i love my wife but every argument ends as saying i want a divorce what do i do helpppppppp?

Answer 1

It sounds to me like you are using the "D" word as your final blow to end an argument.

Ask yourself, do I really want a divorce?

All couples have disagreements and things in which they do not see eye to eye. But - not everyone descends to the level of arguing to solve their problems.

Counseling and help with conflict resolution would be my recommendation. You both need to learn ways to express your desires, needs and wants in ways that are respectful and honest, but not confrontational just because the other party doesn't disagree.

Local mental health clinics, clergymen and your doctor can assist in getting you counseling for free or low cost based on a sliding scale.

If you truly feel that this marriage cannot be saved, seek assistance for an amicable divorce. Consider the children, if there are any, and ask yourself if watching you fight with each other is healthy for them to see and hear.

Hope this helped.

Answer 2

Try a different tactic. Obviously she is not taking you seriously with that one. Or is it true that she wants a divorce as well.

Maybe you should hire a lawyer to draw by the paper work and start the process and then see if she takes you seriously. Or is she like my wife and probably would go ahead with the divorce just to see you sqirm and force you to once again back down.

Are you a man or a mouse?

Does she have you by the proverbial short and curlies?

YOu may not be that effective at argueing your points.

Or she is smarter than you are?

Or she does not really love you?

Are there important reasons why you can not get a divorce?

Are there kids involved?

If so, you should stay married for the kids and just be friends and both bury yourselves in your work or hobbies or outside friends or your kids, etc.

What ever you need to stop saying you want a divorce at the end of your arguments. That gets old and makes you look impotent.

Answer 3

Usually when the word "divorce" gets thrown around ESPECIALLY in an arguement its because she could be angry and talking out of feeling and not really any logical sense. She may not really want a divorce but just saying it out of anger and retaliation probably because it hurts you. If she is serious about a divorce then she can honestly say that she doesnt love you anymore and needs to move on. Sometimes the little things get the best of us. Ask her why she says this and try to be there to listen. I know its easier said than done especially when tempers are up. Ask questions and also give answers. If she really feels that divorce is the way then she shouldnt try to throw it in your face as a weapon but she should talk with you about it. Show her how much you love her and understand why she may be angry. Talk with eachother not AT eachother. Good luck:)

Answer 4

Whoever is saying it... it wasn't clear if it was you or her. The person saying it is practicing for the real thing. Whether they realize it or not. The more it is said, the more easier it becomes to say it and one day it could be final. A lifetime together is full or ups and downs... a typical marriage will have to at sometime deal with children, family death, lies, money problems, possible affair, businesses. 50 years together.... getting a divorce is just trading in the person you are planning to experience all of the life moments I just stated. It is dumb to split... most people regret it even after finally meeting/ marrying someone else later.... they wish that they would have stayed with their first spouse.

Good Luck... and stop saying that!

Oh here is a good one... next time there is an argument, walk out of the room. Take off all of your clothes and walk back into the room and say "Ok I am ready to continue our conversation." I have never seen anyone who can continue to fight with a naked person standing right in front of them... seriously... try it. You may just stop an arguement and get lucky. - My husband is the one who showed me this one... and I couldn't do anything but laugh... he got lucky too.

Answer 5

Maybe stop arguing! Maybe you should accept she has a brain too and can actually make some decent decisions. I'm sorry if that seems like I'm dumping on you, but, I was in your shoes about 15 years ago. Every discussion turned into a heated debate, every debate into an argument, every argument into another two to three days not talking. Finally I decided to let her have her reins. I figured the only way to stop this endless bickering was to show her who the person in the family was that could make the correct decisions. Every time we disagreed I caved in immediately! My plan worked! Wisdom was formed! The look of astonishment was very gratifying. Unfortunately, that look was on my face! Her decisions had potential! They had substance. She was a creative thinker and I almost lost this wonderful tool that our family needed. It did back fire a little. She stopped making most of the decisions. She just wanted me to see that there was no need for the "me Tarzan, you Jane" approach.

Answer 6

I would make an appointment for marital/family counseling and both of you sit down with the therapist and get to the root of the problem. Divorce is not a solution or way to solve an argument. It is the end of a married life together, both of you loose.

Answer 7

Divorce is usually a threat just to get your way especially if she is saying it. She is probally wanting something more than whatever you are arguing for so just figure it out. Do some of the things you use to. Take her to some of the places you use to go. Once you get married things change because of who you are and how you have grown to accomadate each others needs. Do some of those things and maybe she'll find out that she loves you just as much as she did when you met and find out how to accept each other.

Answer 8

well if you both can not decide to try and make your marriage work and not even use divorce as a obtion....and does she love you like you love her.......bitter arguments can do some real damage..........i am sorry for this because it does seem to happen in marriages.......but there is a time to say i have had enough too...........but that is your decision to make.....i wasted 25 years on a abusive , mean, hard man and i now regret this...back then i thought it was best to live with him and raise the boys but i wish i had never stayed and wasted so many good years...............

Answer 9

The only sensible thing to do as you said you love her stop saying hurtful things to her like you want a divorce. I don't know about your wife but when my hubby says anything as in ending our relationship or even mentioning anything like this I would freak and try to make everything better. When we fight we make things better by discussing things and trashing them out so that we don't have to go on over and over about it. I love him more than myself and I carry him in my soul, heart, mind and spirit. Think that you guys should discuss instead of fight I mean there are times that you would disagree I must admit but there is where you display your strength in your marriage. You COMPROMISE! It might be hard but sometimes to make things work out is to settle and compromise.

Answer 10

Dont worrie.When were mad we can say very horrible things that we might not mean at the time.Instead Give her a hug,and a Kiss.Dont argue back.Just let her know that you love her,and your sorry for the issues,and sit down and talk to her.If she does not want to let her calm down a little,then talk to her later on when shes in a better mood,and is willing to communicate with you.