got you so twisted you're experiencing such anxiety over sex and sex isn't really what you want from him, is it? Why would he not marry you and make things right. Rather that have you out on a limb. My best advice is to say goodbye..spend some time alone and start over. You deserve the best! Don't settle for someone like him again it only brings you down.
2007-03-18 07:24:26 · answer #1 · answered by Bonita Applebaum 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Seems to me you don't know him as well as you think you do. You said you've been having sex for a year and all of sudden he gives you this lame excuse about not living right. The guilt he's expressing is coming from somewhere but not your relationship. A guy just doesn't do that. Guys don't give up having sex because they feel funny, that's a chick thing to do.
2007-03-18 07:22:08 · answer #2 · answered by SusiQ 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First off,Give him the choice.Either your going to be with me or not.He is the one who left you on a lem with the one year and a half relationship.To be honest regardless of you saying that there is no one else in his life.You are wrong.Do you know how I know.He is feeling upset about how he has treated you and made up a big excuse about not having sex.He might have converted but it doesn't mean that he could not decided on weather or not to be more than friend with you.THAT IS MY OPINION ON THAT PART.Yall don't have to have sex to have a relationship.So give him one last chance and give him a week to come to a decision.
2007-03-18 07:25:30 · answer #3 · answered by jany50002002 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sex isn't everything. Why don't you both trying being celibate and focus more on the mental and emotional part of the relationship instead of just the physical. It'll bring you two closer together.
And if he wants to stop having sex, don't punish him for it. Just respect his space and he will realize that you love him even more.
2007-03-18 07:21:01 · answer #4 · answered by half_pint122000 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i honestly wouldnt leave a guy who doesnt want to have sex with me cuz we aint married, (if im sure theres no other girl around) i think he's sacrificing too cuz come on hes a guy n has needs. theres times when i have asked my bf to stop having sex til we get married but neither one can hold on to what we say. i think its really nice that he wants to respect his beliefs. in the other hand i would leave him for considering the relationship has friends only, you need to talk to him n ask him what he feels towards you. then make your choice
2007-03-18 07:20:31 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Get yourself together and leave this guy. He is obviously playing stupid games with you and don't want to commit to you.
Move on, he isn't worth your love or a fraction of a second that you spend with him. You are way more precious than he is.
Find someone who loves you as a partner and a lover, and sees his future with you.
2007-03-18 07:19:43 · answer #6 · answered by peachy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well--i may be qa very suspicious person --but my guess is that he is tired of you and wants to move onto his next target--sounds to me like he would be the type that goes from woman to woman --doesnt want only one --if he is serious about sex not being right then he should have asked you to marry him if he loves you--sorry to say but i really feel this guy has taken advantage of you .
I hope that i am wrong and good luck to you--and again---if he doesnt marry you get rid of him
2007-03-18 07:29:18 · answer #7 · answered by willtdn 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
AHHHHHHHHHHHH! The signs of a mentally imbalanced man!
I have had a few of these wishy washy men in my life.
Christian beliefs play a small roll in their behaviors. But to view you as just a friend, is asinine! He's just played you out for sex.
Time to move on Hun.
Take care
Good Luck!
2007-03-18 07:20:55 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
if you really love him then sex should not be that important. you already know that the sex is good so what do you have to lose. stick by him until he comes to his senses or until he eventually pops the question. there are many ways that you can please yourself, try buying some toys.
2007-03-18 07:20:57 · answer #9 · answered by Star 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its not worth it, if u've been with him 4 over a year and he views your relationship as "just friends" :/
how is it that he doesnt view u as his Gf?
maybe he found someone else..
move on, there are plenty fish in the sea.
2007-03-18 07:19:13 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋