if you found out your friend was gay? I recently told all of my friends (4) to be exact that I was gay. I did'nt realize that all of my so called friends would tell me that "if you get down like that than we ain't friends no more". They also said that they could'nt be associated with someone in my lifestyle. So now I've been abandoned by my "homies", and left to wonder what would other people do in this situation? I'm a guy about to turn 21 in 2 weeks, and am really miserable. Maybe I should have never told them in the first place, because as they tell me "you don't act gay, and you had girlfriends, so how do you know your gay", And my response was "I was living a lie, and was hoping to come clean with myself and the people I thought had my back". But obvioulsy that isn't the case. So what would u all do?
2007-03-17 23:14:31 · 11 answers · asked by LG_89 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
I think when men "come out" they have to expect their life to change. As petty as it seems, sexuality seems to determine your friends. I don't see many straight men being frineds with gay men. Its the same as when straight men seem to think that every gay man has a crush on them. A form of "homophobe". Its silly really. Now that you are "out" I think it most likely you will migrate towards others who are more liberated and won't care of your sexuality. Be proud of who you are, and as much as it may hurt, reject those of your past who will not accept you for who you are. Still today people don;t understand homosexuality and see it as a disease, and are repulsed. Im sorry you have to endure this and damn those who don't "get it". I know I would not break off a friendship due to disocobering one's sexuality. I am a straight woman and I have had several lesbian and gay frineds throughout highschool who I did not stop associating with when I realiized their sexuality. My brother claims to be bi, and really I thinkj that is a cover becasue he is too afraid to say he is gay. Bisexuality is soemthing I don't understand....how can you get to like both? Seems greedy. Make up your mind. My mother works for an aids organizationa and through her I have come to realize some things and I now understand a lot about being gay. I do not wish it upon anyone, due to that it must be hard for many to be accepted.
I accept you. There are many more like me. Be proud, be confident, and spread awareness. I do not envy you, for you have many obstacles that I do not face. However, I know that you alone can make a small difference in showwing people that being gay is not a disability and you can strive for success like the rest of us, "normls".
2007-03-17 23:34:48 · answer #1 · answered by Ashley 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The world is filled with wonderful people who will love you for EVERYTHING that you are. Go looking for them. Be thankful that you found out who your so-called friends really are inside. It hurts, but now you're free to find friends who will really care. Try looking for a local group of gays or like minded people on yahoo! and myspace. It's a great way to make friends in your area. Good luck!
2007-03-18 11:02:56 · answer #2 · answered by Emily H 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry this happened to you. I suggest you move on and find more respectable friends. Obviously, your "so-called" friends were just that. They weren't your friends if they let your sexual orientation be the end of your friendship with them. I would hold your head high, tell them all to F*** off and move on. Life is too short to worry about what 4 people think about you. There are millions of other people in this world that needs a good friendship that you're more than capable of providing them.
2007-03-18 06:22:46 · answer #3 · answered by Jay S 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
The only thing that you can say to them is that: This is who i am and if you can not accept that well then that is fine but that is your choice. Also i would give them time to digest what you have told them. At first i am sure it has come to them as a shcok. WIth time they might surprise you and come around lets face it you have been dealing with this for sometime. But if they don't come around then move and find people who will be supportive of you
2007-03-18 07:33:29 · answer #4 · answered by mloinc 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
True friends would be there for you even if they disagreed with your choice of lifestyle. They should have at least discussed why they feel that its wrong, instead of just stopping being friends with you. Maybe you could try to get in touch with them and talk. I think maybe its because they feel threatened and don't want other people to think that they too are gay.
2007-03-18 06:38:16 · answer #5 · answered by turan21 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it was hard thing for you to do and you should be proud of yourself for being honest. If they are true friends they will come back if not their loss and you will find friends that will accept you just the way you are. Im straight but i have respect for honesty and you sound like a nice guy. Good luck and happy birthday when it comes around
2007-03-18 06:58:07 · answer #6 · answered by bobbi 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are better off without them. If they really cared about you, and "had your back" then they would not treat you so shoddily. Those kinds of people are called fair weather friends, and if they're going to be like that to you, you can bet they're like that with everybody.
2007-03-18 06:21:16 · answer #7 · answered by Becca 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
**** them. Wh wouldn you want to be friends with people who dont support you or care about you because they obviously dont.
That would be and was my mindset. You cant change who you are hon. Get new and better friends =]
2007-03-18 06:22:19 · answer #8 · answered by D.Allman 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
they were never your friends to begin with ,if they were the wouldn't have acted they way they did. i can understand them being surprised at first but if they were your Friends, it should have been no big deal to them after the shock wore off.
2007-03-18 12:24:13 · answer #9 · answered by Ron N 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't breakoff friendship.
2007-03-18 10:23:50 · answer #10 · answered by sherree33853 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋