especially if you're a nice guy who's been treated horribly? Part of me couldn't be happier to finally get out, but (as could be expected) I miss having someone, along with having some security, affection, companionship, etc. I guess I will miss her too.....
It has been coming for a long time, and I did know this would come, but still am kind of rocked with mixed emotions. How would you recommend I just get over it and move on?
2007-03-17 19:08:08 · 12 answers · asked by fromorto12 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
i can tell you i was in your shoes about 3 years ago. sounds like i could've written the question. be gratefull that it is over and you can move on with your life and find someone that appeciates you for who you are. but dont jump into a relationship right away. i made that mistake and i am regretting it, but i know the end is near on this relationship too. date some women, have some fun, and i dont mean sleep around. just live your life. i know that it sounds like a typical answer and gives you no real help, but believe me, your gonna get over it quickly enough when the divorce is final and you are free from the relationship with someone that treats you horribly. congrats on your freedom.
2007-03-17 19:15:08 · answer #1 · answered by mcfly_lives 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
The important thing is not to rush. In order to get over a divorce, or any relationship, you have to genuinely deal with the emotions you have. This takes a lot of analysis (i.e. What feelings do I have, why do I have them, how long have I been having them, did they start before my marriage started). Going through this analysis is important in two ways. First, it promotes a great deal of self-awareness. Second, it helps you let go of hurt and in the end better prepares you for another relationship.
Also, don't be afraid to own your feelings, appreciate that their yours and that they are not wrong. It is ok to miss someone and long for companionship. Just don't get involved with someone until you are completely healed. Otherwise, you are going to make life completely horrible for the next woman you decide to date.
You also may be interested in taking a divorce recovery class or spend a few weeks with a counselor who specializes in divorce care. You'll be surprised what you learn about yourself.
2007-03-18 02:28:28 · answer #2 · answered by lyricsop 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Divorce is never easy, even when its been a bad marriage. Its never easy to fail and a divorce kind of makes you feel that way. Shouldn't but it does. Like all things in life, time will take care of it. Better not to waste years in something bad and move on. Staying busy is the secret to getting over things. Stay close to friends and family, try to get out and do some fun things and you will be OK.
2007-03-18 02:15:43 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Work hard even if you are consumed by your impending divorce. Take care of yourself, that means, you eat three balanced meals a day, you take your vitamins, and you make sure you walk and excercise enough. Go to bed early at least get 6 or 7 hours of sleep. Listen to good music when preparing your meals, don't eat 'take outs', cook for yourself, men make the best cooks, keep busy, read novels, the first two years are hard. But after a couple more years things begin to change for the better. Put yourself FIRST, and remember - there are more women than there are men. Work on your self esteem, have self respect and you'll get it from your next relationship.
2007-03-18 02:19:38 · answer #4 · answered by Tinribs 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
well Mr been there- here .bit of a expert now been married twice..OK the 1st time really hurt as i have 2 girls i was a mess but family and support helped .always talk to some one get it out of ya system .another love will help but dont carry any old bad luggage with ya she,ll put up with only so much ,bite ya tonge to say..i finally moved away from melb to darwin and it was the best thing i did lots of x divorce,es up here .but i love it friendly and a great place to relax ok chech www.ecocam for a look at the beack hoo roo markiss nt
2007-03-18 02:20:34 · answer #5 · answered by the gate keeper 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get a dog and have the companionship, affection, better security, and you get to hold the collar. Another person is not going to fill the void inside you. Enjoy the freedom and live a little.
2007-03-18 02:14:49 · answer #6 · answered by another journey 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Y'know, I know a group of buddies that get together each week on tuesday nights...
Its an informal thing - they meet at X restaurant every tuesday at 7 and whoever can, shows up. They have been doing it for 10 years now...I wish I had freindships like that....
They have been together through all kinds of incredible things....
So I would suggest that you start asking your guy buddies out for guy stuff. It will help you get grounded.
Oh, and avoid any dating for a while, your emotional gyroscope is going to be out of wack for a while.
2007-03-18 02:19:36 · answer #7 · answered by freshbliss 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You should not rush into any relationship because all of your stress will go on the person your dating so wait give it time socialize and always have something to do to keep yourself occupied.Trust It happened to me and is still happening now I was the back up for all the emotional crap.
2007-03-18 02:15:04 · answer #8 · answered by SK8R CHIK 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it's tough, i know
this is the women's side of the story
i think that she loved how you treated her sometimes but sometimes she didn't like what you did and you might have not realized it
did you try asking her why it ended up like this?
if you did and if you still want her, did you do your best to try to get her back?
she might not like beggers that much but while you do, tell her how you've always felt about her and that if you tell her how you're sorry for whatever you did wrong...
2007-03-18 02:19:41 · answer #9 · answered by creastian909 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
like most people. stay busy and don't turn to drugs or drink. that is how most people mess it up real bad. time is the cure. otherwise, you get better and involved more in your career and stay out of rebound situations. exercise and do positive things and let time do its work. snow goose.
2007-03-18 02:13:05 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋