2007-03-17 18:59:26 · 14 answers · asked by buckaroo 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Don't pressure her, just be loving. If she's mad, just listen. Say things like: I hear you and I care about how you feel. When she says something, tell her how you plan on making changes. I'm sorry means nothing, it actually means you don't have any plan, you are powerless and so you're saying sorry instead of saying what you will do to fix your shortcomings.
Be specific. If you hurt her in some way, tell her you are going to the bookstore and buying a book on good marriages, self help, ect. Contact a therapist. Tell your wife you are going to help yourself be a more lovable person, to weed through your problems and hopefully she will come with you eventually. It's a lot of work, not a lot of groveling.
You can't make someone forgive you, you can do things to help yourself change into someone who is worth being forgiven. You can't make someone trust you, you can help yourself become a person who might be more trustworthy. You can't make someone fall in love with you, you can only be someone who is lovable...make sense? Work on yourself and listen to her. Do not excuse yourself, in any way, even if you feel a little beat up. Bear whatever anger she has with a smile and upbeat attitude. She will, over time, a long time, see all the effort you are doing and by her own will, be inspired again by you.
I want to add one thing, after reading the other answers. NOTHING is ever hopeless. In fact, even in the case of infidelity, therapists are reporting a very high success rate in marriage recovery with the right kind of help. Do not become hopeless, never- ever give up. If you resolve yourself as unlovable and unforgivable then you will fail. Remember, we all make mistakes. Our character reflects more on how far we will go to fix ourselves, and how much patience we have to allow those changes. It's not about the mistake, it's about who you become because of it. People who succeed learn from their mistakes, they don't buckle when faced with humility. (And the never give up)
Much luck...you will do this!
2007-03-17 19:11:06 · answer #1 · answered by DanaZ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2016-05-05 15:17:14 · answer #2 · answered by Doris 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends on her upbringing.
If her dad was a jerk and her parents remained together than you might have a chance.
If not than you have an uphill battle.
You might try agreeing with her or remaining silent-when she's wrong, complimenting her-when she's right!
Don't forget her Birthday, Anniversary or Valentines Day!
If she has any brothers or sisters than try to develop a relationship with them.
That by itself won't guaranty a good word from her, but at least it will give them something to talk about when she calls home to talk with the family!
What we're talking about here is respect and forgiveness.
As far as falling back in love: you really will have to win the lotto!
2007-03-17 19:28:33 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
boy oh boy what,d u do 1st sleep wiff the sister or friend
or been out wiff the boys ,pub? more info would be good ..women r forgiving as i am and if u learn to forgive you move on in life
i try to forgive the arshole who kicked my brother jimmy in the head and put him in a coma 9 I JUST WANTED TO GO TO PRISON AND KILL HIM0 but my better half of me worked it out so if its that bad u got prob,s if not suck up they love it but wont tell ya its a girl trade thing ok markiss darwin nt and check out www.ecocam .com whilst ya sulking ok its a cam on the beach in darwin hoo roo
2007-03-17 19:09:25 · answer #4 · answered by the gate keeper 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cook for her and wash the dishes afterwords every day for at least 6 months. Always works (!!!)
You can shorten that period of time to 4 months, if you'll also do all the laundry.
2007-03-17 19:06:36 · answer #5 · answered by OC 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Forgive you for what? Having illicit affairs? stealing her money? What? If you have had affairs then it is very hard for her ever to TRUST you again. Love and respect are synonymous, so if you are untrustworthy, you are unrespectable, and therefore, UNLOVABLE.
2007-03-17 19:07:47 · answer #6 · answered by Tinribs 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It probably depends on what you did, but if it was bad enough to make her lose her love for you I wouldn't count on any better chance than a snowball lasting in H***.
2007-03-17 19:05:54 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be very nice, listen to her. act like you care. Do something nice and unexpected for her. treat her like a women. and then fudge
her up.
2007-03-17 19:04:45 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
What did you do, and then maybe we can help you? If you cheated on her, then you are probably my stupid husband and you deserve to be married to Loraina Bobbit!
2007-03-17 19:16:00 · answer #9 · answered by Someonesmommy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give her time and get your priorities straight. Its her or the highway.
2007-03-17 19:07:17 · answer #10 · answered by another journey 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋