We been together 3 years, 2 years long distant relationship. Last July we bought a house together. The last few months have been tough, first time I have lived away from my mum, plus lost my Gran. Yesterday after we talked he said he gets depressed about the realtionship how often we have sex,1 a week(he work nights), how he does not show me enough attention. We went out for rugby & to a concert I bought tickets ages ago. We had a great night, he was touchy, told me he thought I was beautiful, grab my hand when crossing road. We went home spent the night avoid touching each other - this morning I could tell he was trying to touch me with heis foot. So he gave in started hugging me. We had great sex, jst like when we first met. Can anyone help? Same situation? Any comments would be great!
Thanks
2007-03-18 04:38:54 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Seems to me your main problem is that you're having difficulty adjusting to the transition from the passionate phase of new love to the less intense but more long-lasting affection that makes up a steady relationship.
No doubt this is partly because of the two-year long-distance period. These things tend to keep the passion whipped up, for obvious reasons, and you get used to being adoring to each other.
Now you're finally together, and the temperature is cooling. This is actually quite normal, but for you two it represents a shift after three years. If you'd been together continuously, you'd probably have gone through this after 18 months or so, and segued into the easy, friendly, loving familiarity that characterises a more mature relationship.
In reality this is not the death of passion, it's just the relationship growing up. Some people can't take that.
CD
2007-03-18 06:20:31 · answer #1 · answered by Super Atheist 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its time to roll out the good lovin and and stop being lazy sista! If you want this man then its time to put up a fight no excuses allowed! The point is just make a start trying to create some romance and work it from there. Get into just touching each other again for no reason and have proper snogs! something a lot of us forget to do when we've been with someone a while. I know its easy to get stuck in a rut we all do it but babe beleive me you can climb out! Happy Sh*gging!
2007-03-18 05:05:57 · answer #2 · answered by Queen D 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sounds like you aren't the problem. Seems like he wants more fun in his life.
Go out together whenever you get the chance. Me and my partner had similar problems plus (at the time) very little money. We started playing 2 player games on the PlayStation and we actually had a lot of fun, and it didn't cost alot.
We now do lots of things together. Simple things like playing video games together, watching certain TV shows together going out to the cinema or the pub together whenever we can . It's brought us much closer together and we are now very happy!
2007-03-18 04:45:39 · answer #3 · answered by paulbilsborough 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think you two need 2 sit down and talk about it. let each others feelings come out. that way you can touch bases. i felt that my boyfriend was giving me enough time b/c he also works nights/ 3 jobs. so we made it a promise go out once a week that we both has a day off. he didnt even know how i felt he thought everything was ok. but now he realizes.... good luck
2007-03-18 04:45:04 · answer #4 · answered by pisces_dreamer06 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to him about it. Remind him of some old fun times like the one you metioned. The love is there, I think you two just need to show it some more. I hope this helps, Good luck!
nicole
2007-03-18 04:44:39 · answer #5 · answered by nicole 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To be honest we all go through this just take it slow and think befor you leap. Being in a relationship takes time and if it's meant to be it will. I think you guys love one another but need more time.
2007-03-18 04:45:26 · answer #6 · answered by loving U 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think you should talk about it 2 your boyfriend but it sounds like theres underlying problems.talk it out but dont hang on 2 him if u think he dosent love u.thats just dragging things out.things happen 4 a reason there could be someone out there whos perfect for you.
2007-03-18 04:50:39 · answer #7 · answered by Maria 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me like you just need to communicate more. Argue less. Be honest with each other.
2007-03-18 04:43:06 · answer #8 · answered by All Things Zen 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
communicate more... you have to know what the other needs in the relationship.. thats the only way you'll make it..
2007-03-18 05:08:20 · answer #9 · answered by girl_next_door_red 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
people who work diffrent shifts is hard but you can work around it some how
2007-03-18 04:44:57 · answer #10 · answered by aj_p7 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋