My partner and I have been together for 3 years. about 1 year ago I found out that she cheated. I ultimately forgave her and we got back together. Yesterday we went out to dinner and as we were being seated she stopped to speak to someone in the restaurant. she spoke w the woman 4 about 3 minutes and never signaled 4 me to come over so I just sat down. When she finally came to our table she sat down and said nothing. So I asked, "who was that" she says, "Oh somebody I used to work with". I just had a feeling that she was lying when I came from the restroom. I decided to probe further and she admitted this woman was a friend of the person she cheated with. I was livid. I felt why would u stop to converse with her and then why lie about it? We haven't spoken much since yesterday but she says she feels that I'm giving her a hard time. How would you feel?
2007-03-17 15:38:46 · 16 answers · asked by bangieb 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
You haven't forgotten so maybe you need to move on. They say once a cheat always a cheat. I think you should find a healthy relationship.
2007-03-17 15:42:33 · answer #1 · answered by BABY GIRL 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I forgave an ex once for flirting with (and hugging on) another girl at a gay bar while I had stepped away. I came back and saw her doing this. Well, after I had forgiven her for that, not 2 weeks later I go by her apartment and I catch her having sex with the same person I saw her with at the bar. *shrugs* these types of people that will lie to your face, and be so bold as to do those types of things right in front of you, they don't change and generally, they don't TRULY believe in committment. What they believe in, is their own selfish desires. Move on. It's not worth the aggravation. I was once told a very good piece of advice. "Don't make some else a priority if they only make YOU an option."
2007-03-17 22:52:11 · answer #2 · answered by I_color_outside_the_lines 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am of the mindset that cheating is the ultimate no-no. I would never forgive a cheater. That being said, I wouldn't be in this situation in the first place. You're a stronger person than I for being able to forgive that offense.
All things considered I feel what your partner did was totally wrong. The fact that she lied to your face is a huge red flag. I personally would be very suspicious of her from this point forward. You know what they say, once a cheater, always a cheater. Please be weary of this behavior!
2007-03-17 22:45:38 · answer #3 · answered by THUB 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you have every reason to be upset. There definately seems to be a trust issue between you two since the cheating incident. I think it was sort of bold for her to speak with the woman like she did and try to lie about it.
You have to figure out if you can work out your differences if you are going to remain together.
Good luck to you.
2007-03-17 22:46:05 · answer #4 · answered by I know, I know!!!! 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that it is rude that your girlfriend had you sit there for there minutes waiting for her while talking to this woman. She should have introduced you to her. She was probably asking about that other person. That is why she didn't want you over there. She lied about who this woman was. That in itself is pathetic. Sounds to me like it is possible that your girlfriend still has some feeligs for this other person that she cheated on you with. She may even be still seeing this person behind your back. It sounds to me like you don't and can't trust your girlfriend. I think that you should just end your realtionship now. Without trust, you can't have a real relationship. You deserve better. You deserve not to be lied to, especially over stupid things.
2007-03-17 22:50:12 · answer #5 · answered by cmg1977 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OMG, I feel so bad for you. I'm going through something similar. My partner and I have been together for five years and she had an affair on me about two years into the relationship and I took her back. I have learned that they can only do to us what we allow. We control our pain and destiny, although it hurts to admit that. If you ever want to vent, email me.
2007-03-17 22:50:58 · answer #6 · answered by ☮ wickey wow wow ♀♀ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, for one, I could never forgive a cheater. There's just no excuse for it. But if I were like you and forgave her, I would be a little suspicious. Not peering-over-her-shoulder-every-second-of-the-day suspicious, but I'd keep an eye out for what she does and who she talks to.
2007-03-17 22:43:24 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would feel the same way. after 3 years there should be no dishonesty, or keeping things from each other, i would tell her that if she keeps lying about theese things that it has to end because you can't trust her anymore.
2007-03-17 22:44:35 · answer #8 · answered by rose01 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Baby, if a person lies once they will lie again. You have to decide if you are ready to accept this person in your life or not. There are other fish in the sea......
2007-03-17 22:43:02 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Exactly how you feel . . .give her the benefit of the doubt. the truth always comes out in the open. When it does you will know, and if she been creepin, she misses out on you.
2007-03-17 22:45:31 · answer #10 · answered by SexySlim 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋