Is it okay to be engaged at seventeen?

Question

I am seventeen and have been dating my boyfriend for a year and a half, and I have known him for almost 6 years. And he proposed to me a few months back (he's 17, too). And I've told a few people and am getting mixed reactions: Laughing at us (you're too young to know what you want) or snorting (we're being ridiculous) or sighing (you'd be throwing your life away) then I've had a few "yay"s, a few "that's cute"s and a few have tried to talk me out of it.
I am just wanting to know other people's opinions on whether it is okay to be engaged at 17...I love him...so thats all that matters, right?
Its not like I'm questioning it...I know I want to be with him, I'm questioning the timing, not the relationship!
Opinions, please!

Okay, we're not planning on getting married now, we're just now planning on getting married...
Thats confusing... we are engaged, but we are not going to get married for at least 2 years (I'm almost 18, a few months away, so...)

Answer 1

Well what I would advice is that you have an extended engagement don't do it until you are ready. Age has nothing to do with it because it is when you are ready and your maturity level. It wouldn't hurt to wait as well, wait a little and see what happens. Not trying to talk you out of it because a marriage is very hard to obtain not the wedding day that is just for blessing and to entertain family. The hard part is when you guys live together and have to face a lot of odds. There are good times and hopefully for you it will have a lot of good ones you will need it for the bad onces. The bad ones are very few in my relationship but sometimes very hard.
This what I want you to remember there are things in a marriage that you have to have like water for everyday living. Those things are love, understanding, honesty, being faithful, trust, honor, very important compromise, willingness to fight for it, support, communication and care. These are the things that would either make you or break you. Please keep this in mind, a marriage is not what it looks like on the outside it is very hard and you have to want it to make it work.
Please be careful about the choices that you are making because my dear friend you are no longer making the decisions for yourself you have to always keep him in mind as well.
I love my husband with all my heart but I keep it in mind that no matter what I have to be there for him as I would like him to be there for me. Also to never listen to anyone on the outside because only our decisions that we make together are the ones that count. Yes there are times that you have to sit and listen at times but never let the outsiders of your relationship get hold of it. Making a third party to this marriage to be or this relationship could only lead to destruction.

Answer 2

I would say no. This is a big problem in the country when people get married too young. I know it seems like along time and im not saying the feelings are not there. But there is so much to do in life and experience on your own. I would always tell people they should at least wait until their mid to upper 20's to think about getting married. This gives people time to do their own thing, travel, have experiences in life, concentrate on a career, and then move on into the family life. Ive also heard and read that the later you wait to get married, the more successful the marriage will be. Just think, lets just say you do get married at 18 or 19.. you have a few kids over the next couple of years, and then something happens and you start to have problems.. You will be at your prime age in life, but have a background and baggage which would turn alot of people away. And finally, i don't know if you can really know if you are in love or not when you are that young. I think everyone feels that way when they are young without knowing alot..
so that is my opinion.. I would not get married for awile if I were you..

Answer 3

I'm sure that you do love each other, but being engaged is more than just loving each other. At seventeen you're not the person you're going to be yet, you both still have a lot of growing to do. I know that I'm definitely not the same person I was at seventeen, I'm not even the same person I was last year. If you're truly meant to be together, it's not going to matter if you wait... don't feel you need take that step to prove to each other, or everyone else, that you're committed... because not even engagement and marriage equals commitment sometimes....

Answer 4

In all honesty, if your happy, then that's what matter most. But you want my opinion, I think your too young to be getting married. Once your married it's like things change. Everyone says they won't, but wait till your married. IT does. I have been married 2 years. With her for 4 years. I'm 25 now. And I still think it was too soon. You have your whole life ahead of you. Don't make a major commitment like getting married that young. Take some time to think about it and weigh out your options. You may find that you want to go to college somewere, but he doesn't want to move there. Once your married then your kinda stuck. Live your dreams and do what you want in life before settleing down.

Answer 5

you may want to consider a long engagement, the you that you are at 17 is very different from the you that you will be 5 years from now....may also want to do some pre-marriage couseling just to make sure you both are ready. But only you know what's right for you...you can get those same reactions at 25 or 55 that youre getting at 17. best of luck to you both! and congrats!

Answer 6

That would all depend on how mature you and your guy are. I was married at 18 and I missed out on a lot of things. I am now divorced from her and have been since I was 24 and I am now 38. You need to be sure that you are ready, and I mean ready for life. Are you planning on going to college? Something to consider. I will not tell you not to get married, that is a personal decision. Do I wish that I had waited, yes. I finally went to college, but it was difficult. My parents tried to talk me out of it but I did not listen, they were right in this case. You should also see what your mate wants, not long term, but right now short term. You two really have a lot to talk about and most guys including me, will not tell you exactly how they feel, he will not want to upset you, so you have to be sure you know what he wants.

Answer 7

yes this is fine and okay as i feel you are old enough to be engaged but wait at least a year before marrying and settling down and make sure that when you do marry that it is for all the right reasons and that you are ready to spend the rest of your life with this man no matter what til death do you part. Good luck to you and congratulations. I wish you the best,

Answer 8

Even if this does not make any sense to you right now, it will eventually. In most cases, it is better if you have a few experiences before you commit the rest of your life to someone. Perhaps, in a couple of years you will wonder if you missed out on anything, perhaps not. Feelings can change and people definately change. Live this experience to the fullest if you want to be engaged, be engaged, it will help you grow.. Just don't have children right away....

Answer 9

I think it's perfectly fine, and I'm so happy for you that you have found you true love so soon, some people don't find theres till there quite old! The only bad thing about the age thing is you wont be able to have fun, like go out and party come home late and yeah. Just don't wait till your in your 30's and realise it. I hope you to live long and happy lives together. Congratuations!

Answer 10

maybe you should just take some time to think about it. If you decide that you really love him, maybe you should just be engaged to be engaged. You should talk to your parents about it. But seventeen is sort of young. maybe you should wait until your eighteen. You shouldnt listen to what other people say. Try to think for your self, but whatever you do dont run away to get married or anything.