well I talk to people & I am a nice person in general..but when they start to get too attached & want to get closer to me..it's like ok now time to push them away and I know that I am doing wrong but I still find myself doing it anyways..
what do you suppose is the matter with me??
2007-03-17 16:11:45 · 4 answers · asked by Nicola 1 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
It's not necessarily that there's something wrong with you. I think it's more a combination of a couple of things. One, you've been hurt numerous times before, so naturally, your defenses kick in whenever someone gets remotely close to your heart. You just don't want to get hurt again. Two, if you've been hurt numerous times by numerous people, it seems that you have trouble picking the right type of people to be friends with. I also suspect that you don't trust yourself when it comes to picking friends. Subconsciously, you're pushing everybody away as a means of staying on the "safe side". If you want to get to the bottom of this problem, start with yourself. Just be honest with yourself when you do it.
2007-03-17 16:32:54 · answer #1 · answered by equalslsp 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is not a good thing, but it is a normal thing. Once you get burned, your defensive antennas pop up. You fear being hurt again--and you will do anything in your power to avoid being hurt. If this means pushing good people away - we will still do it - for insurance against damage by that person.
You should really take a trip to the library, and check out the self-help section. You will find all kinds of books that can help you to start trusting again. You will also find books to boost your self-esteem/self-confidence. A book or two of positive affirmations wouldn't hurt, either.
Feel better :)
2007-03-17 23:27:04 · answer #2 · answered by Holiday Magic 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Thats happened to me my whole life . I really dont know what to say if you have a family member you can tell your problems to that would probably help.I wasnt able to tell anyone and when you get older its even harder to trust anyone .I always say I stand alone but when your old and their is noone their to hold your hand and be with you to the end that makes it seem very lonley.
2007-03-17 23:18:15 · answer #3 · answered by Gypsy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you want to be alone and safe? Or take risks and have friends? Choice everybody on Earth has to make.
2007-03-17 23:15:27 · answer #4 · answered by Kathleen 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋